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How much did you "play with" or "teach" your little ones

490 views 7 replies 5 participants last post by  mamaduck 
I think a combination of both is best. You don't have all day to spend playing with the baby, and if you did that's not necessarily a good thing. The baby needs to learn how to play by himself, too. Most babies will ask for attention when they want it and parents should respond by playing with them or even talking to them across the room if you can't go right at that moment to play.

I can't even tell you how much I actually get down on the ground and play or take her into my lap and sing a song or read her a book. It's little moments here and there. Her attention is not that great yet, so maybe 5 minutes here, 10 minutes there. I have an older child and housework so it's not like I devote my entire day to it. I'm there when they need me and that's most important.

I am a big believer in exposing a baby to lots of talking at a very young age. When Abi was a newborn I would have her in the sling, or in the "baby bucket" on the kitchen counter if I was cooking, and just talk to her about whatever I was doing. Talk and talk and talk. And then pause and wait for her to vocalize and then talk back.

Both my kids were very early talkers and early with most motor skills, but I'm not sure it was anything I did. I might have helped encourage it but each child has their own schedule that's hard-wired into them.

Since you mention that your ds has some delays, is he in therapy right now? A therapist can answer a lot of your questions. Your situation may be different than a typical developing child. Maybe you would need to help him move his body or put him in positions that would challenge his developmental abilities.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Kincaid

But, development issues aside - I am curious about how much "mommy time" and mom's play patterns with DC influence them in discernable ways. Those with more than one kid, did the subsequent children who had less one-on-one play/"teaching" time show any differences as they got older? Were there differences in attention span, ability to play independently, intelligence, etc.?
I can only answer for my family. Abi got way more attention than Nitara gets. I mean, I talk to her alot while I"m working but I don't have time to read to her the way I read to Abi, or go with her interest to learn letters and shapes at an early age. And yet she is still ahead in intellectual development and the therapist said some of her language skills are that of about a 24 month old. She can hold a pen and doodle, she can walk down shallow stairs one foot at a time without holding on to anything, she climbs everything, tries to put shoes on, etc.

In other ways she's not at the same level as Abi because I don't spend that much time with her in certain areas. For example puzzles and blocks. I don't even know if she can stack blocks like they are supposed to at this age because I have never sat down to work with her on that (I should, one of these days). She just learned how to put pieces back in her wooden puzzle last week. I don't have it out often enough for her to get a lot of practice. I'm sure that by the time she's 2 she will still be able to stack blocks like other 2 year olds even if we don't do daily practice.

Socially she is way ahead compared to Abi at the same age. She has a big sister to watch and copy. She has learned to wait her turn, to share my lap, to listen and watch my conversations with Abi. So even though I don't work with her as much as I did with Abi on concrete skills, she is ahead in other areas that Abi never had a chance to develop until much later. Nitara also watches her big sister and that's how she became interested in scribbling, climbing things, pushing the toy shopping cart around, bouncing and throwing a ball, and jumping on the small trampoline we have in the house. Abi doesn't work with Nitara either, but she naturally wants to copy her big sister.

I would say that overall there has been no difference in their development. They are individuals and each have their own strengths and weaknesses but they are at about the same developmental abilities. One I worked with a lot, the other not so much but she's an active part of our family.
 
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