okay, what i mean by this is--
there are so many people in my life unsupportive of AP, without even knowing what it is. my instinct is that i have to find a way to manage these people or i'll have to burn a lot of bridges because the criticism is too much for me to take.
one example: i have a close friend who is not even a parent at all. she has nannied and thus thinks that makes her a baby/kid expert, and obviously thinks she knows more than i do. i told her i was having some trouble with depression, going back on my meds (i was trying to reach out and just let her know what is going on in my life), and she promptly started brainstorming things to change that will make me happier (because "what you're doing is obviously not working for you")...like not co-sleeping, putting baby in her own room with no monitor because our house is small enough to hear her if she REALLY cries
or like she told me i only REALLY need to BF for 3 months (what does that even mean??!?!)...and that i should not try to have any goals about BFing. (well, i do--i want to do it for at least one year, preferably two or more). she said i am probably just the kind of person who doesn't enjoy it...(who DOES enjoy it when it's 24/7 with a newborn AND you have PPD?!?!?! i am holding out for the good parts!)
i was just so overwhelmed when she was talking to me. i tried telling her i don't think i really need to change a whole lot, just my brain chemistry!
maybe the depression is just making me ultra-sensitive...i dunno. if she were a stranger, i'd be better able to ignore her. but we are good friends. she's going to be in my life. (also, she's offered to start watching the baby for a couple of hours here and there whenever we're ready so DH and i can go to dinner or something--which i will never be comfortable with if she's going to push this agenda!) how do i explain to her that yes, i am a new parent, and no, i don't know exactly what will work in my family, but there are some things NOT up for discussion, such as switching to formula, moving baby to her own room right now (i'm not committed to co-sleeping for a long long time, but for now, it is important to me), CIO EVER, etc., etc. do i just tell her that? can i ever expect any support from someone like her?
this post is already too long, but i'm having some of the same issues with my family--who i'm close to as well. i feel like my whole social support system is crumbling because of my parenting choices. but i am very committed to these choices. you more seasoned folks, how have you handled situations like these?