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Hi,<br><br>
I thought this might be the best place to post this, realizing of course that your answers are based on your own personal experience. Dh and I are going back and forth about having a second child. We have one wonderful daughter who is 16 months and I am a sahm. We were both graduate students when I became pg with her (totally planned though) and I have not been back to work since finishing up my masters. It has been pretty tight on one salary but we both feel that for at least the first few years one of us should be home with her. Since we believe in extended nursing, it is just easier for that person to be me.<br><br>
I would really love to add another child to the family, and would like to start ttc when dd is 18 months. I would ideally love to wait longer, but I would also like to get back to work for my own career goals. The issue is that dh thinks a second would be way too expensive. I argue that because I would be nursing, the only expense would be an extra set of cloth diapers from the service. We actually qualify for low income health insurance (which means we pay a reduced premium), so presumably we could add the new baby to that. I am not always totally comfortable with the fact that we have that insurance, but my rationale is that we will both be working professional jobs for a long time to come and will more than pay back the extra help.<br><br>
So anyway, that is my long post to ask for your opinions. I am curious how you all have done it.<br><br>
Thanks in advance!
 

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So far dc#2 hasn't cost very much at all. We have bought some new things for her as many of her brothers things are <i>very</i> "boy" but that's about it. If she had been a boy we probably wouldn't have bought anything new.
 

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our second was our cheapest. Since they were both girls we didn't even need extra clothes. we got the most gifts with her. It was lovely.
 

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Ditto what the others have said. I guess how bad do you want another child? There are ways of living a frugal lifestyle to support a larger family.
 

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Babies don't have to cost much. You'll need a carseat and diapers (unless you're washing your own diapers and already have enough if you just wash the ones you have more often.)<br><br>
I guess if you're buying a fancy double stroller, a second set of nursury furniture, a year's worth of infant formula and bottles, a minivan, and a 3-bedroom house, then having a second baby could get expensive!!
 

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Kids are not expensive - parents are <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
Kids don't need a double stroller...but you might want one...<br>
an extra car seat...<br><br>
I think its great you are thinking about it now.<br>
What are your career goals? Could you balance a part time career?<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">I am not always totally comfortable with the fact that we have that insurance, but my rationale is that we will both be working professional jobs for a long time to come and will more than pay back the extra help.</td>
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Okay maybe here's where you are loosing me, I say honestly going back to work with one is 'doable' with two - hey shoot me <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> You are going to double daycare costs etc (even if kids are in school it ends at threeish). If you have student loans as well.... I look at myself if i go back I'd pay over half my salary in daycare costs for the three kids, never mind transportation or other things you can't do if you are working (like bargain hunt <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
Honestly I'd say go back to work to 'start' your career, work long enough to save enough money for a cushion, pay some debts etc as what if you get put on bedrest this next pregnancy, or postpartum depression? And you cannot count on things that other people control like 'low income' healthcare as well government cut backs are always happening.<br><br>
See if you can work at a job not sure what you do, but for a year then see if there are opportunties to job share, work freelance, part time in your field. We had a vet in my old office that did one day a week (at home!) just enough to keep her resume with a job and to pad the income a bit. Sometimes there are nonpaid things you can do to keep a resume up to date.<br><br>
But honestly I'd say sit down, budget, figure out what your goals are, plan for the worst case senario and the best. You can stay home even on a low income if you plan well, but you can also stay home longer with the two kids if you plan very well.<br><br>
just some random thoughts.
 

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I couldn't justify returning to work and paying daycare for one kid, much less two! There are expenses involved with returning to work that most WOHM don't think about, like wardrobe, gasoline, wear and tear and maintenance on your car, lunches. When one kid is sick you have to stay home, still paying the daycare but not making your hourly wage (assuming you are paid hourly). With two kids, when the one kid is sick, the other one will be in a day or two, stretching out that sick time. Medical expenses double. Insurance premiums may go up, depending on your policy. Grocery expenses went up more than I ever realized they would after my 2nd was born. Water bill is higher even though the girls take baths together. I spend twice as much time washing clothes and dishes and picking up toys. Honestly, I think babies really are expensive, even if you do use cloth diapers, breastfeed, make your own baby food, and don't buy into all the commercialization of having children. Sit down and really be honest with yourself about how much you spend on your kid, and to be realistic about what it would cost for two, multiply it by 2.5 or 3. You can't count on reusing all the old baby stuff. You might plan to, and you might get lucky. But I found out the hard way that what worked with DD1 did not work with DD2 at all. One was born in springtime and the other was born in fall, so I couldn't reuse most of DD1's baby clothes, either! And the older they get, the more money I spend on each of them, so keep that in mind too. No, I don't have to spend all that money on them, but I'm being honest with you, and I'll admit that I do spend lots of money on my kids.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Ruthla</strong></div>
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I guess if you're buying a fancy double stroller, a second set of nursury furniture, a year's worth of infant formula and bottles, a minivan, and a 3-bedroom house, then having a second baby could get expensive!!</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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The cost of the 2nd baby for us came when my already meager cooking/meal planning skills were further stressed by having 2 children in the house. We spent A LOT more money eating out after the 2nd baby. Otherwise I'd say it doesn't cost much more to have a 2nd child.<br><br>
Jennifer
 

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The older they get the more they cost. Clothing isn't always in good enough condition to be passed down. Once they are no longer babies the shoes aren't either. It costs more to feed 2. Sports are double the price, as will music lessons be. I am homeschooling and buy double the consumables (main lesson books, crayons, etc.). There are also admissions to zoos, etc. We walk often and mine are only 14 months apart, so we bought a double stroller for the first couple of years. We were able to use the infant carseat for both, but after that they each needed a carseat, and soon my youngest will need a booster (and DS#1 isn't ready to stop using his). I cloth diapered and eventually they were both in larges and I had to buy more dipes and covers. Both require basic medical and dental care, and there is twice the chance of injuries. There are a lot of things you need 2 of; 2 sleeping bags, 2 baseball gloves, 2 sets of skates, 2 bikes, etc.<br><br>
For the basic stuff, housing, the vehicle, etc. there isn't any additional cost. We didn't need a bigger house or car. Gas is the same to transport 2 as 1. The difference in utilities is negligible. I don't have to buy an additional homeschool curriculum. 2 kids don't need any more toys than 1 kid.<br><br>
I'm not trying to shoot you down...just trying to point out some of the basic expenses.<br><br>
Kimberly
 
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