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I am turning into the big mean mommy while he is the one who has all the fun with dd. He threatens all the time when she's misbehaving but rarely follows through. Two days back I shut myself in my bedroom with the baby and listened while he tried to put her to bed. He told her to do things or not do things 47 times!! I kid you not. And never did he follow through when he made threats to take things away or whatever. So for 45 min. he just barked at her like a drill seargent and she could care less about listening to him. I was the one who finally came out and finished putting her to bed after the baby was rocked to sleep.
We had a talk about it later, he and I, about consistency and following through and some other strategies he could use in the future. He listened I thought.
So today dd took part of a bike lock and scraped it on the wall and it made a mark. Dh was near her and asked her not to do it again. She looked at him and immediately did it again and left another mark on the wall. He told her, "Now Daddy said not to do that again, right?" and that was it. That was all that happened. No taking the lock away, no making her try to clean the mark off the wall. Nothing.
I was sitting there holding a fussy teething baby, tired, sleep-deprived as usual, and pretty helpless to follow through. And why should I have to when he's right there??
Whenever I discipline my dd she runs to daddy if he's home and he scoops her up and says, "Ahh poor thing, are you crying? Did mommy get angry at you?" The funny thing is though, that when she's really hurt she comes running to me, not him. Even though I'm the mean disciplinarian, she still prefers Mommy in times of real crisis.
Any suggestions on how to communicate and get through to dh, or am I just destined to be only one who follows through with things?
Darshani
We had a talk about it later, he and I, about consistency and following through and some other strategies he could use in the future. He listened I thought.
So today dd took part of a bike lock and scraped it on the wall and it made a mark. Dh was near her and asked her not to do it again. She looked at him and immediately did it again and left another mark on the wall. He told her, "Now Daddy said not to do that again, right?" and that was it. That was all that happened. No taking the lock away, no making her try to clean the mark off the wall. Nothing.
I was sitting there holding a fussy teething baby, tired, sleep-deprived as usual, and pretty helpless to follow through. And why should I have to when he's right there??
Whenever I discipline my dd she runs to daddy if he's home and he scoops her up and says, "Ahh poor thing, are you crying? Did mommy get angry at you?" The funny thing is though, that when she's really hurt she comes running to me, not him. Even though I'm the mean disciplinarian, she still prefers Mommy in times of real crisis.
Any suggestions on how to communicate and get through to dh, or am I just destined to be only one who follows through with things?
Darshani