[Lisa1970]

I have 7 toy boxes total, plus 3 under the bed boxes of legos. 2 of the boxes are stuffed animals, 1 is dressup clothes, 1 is for makebelieve stuff and the last 2 are for everything else. I have book shelves for books and a dvd shelf for dvds.

Problem is, no matter what, even my 14 yr old puts up an act that he cannot figure out how to pick up. I will assign each child a box and say collect everything for this one box, that does not even happen. Then the 14 and 12 yr old scream injustice as they claim the other one is not doing their job. 12 yr old will huff out of the room, but 14 yr old will sit there doing nothing. Or he will extremely slowly, I mean, obviously slowly, pick 1 thing up, very slowly walk to the box. Slowly open his hand to let it slip out in to the box, then stand for a while as if looking for another peice (even though there are many peices, no need to look for them) and eventually, slowly, work his way to the next peice. Literally, he picks up legos one at a time. He is 14 yrs old!

14 yr old has been asked to just pick up one dumped toy box. But then, some things went missing. I finally caught on to dump the box. DH's wedding ring was in there, some books, some DVDs, and the remote to the TV. I already told you how painfully slow he moves. I feel like he does it this way on purpose in hopes that I will not assign it again.

I think the real solution here is to get rid of toys. The boxes of misc. type toys should probably just be tossed. I should pick half the stuffed animals. Not like they sleep with them and are attached to specific ones. But I am so afraid of tossing something and then finding out they are of some special sentimental value. Plus, they have enough toys that the remote control car might be in one room and the remote at the bottom of a toy box elsewhere. I am wondering if I should just scratch it all and toss it all figuring they will get new remote control cars eventually and so on. I generally do not let us keep more than a couple at a time anyway.

What do you think? Any advice? Oh, and please don't suggest having the children help when toys are being thrown away. The problem with this is they will suddenly be attached to something and desparately need it, when in reality, they could not care less about it.

 

[GuildJenn]

At 14 and 12 I myself would let them have their room the way they want it, except that once a week they would have to tidy it well enough for me (or them) to vaccuum.

I personally believe the teenage room is kind of like a young wolf peeing on trees; the mess is used to mark territory.

I would however have them watch Clean Sweep or some other show like that once in a while, to give them some guidance on what might help. I also would expect that their stuff is not taking over the common areas of the house.

 

[Lisa1970]

I am having them help with the playroom..not their rooms. I ignore their rooms. So it is community areas. Honestly, it is not their messes, but...it is a family thing. They might clean that while I do dishes. So..I am washing their dishes, but they are picking up the stuffed animals. See what I am saying? They do not play with this stuffed animals.

 

[mamarootoo]

we cycle toys, so i'm not throwing them away, just putting some away for a month, then trading out.
what i do is sort the toys into different categories (battery operated, stuffed animals, shape sorter types, cars, etc.) count how many are in each category, and decide what percentage i want to get take out of play. then i take that percentage (usually 50%) and put them in bags, and put them in the closet.

you could do that, and just hang on to the ones you're ready to get rid of for a month. if they don't miss something by then, just donate them, without taking a second look

are these toys for the 14 and 12 year olds, or do you have younger kids too?

 

[GuildJenn]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lisa1970 I am having them help with the playroom..not their rooms. I ignore their rooms. So it is community areas. Honestly, it is not their messes, but...it is a family thing. They might clean that while I do dishes. So..I am washing their dishes, but they are picking up the stuffed animals. See what I am saying? They do not play with this stuffed animals.

Oh that's totally different. I'm not sure in that case. I do know I'd say "we can have 5 bins and that's it." as a start. But after that, not sure.

I guess I'd have a meeting with them to brainstorm and see what they come up with.

 

[zech13_9_goforgold]

My mom had us put all the toys in a pile in the middle of the floor (like all the stuffed animals), then had us each pick out one animal at a time to keep. That way, we made the choice which to keep and which not to keep. I think we reduced a pile of 50 down to 9. You can do the same thing with the other types of toys.

 

[mama_mojo]

That sounds like alot of toys to me, but perhaps... I don't know. I'll just tell you what I do when I'm beginning to feel overwhelmed by the children's toys.

I send everyone on an outing. Then, I start at one side of the room with a basket and a trashcan, and I sort as I go. This sorting is done with gentleness and sympathy; I do not throw everything away, but I know what is actually played with and what is out just because it was in the way of something else.

Next- there are certain categories of toys that I throw away any time they have strayed. So, if I find bits of playmobil or legos at the foot of the stairs, I throw them away.

Finally, I have quit giving my children any toys for holiday times. They get clothes, bubble bath, books, or outings. When I feel strongly that one of them would really enjoy a certain new toy, I reflect on it for a few days. I think about what will happen when they're done with this toy, how hard the toy will be to tidy up, and what the lifespan of the toy will be in our family.

 

[snoopy5386]

whose toys are they cleaning up? I can't believe a 14 and a 12 year old are playing with toys at all. If no one plays with the stuffies I would whittle them down to 5 or less. Get rid of whatever they don't play with. If you are worried about them pining for it after it is gone, put the stuff in the basement/garage for 6 months. If they don't ask for it in that time frame then dump it.

 

[mumkimum]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mama_mojo Finally, I have quit giving my children any toys for holiday times. They get clothes, bubble bath, books, or outings. When I feel strongly that one of them would really enjoy a certain new toy, I reflect on it for a few days. I think about what will happen when they're done with this toy, how hard the toy will be to tidy up, and what the lifespan of the toy will be in our family.

I like this attitude.

Having fewer toys will help a lot. My mom got us lots of used toys that cycled through our house. She'd get rid of them often without asking us (and sometimes asking us) and it was never a problem for me or my sisters. Nothing that we were sore about her having gotten rid of. I think things we weren't good at picking up were gotten rid of faster. Keeping it in the house but out of sight for a month or two is a good idea to get started.

 

[prothyraia]

Grab everything that's left laying around the living room. Box it up. Hang on to it for a month, or two. If there is something they're especially attached to or a piece to another toy they need they'll notice it's absence eventually.

If they don't ask for it after 8 weeks, it can't be that important and can be thrown away.