How much is your divorce costing?

723 Views 18 Replies 12 Participants Last post by Raynbow, Apr 6, 2006

LisaSueandBabyBoy

Discussion Starter · Apr 5, 2006

And how long is it lasting? I think I must have the divorce from hell. I know, I know, they all are...But I was told by my attorney last week that I should not expect to be divorced for another YEAR (I've been separated for seven months already) or to have custody of my kids until then. She also said I will spend at least THIRTY THOUSAND DOLLARS. I cannot believe this.

1 - 19 of 19 Posts

Kaitnbugsmom

· #2 · Apr 5, 2006

3

so far it looks like it will cost us around $600 said & done. Major issue came up with our original filing {I was almost prosecuted for falsifiying documents!

} so even though we were told it was final and we were just waiting on the paperwork, it wasn't, and my license with V was issued wrongly..

So now we have to start from scratch...

Ugh.

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Jster

· #3 · Apr 5, 2006

Well, my ex-in-laws spent at least $10,000 on it, I spent about $1500 plus lots of travel expenses. I ended up representing myself in the end...the major custody issues were over, and the court had no reasonable reason to change the visitation schedule...unfortunately, the judge did change it some, which has been hard, but I don't know if having a lawyer would have made much of a difference for me (when I called my old lawyer to ask for some documents right at the end, he asked for an update, and was amazed at all I'd gotton to that point. Half of it he was telling me I shouldn't even bother asking for...)

Sounds awful, hope that it gets resolved!! Will your ex be responsible for some of the fees??

aisraeltax

· #4 · Apr 5, 2006

hate to say it, but mine was contesteda and i ended up spending all the money i had from the sell of my home in Boston to pay the attorney, expert witnesses, and a GAL. and owing more!
my advice is always to try to negotiate. the family courts do NOT have your children's best interest at heart. the sooner you can get it over with the better off you and your children are. other than the marital home and child support, i would negotiate away almost anything (now) to avoid the lengthy trial (we had a 15 day trial). my divorce definitely was HELL!

LisaSueandBabyBoy

Discussion Starter · #5 · Apr 5, 2006

If I were dealing with a sane person it would be easier. My ex-husband to be is an addict and mentally unstable. I want to negotiate, I want to walk away from any and all possessions and inheritances and just have my children. He is unwilling to do anything but contest custody. It's a mess. I have a great, great attorney but I agree, the family court does not have my kids' or anyones best interest in mind.

aisraeltax

· #6 · Apr 5, 2006

yeh, custody was the reason for my fight too. the courts just dont listen, in my experience. good luck to you. if he's an addict, make sure you have a Guardian Ad Litem appointed..that shoudl resolve custody issues if there is evidence of his addiction. add another $15k to the bill though (in my case).
divorce (the process) is so unfair to the children.
too bad your ex believes he should be the custodial parent.

Jilian

· #7 · Apr 5, 2006

I'm very lucky because I was able to get a free lawyer from the family law connection. So far I've only had to pay the $379 filing fee. when I met with other lawyers I was told that my divorce could end up costing around $10,000

There is no way I could ever afford that, EVER. But my lawyer is asking for his fees to be covered by ex, so ex could end up paying him $10,000 for representing me.

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cheyennemama

· #8 · Apr 5, 2006

My bill is up to $3000 so far and STBX's is about $1000. Needless to say, my lawyer's done most of the work. It's expected to be about another $1000 more. Don't know where I'll get that from but oh well.......

Raynbow

· #9 · Apr 5, 2006

Don't know about the money of it yet... (great lawyer & family friend), but I'm on year three. Three years, four months and 9 days....

Jilian

· #10 · Apr 5, 2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raynbow
Don't know about the money of it yet... (great lawyer & family friend), but I'm on year three. Three years, four months and 9 days....

Is that seperation time or actual time it has taken in court? You filed for divorce over 3 yrs ago?! (please say no)

I forgot to add in my post, I've been seperated for almost 2 years now but I only filed for dissolution of marriage a month ago. So technically it has taken a month so far, our first meeting with the judge is in another month.

KBinSATX

· #11 · Apr 5, 2006

Holy cow! I did mine myself for the grand total of $150. Only little glitch is that I overlooked a bank account ex and I had together. We have been divorced for ten years. Four years ago though he got a credit card on that joint account and since he doesn't seem to be paying on it anymore the bank contacted me.
So now it looks like I will have to pay off his $750 debt. Haven't even seen that guy in a decade! I was really bummed out by this but reading how much it's costing some of you I guess I got off easy. Luckily even back then I knew I shouldn't have kids with this guy so that made it a lot simpler.

LisaSueandBabyBoy

Discussion Starter · #12 · Apr 5, 2006

I filed for dissolution of marriage almost immediately after seperating. When I found out that my husband had sex with a woman at a wedding in a hotel room (after-party after the reception) in a room full of people that was the final nail in the coffin. Thank God that happened and I could finally say enough is enough.

aisraeltax

· #13 · Apr 5, 2006

Jilian said:
Is that seperation time or actual time it has taken in court? You filed for divorce over 3 yrs ago?! (please say no)
/QUOTE]

we filed when babe was 2....divorce finally granted when he was 6!! but thats because the GAL was lazy, i had to hire my own expert...and the trial last 15 days!

Ceinwen

· #14 · Apr 5, 2006

Don't anyone smack me... but it cost a grand total of $25.00 CDN for mine.

Gotta be honest though - that's because we did it ourselves and we weren't married. In Canada we we were considered 'common law' because we lived together and had a child.

When ex moved out, I just printed a 'separation and custody agreement' form off of the net (that's what cost me $25.00 cause it was a legal document) and we adjusted it to meet our needs. One week later, we both signed it with an impartial third party witness... and voila. Done!

Having said that, this was only possible due to the amicability of our separation. Basically he left me, and in the end (after the inital shock and betrayal) I was glad to be rid of him.

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BelovedK

· #15 · Apr 6, 2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by zoesmummy
Don't anyone smack me... but it cost a grand total of $25.00 CDN for mine.

Ours was around $$400, we knew the lawyer and he only charged us the filing fee (hiding)

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MsChatsAlot

· #16 · Apr 6, 2006

I've spent about $4000 so far and we're still not divorced. My ex filed for divorce 4.5 years ago......then did nothing for 2.5 years......then we started a separation agreement -- and that took us over 1 year and now I think the divorce is on hold again because he doesn't want to pay for it and I've refused to pay for it.

I know my ex has spent close to $8000 so far.

Alex'smom

· #17 · Apr 6, 2006

Well to get a lawyer and pay the down payment was 3,000 dollars, I am only a month in the divorce proceedings. My lawyer said that my divorce will take only 60 days because we aren't in a custody battle. My ex isnt hiring a lawyer. My court date will be here end of April or in May sometime. Alex'smom

Kaitnbugsmom

· #18 · Apr 6, 2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jster
Sounds awful, hope that it gets resolved!! Will your ex be responsible for some of the fees??

yeah. we are doing it Friday, since he has to have income for the thing to go forward, and his unemployment runs out in June... right around the 60 days post filing date that it *had better be* final

Raynbow

· #19 · Apr 6, 2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilian
Is that seperation time or actual time it has taken in court? You filed for divorce over 3 yrs ago?! (please say no)

I forgot to add in my post, I've been seperated for almost 2 years now but I only filed for dissolution of marriage a month ago. So technically it has taken a month so far, our first meeting with the judge is in another month.

We separated in Dec 2002, he filed for divorce two years ago in April 2004. Funny thing is - HE is the one holding everything up. He's now switched lawyers, so hopefully this lawyer won't be interested in playing the "draw this out" game.

*Oh, and there is no custody part of this - he agreed when he left and has never changed his mind on me having sole custody. He doesn't want to be a father. So, sole custody, no visitation. Makes it easier financially on both of us.

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