How old to stay home alone, and to babysit younger sib?

The police in my state don't look favorably on the under 12s left alone at home, any trouble and that child calls 911 and you will be in the hot seat as a parent. for that reason I would not use a sitter under age 16 for my younger dd & ds'.

We would not leave my 10 yr old ever at home alone. BTW my 15 1/2 yr old is 200 pounds, has a beard , and wears size 13 mens shoes - he is allowed to be home alone LOL but uses the ADT.

Hi, this is my first post in preteens and teens. I've been trying very hard to forget that my older children are 10, 11 and 13 .

My oldest, now 13, is a boy. His sister is 18 months younger than him and is now 11. The youngest, also a girl, is 18 months younger than the middle child and is now 10. The first two are above average bright (75th percentile composite on standardized tests) and the younger is extrememly bright and in gifted classes (95th + percentile). We live in a small (12K) town in rural nebraska. My husband parents and my parents live here as well.

Ok, enough background. Because of developmental differences, my kids all seemed to be "ready" to be left home alone for short periods of time, at about the same time, say, 15-18 months ago. Last summer, I let them get themselves ready for daycare and walk there by 10 am, rather than dragging them out of bed for me to take them at 6:30. Last fall (ages 9, almost 11 and 12), I was hugely pregnant and planning on quitting in November, baby time, I let them come home alone after school. They were home alone about 1 hour and 15 minutes.

Now, I have no problem with leaving any of them home alone for up to 4-6 hours INFREQUENTLY, like if I have to take one of the children up to a nearby larger town for a dr, orthodontist, etc, appt. The youngest, at 10, isn't left home alone much though, one of her older siblings is also almost always home, maybe always in fact.

The baby. Now 6 months. My kids are all EXTREMELY great with the baby. I've left him home alone (yes, I know.. GASP now) with all of them, any of them, for 15-30 minutes for things like picking up other children at pool, grabbing a prescription, and getting 5 or less things from the grocery store. I always have my cell phone and have never had a problem doing it. I wouldn't yet leave any of them for more than that, simply because that's a lot of responsibility, I'm still nursing, and baby eats very frequently and is a fussy butt. They all pick him up and carry him around frequently. They know how to get him in and out of the stroller, carseat, highchair. The two girls have changed diapers with no trouble, mostly the 11.5 year old though.

I really did KNOW when my kids were ready. It was nervewracking, yes. I'm so glad the new baby is allowing me some more time home with my preteens, though, because I'd really hate to think of them home alone this summer or afterschoool everyday for years yet. I'll be going back to work in a year or so, but I'm glad I was here for this rough transition of not still a kid, not yet a teen.

Sorry for the book

Oh, home security system, good idea.

My dd is very mature and has always been excellent with taking care of her brother and other kids. She has always been around younger kids and helped take care of them. She makes flyers "advertising" her babysitting services and posts them all over the house! She has been babysitting her brother with one of us present for two years. She is an extremely responsible kid. (annoyingly so sometimes! she tells her dad what the speed limit is if he's speeding)

But, I do feel a little torn. Dh's feeling is that she could handle it, but not five mornings a week. I guess I agree. But I am a little concerned because of what gethane said below about how she definitely KNEW when her kids were ready. I don't have that feeling like I know she's ready; I feel like she is, then two hours later I feel like she isn't. I think the main thing is I am really trying to give ds the freedom of being at home this summer, and I may have to work in the mornings from 8-12. But I would be less than a mile from home, and I have a neighbor who is a good friend of mine and stay at home mom. So, I'm still undecided and am looking at other options too.

my kids are mature and more responsible then most other kids we meet their age

our choice not to have them be alone at that age is based on my own experience babysitting other children at age 10-11 and knowing the 911 response here can be up to 10 full minutes, we also have 2 registered sex offenders in our brand new nice tract housing have you looked in your neighborhood to check it out???
in our extended family have a cop and a cps worker, i know firsthand that 12 yr old left alone that gets into trouble, even not by his mistake - parent will be held accountable, no matter what his test scores are in school
i am in so cal
your choice to make, but IME don't look at just how mature your kids are- look at their environment around them

We used to do that with the don't answer the phone let the machine get it, but it is not practical for us when I call home to check on them and they do not answer KWIM??? We have a wonderful neighborhood with very friendly nice neighbors too where we know everyone, that is why we know about the RSO

Ever week I am helping a neighbor kid that was home alone or that came home crying from school and was locked out or is babysitting. Every day we have after school kids coming over, not to play but because they need something. Our neighbors toilet overflowed and I'm the one over there turning off the water till the parents get home. The water heater started shaking in another neighbors house and the kids come over here panicked and crying. stuff like that, happens all the time, worse is the kids that are alone till 8pm around here cause their parents commute.
it is my pet peeve that those parents all think it is fine to leave their kids alone or responsible for another child. Even though they are suppsoed to stay in- I have had the door opened for me friday returning the dog that ran away, dug under the fence etc.. also delivering mail that came to our house instead of the right one, this is from last week. and their mom would post here that her kids were very responsible which they are, but thankfully I am not a perv. or worse KWIM??? a new friend and I have a huge ongoing fight about this cause she thinks her kids obey the 'rules' , I sent my dh over when she was sitting in her car so she could see for herself the kids open the door for my hubby- who they don't really know and trust. but have seen a couple times around

I am sorry to keep on posting on this, but to me when kids get hurt and their is no adult there to help It sticks in my heart, this has happened too many times over the last 20 years for me seeing kids that were not ready to care for younger siblings much less themselves be at home and have something happen. Because I am a homeschooling sahm, i think our phone number and house is one that the kids know someone will usually be there to help or talk to.