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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So great news dh might get transfered to MD for big money....but travelling about 3 weeks out of 4 home on weekends...or what's left of them.<br><br>
We'd have to move there (we live up in the great white north)<br>
So because I have you know dreams of 6 bedroom homes, plasma screen tvs and matching hummers lol kidding girls but you know more money away from family it can make you spend more and hubby being gone will render me an alone parent.<br><br>
So girls... Now who knows how long the move would be..after all I am Canadian <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> but dh bestfriend is in NJ and they have kids our age so...it could be two years it could be twenty.<br><br>
Buy a house, rent a house, rent tiny apartment leave crap of our lives in storage...for that one day cottage (easier than trying to get dh to throw out his glory days <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">.<br><br>
Any traps we might fall into? How to get employer to really cover true cost of the move? I just hate paying for dh to be employed.<br><br>
I want to get things solidified in my head my one car frugal trying self before I get there he makes more money and we morph back into a two car, big house I have to clean myself, creditcard debt family.<br><br>
suggestions?
 

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We had a move (actually 2) covered by an employer before. For my dh, they just told him to get three quotes, then they told him that it was acceptable. Some companies have preferred moving companies.<br><br>
I'd say, if you were going to have a company move, definitely let them pay for it. Let them pack your stuff, move your stuff, store it (if necessary), then move it into the new place.<br><br>
If the company is willing to move him, they'll be willing to pay for this. They should also be willing to pay for any motels/restaurants/gas you need along the way getting to your new place. What they won't pay for is stuff like deposits on utilities, car registrations, etc.
 

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Hey congrats, sort of. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I responded to your other post.<br><br>
First thing is first, get thee on realtor dot com and check out home prices. I believe some areas of Maryland are pricey.<br><br>
How permanent is this move? Is there a chance that he may move again in the next couple years? Is his job stable? If your area is pricey, and you have to move and sell your home (for a lot more $$) before 2 years is up you may owe capital gains taxes. If you really don't think you'll be there long, its not worth it to buy a house.<br><br>
Second thing is going to be figuring out how much your DH will be spending on his "traveling expenses" since he is going to be gone for so long during the month. Obviously you can't pack him lunches-and its going to be really hard to control his spending unless he's onboard with your frugal budgeting. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> This will include smokes, food, gas, car repairs, computer & entertainment.<br><br>
Use a cost of living calculator. You can find this on cnn money website. Figure out what you and the kids spend on food, entertainment, playgroups, clothes, whatever and use the c.o.l. calculator to multiply it.<br><br>
I hate to say it, but you may need a second car. If you have awesome public transportation, thats great, but he's going to be gone for so long I would worry about emergencies andnot having family around.<br><br>
See if the employer will send you and hubby down there to "visit" and check the city out. You can take the opportunity to find a real estate agent, apartment, check school system, crime, public transportation, etc.<br><br>
HTH
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">How permanent is this move?</td>
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Thats what I am trying to figure out... its not just his job but really will I feel comfortable in the good old usa? I am a bit of a raging socialist <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"><br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">If your area is pricey, and you have to move and sell your home (for a lot more $$) before 2 years is up you may owe capital gains taxes.</td>
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oh yeah I forgot about that aspect we dont' have capital g. on houses..<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">If you really don't think you'll be there long, its not worth it to buy a house.</td>
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now I am being ignorant I am sure but is the same standard available in rental vs owning? if its a pricey area there should be nice rentals in good neihbourhoods?<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">Use a cost of living calculator. You can find this on cnn money website.</td>
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thats a good idea.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">I hate to say it, but you may need a second car. If you have awesome public transportation, thats great, but he's going to be gone for so long I would worry about emergencies andnot having family around.</td>
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yeah I was thinking so too.... its not a bad thing but I am not sure how easy it would be to buy/lease a car new to the country...with no credit history there...<br><br>
But his travelling a lot would also leave us freer to pick a place we liked as if he'd only be in the office 5 days a week, and going to the airport then we wouldn't be as tied to a commute...<br><br>
Its kinda freaking me out as our financial variables here were so 'set'. Car paid off, we don't pay utilities, schools, healthcare....but moving would really throw so many of those things off atleast for the adjustment period
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Shiloh</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">now I am being ignorant I am sure but is the same standard available in rental vs owning? if its a pricey area there should be nice rentals in good neihbourhoods?<br><br>
thats a good idea.</div>
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Im sure you will be able to find a nice rental in a good area with excellent schools. Some people in California and New York HAVE to do it, since house prices are so expensive.<br><br>
In the states, you have to live in your house (that you bought) for two years, otherwise you will be charged capital gains tax. Of course there are some exceptions (such as moving for a job over 50 miles away) that make the capital gains not as harsh.<br><br>
If he's seirous about moving to the States, go over to the "finding your tribe" area and check out the "Maryland" subcategory. You can probably find some like minded mamas who will be able to tell you about the culture, house prices, bad areas and towns, etc.<br><br>
Good luck, I would have a hard time leaving Canada! I love it there...we went to Toronto on our honeymoon, and it was a wonderful city...the smaller areas are nice too (clean!), love how your highways have no advertising. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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My dh travels some and I find it harder to eat at home when he is gone. Personally this bothers me more from a nutritional standpoint than a financial. Because when we eat at home we eat healthy mostly organic meals.<br><br>
While he gone technically we should be able to spend less on food since his meals paid for via his expense account. He also seems to get the desire for lattes and microbrewed beer out of his system on the company nickle. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"><br><br>
Having your partner gone is hard especially when you have a partner that is an active parent. Also I have too few IRL friends and family around and I get bored on days that I SAH and I am exhausted on the days I WOH. Currently, I would take a dh that made less money and was home all the time over a dh that traveled 3 out of 4 weeks.
 

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hi,<br>
We left Ontario for Philly suburbs in 97. Our biggest mistake was not researching the cost of living well enough. For the first few years we were more poor then we'd been in Canada. I couldn't legally work so we where also solely dependent on dh for keeping the family financially afloat.<br>
My hubby was also on the road most weeks and the isolation I suffered with being stuck in the house with a toddler for days on end was very trying on our marriage. I also found myself going out for dinner often with my son to get out of the house and have some adult interaction.<br>
Getting credit back then was difficult as they didn't check between the two countries. I'm not sure if they do check now.<br>
It took about 3 years before I had some real friendships. After that I loved it. I went back to school. (Although it's was expensive as I am Canadian).<br>
Two and a half years ago we headed to the border for a 'routine' renewal on our visa which we had done 2 other times with no trouble. The qualifications had changed for this visa (unknown to us) and we were given 3 weeks to pack up our things and get out. Our whole family was devistated to say the least. My son didn't even remember living in Canada. (He was just barely 3 when we moved to PA.) I don't know if we'll ever truly get over having our lives uprooted like that. Luckily we never bought a house there, because we had heard of things like this happening. We couldn't get a moving truck big enough for our belongings and as a result, my neighbourhood had a great time picking through about 2/3 of what we owned as it sat on the curb. So we drove home to Ontario with our son, a 'philly cat' and 'the most expensive hampster'. (We had to take the hampster to the vet to get papers to bring it across the border.lol) We were lucky, we had a place to live when we got back, and jobs to go to, otherwise we would have been homeless. I tell you my story, not to put a downer on your decision. We don't regret going...it was a great experience for all of us...BUT research research research, and remember once you're there on a visa, you don't have the same rights as an American. Feel free to email me with any specific questions. Best of luck with your decision.<br>
OntarioTarstar
 
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