[jenmk]

My boys, 4 and 2, get real wound up after dinner/before bedtime. This is really the only time of day that they get crazy . . . they run around a lot, sometimes the 4yo gets a little rough (it's more likely to happen at this time of day), but mostly there's a lot of laughing and playing on fast-forward. Which makes it difficult to get them to settle down for bedtime.

We have a routine: shower/bath, snack, brush teeth, read books with soft music playing, sleep time. DH and I do not encourage the craziness . . . we stay calm and serene, keep lights low. We also do not discourage it, other than trying to direct them to quieter tasks, like doing a puzzle. They often keep jumping up while we're reading stories and run out of the room, and then back in.

I've thought about putting in a video because that keeps them still and calm, then going to bed to read. Actually we did that the other night because the little one had had a late nap and I knew he wouldn't be settling very easily at the normal bed time. So they watched a half hour video and we had a lovely, calm, and peaceful bedtime. Which is what I want to have for them and for us. But I hate the idea of doing a video every night as a part of the bedtime routine. But I also do not like how irritated DH and I get as we try to get the two little guys to calm and settle.

Anyone else have this sort of situation? What do you do to get your kids to settle at night?

 

[MamaBug]

Moving this to Childhood Years

 

[Jmo780]

Well I was going to suggest a routine, but it seems like you have a great one!! So I can only offer my sympathy

I hope you find something that works for you!!

I will admit that for the boys we do allow them to put a video in, lay in their beds and fall asleep-I will go in and turn it all off when they go to sleep, and turn the nightlight on. It keeps them calm and keeps them from "Playing" around and getting hyper-It also does relax them and kinda zone them out some.

I'd say they are sleeping within 20 minutes of the video and all is peaceful

The girl falls asleep with me, in bed (we co-sleep still) after telling stories and jokes together-Then I sing to her and she is out...

Good luck!

 

[jillmamma]

Here is my suggestion. Take them outside (backyard, front, park, whatever) and let them run around and burn off some energy either right before or right after dinner before their bath/showers. Or if weather does not permit, put some music on and dance, make a pile of cushions in the living room to jump on, do jumping jacks, whatever. Doing this makes a HUGE difference for my DS who is 3.5. He is able to settle down much more easily for bed after having some exercise, and then his bedtime routine (his is bath, brush teeth, pj's, either come downstairs and play quietly for a bit if early enough, or just go to bed and nurse a few minutes, then go to sleep). Boys have WAY too much energy otherwise, and can drive you bonkers!

:

 

[User101]

I've heard that videos actually have the opposite effect of stimulating the brain and discouraging sleep.

My kids love a bath with some peaceful essential oils (lavendar, chamomile) and/or a kid massage. Follow it up with story/song/prayers and bed.

 

[LynnS6]

How about a designated 'burn off the energy and silliness' time before you start the quiet routine. My kids absolutely NEED a good run before the bedtime routine (winter is hard!). Now that it's summer, we go to the park every single night after dinner.

I too have heard that videos can interfere with sleep (especially nightmares) and since you don't want to do it, I wouldn't.

Here's what we do:
-Dinner
-Evening "run" or large motor activities (preferrably with you and/or dh -- a good time for wrestling, for example, where one of you can make sure the boys don't get overly aggressive)
-Quieter activity (but not as quiet as reading), such as coloring, card games, puzzles or something. As they get older, you could do a board game
-Clean up time
-Pajamas (if you do a nightly bath, insert here)
-Snack
-Stories
-Brush teeth
-Bedtime prayers, songs, then sleepy time

So essentially our bedtime 'routine' is the entire time after dinner -- it's just that our kids don't realize it!

 

[oliversmum2000]

do your children have their main meal of the day at dinner time?

if so having a large quantity of food may be giving them lots of energy and making them feel very wide awake and active.

i have started giving my boys their main meal at lunch time. this is great for 2 reasons, 1, they seem to have that rush of energy you mentionned in the afternoon and it sustains them all afternoon. and 2 i have found that giving them a smaller amount of food at bedtime makes it easier for them to settle, plus i find that evenings are a lot less stressful, if when they are getting tired i am not spending time making a meal and just make sanswiches / cheese on toast or something else light and small.

 

[jenmk]

Quote:

Originally Posted by oliversmum2000 do your children have their main meal of the day at dinner time? if so having a large quantity of food may be giving them lots of energy and making them feel very wide awake and active. i have started giving my boys their main meal at lunch time. this is great for 2 reasons, 1, they seem to have that rush of energy you mentionned in the afternoon and it sustains them all afternoon. and 2 i have found that giving them a smaller amount of food at bedtime makes it easier for them to settle, plus i find that evenings are a lot less stressful, if when they are getting tired i am not spending time making a meal and just make sanswiches / cheese on toast or something else light and small.

That's a great idea. I know having the main meal at lunch is better for everyone . . . but my boys don't eat much in general, so dinner is usually a light meal (as is every meal for them! every once in a while they actually eat a good amount), ie. yogurt, sandwich, maybe a little of what DH and I are eating. They are just not big eaters.

I've heard that videos are stimulating too . . . I certainly don't want that. That's one reason I'd rather not do videos, in addition to just not liking the idea of regularly doing a video before bedtime.

Thanks for the suggestions, mamas.

 

[doulatara]

Chamomile tea works wonders for my daughter- and for her friends and cousins when we have overnight guests. I also would normally suggest using some lavendar essential oil in the bedroom while you are reading and going about your routine...but recently I read an articile saying lavendar and tea tree oil *might* be causing a buildup of extra breast tissue in boys. Also, a nice backrub/light tickle can be very effective; it's how my SO gets me to calm down and go to sleep if I'm stressed out!

 

[Magella]

This works better in the fall/winter than in the summer (because it stays so light out so late in the summer), but I've found that a shower or bath about an hour or so before dinner, dimming all the lights starting about a 1/2 hour before dinner while putting on soft music and encouraging quiet activities (helping me cook, reading, coloring, "camping", etc.), and having a candlelight dinner helps my kids unwind and get ready for bed. The quieter, darker and more soothing we make the environment in the evening, the easier it is for them to fall asleep.

We use lavender at bedtime too, for the girls. My son doesn't need or request it. We've also found that for our kids, reading stories isn't something that helps them relax, while telling "a made-up" story that includes plenty of relaxing imagery does. My oldest likes us to do guided imagery with her ("imaginings") with lots of themes of floating and then settling somewhere to fall asleep. Backrubs help them all relax.

My kids also tend to be less hyped-up overall when their sleep routine is consistent and when they're getting lots of physical activity outdoors (particularly early in the morning, to set their internal clocks a bit).

 

[bugmenot]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jmo780 I will admit that for the boys we do allow them to put a video in, lay in their beds and fall asleep-I will go in and turn it all off when they go to sleep, and turn the nightlight on. It keeps them calm and keeps them from "Playing" around and getting hyper-It also does relax them and kinda zone them out some. I'd say they are sleeping within 20 minutes of the video and all is peaceful

Wow. That reminds me of that one nanny show where she said that TV stimulates the mind (which it actually does.)

I agree with the other posts...let them run around like absolute crazy after dinner. Take them to the park, or the backyard, just let them go hog wild outside.

If they're busy all day, then your mission is easier.

 

[oneotamama]

Do you think they're overtired? What time are they going to bed? What time are they waking up? Are they napping? How many hours are they sleeping in a 24 hour period? I know sometimes at our house if we miss that window of opportunity the kids get really revved up and bedtime is delayed big time!