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Warning...really long emotional post.<br><br>
This has to be the weirdest post, sigh. I'm pretty upset now and sadly I can't think of much else tonight. And, I feel stupid because I know in my head so many more things are important than this!<br><br>
Some of you may have read about how I adopted my cat at the end of last year. She is just flat out incredible...Heaven is outgoing, lovable, playful...she's my best friend. Just an incredible personality, beautiful eyes! Wonderful!<br><br>
Anyhow, I've developed a good relationship with her breeder. She had talked to me early on about Heaven's brother...who has an equally great outgoing personality. But, has really great type, was a quick Grand Champion and would be a wonderful cat for me to show as an alter. At the time she said she thought her son might want him. So, I considered him out of the picture.<br><br>
Well, then a few months ago she writes me an email...."are you still interested in a third cat...? I'm going to neuter that black soon and I want to know if you want him" I call her up wondering which black. And, YEP it's her brother. My heart does flip flops! Yes! Yes! Yes! Of course I'll give him a home. I asked her about her son, if he was sure he didn't want him. She told me she asked him and he said "he couldn't have a cat right now." He wanted her to keep him, but she had too many breeding cats and it wouldn't work as she was cutting back. Anyhow, the months pass. I get a few emails from her along the way. 'Kitty wants a girl and as soon as he gets one he's neutered'. Then, the last email a couple of weeks ago..."hope you're getting ready for him as he's going to be neutered soon."<br><br>
I wrote to her how excited all of us were, and how the girls are absolutely thrilled. They call him "Heaven's brother" and have been talking about him.<br><br>
I had to call her about Heaven's papers today, and at the end of our really great conversation I ask her...How's he doing? When do you think he'll be ready. Then she starts talking...hmm...my son mentioned him the other day. Then she starts talking about a completely different cat, a different color, not as nice type that I don't want. Trying to ask me if I'd consider that one instead <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: . HUH? I was really "surprised-shocked" etc. feeling and it completely felt like my heart fell on the floor. Then at the end of the conversation she told me she would talk to her son and make sure that he "got his head on straight" and takes one of the other cats that she was going to place up for adoption.<br><br>
So, honestly now I don't know what to think. I've been telling my daughters that we were adopting him, I have pictures of him that we look at ALL THE TIME. They ask me when he's coming home. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: Now, of course, I don't know what to say...I don't know what to think. I don't know if it's going to happen.<br><br>
She asked me to think about things and tell me how I feel. I wrote her an email stating my feelings of sadness, and my desire to give him a home. And, I wrote too that I understand as a mother the deep desire that you have for wanting your children to be happy. I of course, expressed how everyone here was excited about him, and that she had written encouraging us to get ready for him as he'd be neutered soon. How, once she offered him to me I felt so honored because I know what an awesome kitty Heaven is, and being that he is so much like her it must be very difficult for her to give up. And, that from knowing her I thought she would have never offered him to our family if she wasn't 100% sure. She said flat out on the phone not to worry, we had "first dibs" on him, not to worry in the phone conversation we had when she offered him to us.<br><br>
Anyhow. It was a long email. I am sure got it accross that I only wanted him....I told her if he wasn't going to come to our home that I would put my third kitty plans on the backburner. I was waiting for that special black, and we all thought it was him. She offered him to me, and I thought she would never do that unless she was 100% sure about it.<br><br>
I feel so stupid now for getting excited, and getting the kids excited. Maybe I should have held my breath and just not let myself get attatched to the idea. I really trusted her word on this. I hope she does follow through like she said she would and tell her son that he was already offered to another family months ago after he declined.<br><br>
So. I don't know what to think now. It's stupid that I feel so bad about this. Please give me some perspective. It hurts way more than it should. I do think, and hope that she will do the right thing. It was a BIG deal for me getting a third kitty. Even DH has been on board with it, and he is exactly what I wanted. Color/type is even nicer than my current kitty's type. Personality awesome too! I hope it's still going to happen.
This has to be the weirdest post, sigh. I'm pretty upset now and sadly I can't think of much else tonight. And, I feel stupid because I know in my head so many more things are important than this!<br><br>
Some of you may have read about how I adopted my cat at the end of last year. She is just flat out incredible...Heaven is outgoing, lovable, playful...she's my best friend. Just an incredible personality, beautiful eyes! Wonderful!<br><br>
Anyhow, I've developed a good relationship with her breeder. She had talked to me early on about Heaven's brother...who has an equally great outgoing personality. But, has really great type, was a quick Grand Champion and would be a wonderful cat for me to show as an alter. At the time she said she thought her son might want him. So, I considered him out of the picture.<br><br>
Well, then a few months ago she writes me an email...."are you still interested in a third cat...? I'm going to neuter that black soon and I want to know if you want him" I call her up wondering which black. And, YEP it's her brother. My heart does flip flops! Yes! Yes! Yes! Of course I'll give him a home. I asked her about her son, if he was sure he didn't want him. She told me she asked him and he said "he couldn't have a cat right now." He wanted her to keep him, but she had too many breeding cats and it wouldn't work as she was cutting back. Anyhow, the months pass. I get a few emails from her along the way. 'Kitty wants a girl and as soon as he gets one he's neutered'. Then, the last email a couple of weeks ago..."hope you're getting ready for him as he's going to be neutered soon."<br><br>
I wrote to her how excited all of us were, and how the girls are absolutely thrilled. They call him "Heaven's brother" and have been talking about him.<br><br>
I had to call her about Heaven's papers today, and at the end of our really great conversation I ask her...How's he doing? When do you think he'll be ready. Then she starts talking...hmm...my son mentioned him the other day. Then she starts talking about a completely different cat, a different color, not as nice type that I don't want. Trying to ask me if I'd consider that one instead <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: . HUH? I was really "surprised-shocked" etc. feeling and it completely felt like my heart fell on the floor. Then at the end of the conversation she told me she would talk to her son and make sure that he "got his head on straight" and takes one of the other cats that she was going to place up for adoption.<br><br>
So, honestly now I don't know what to think. I've been telling my daughters that we were adopting him, I have pictures of him that we look at ALL THE TIME. They ask me when he's coming home. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: Now, of course, I don't know what to say...I don't know what to think. I don't know if it's going to happen.<br><br>
She asked me to think about things and tell me how I feel. I wrote her an email stating my feelings of sadness, and my desire to give him a home. And, I wrote too that I understand as a mother the deep desire that you have for wanting your children to be happy. I of course, expressed how everyone here was excited about him, and that she had written encouraging us to get ready for him as he'd be neutered soon. How, once she offered him to me I felt so honored because I know what an awesome kitty Heaven is, and being that he is so much like her it must be very difficult for her to give up. And, that from knowing her I thought she would have never offered him to our family if she wasn't 100% sure. She said flat out on the phone not to worry, we had "first dibs" on him, not to worry in the phone conversation we had when she offered him to us.<br><br>
Anyhow. It was a long email. I am sure got it accross that I only wanted him....I told her if he wasn't going to come to our home that I would put my third kitty plans on the backburner. I was waiting for that special black, and we all thought it was him. She offered him to me, and I thought she would never do that unless she was 100% sure about it.<br><br>
I feel so stupid now for getting excited, and getting the kids excited. Maybe I should have held my breath and just not let myself get attatched to the idea. I really trusted her word on this. I hope she does follow through like she said she would and tell her son that he was already offered to another family months ago after he declined.<br><br>
So. I don't know what to think now. It's stupid that I feel so bad about this. Please give me some perspective. It hurts way more than it should. I do think, and hope that she will do the right thing. It was a BIG deal for me getting a third kitty. Even DH has been on board with it, and he is exactly what I wanted. Color/type is even nicer than my current kitty's type. Personality awesome too! I hope it's still going to happen.
