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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I feel stupid for being so upset, but I can't help it. Dh left very early this morning for four months for work...he was really struggling to find a job since right after Thanksgiving when we moved here. Financially, we have been doing really bad with no money coming in, I thought we'd have to move in with my mother for awhile to get on our feet. As a last resort, I sent his resume (after asking him, of course) to a few cruise lines, and one hired him. He doesn't get back until mid-July, and I have been beside myself all day. I have never lived alone before. I have a vehicle that's big and extremely intimidating for me to drive (today was the first day I drove in well over a year). I don't even know my way around to places here (I was very pregnant when we moved and haven't done much at all). Our son is six weeks old, and sometimes when he gets fussy, only Dh can comfort him. I so badly want to call him and tell him to come home. We need the money (we're really far behind in my student loan payments and a bunch of other things), this is a job in his field that he went to school for and he's getting paid well, but part of me feels so stupid for sending his resume. I don't want to call him or e-mail him right now because I know I'll just make him upset if he knows how upset I am. I guess I just needed to vent, I'm so sad.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/grouphug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="grouphug"><br><br>
Can you move in with your mother until he returns?
 

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As a military wife, I know what you are going through. It can be really difficult. My DH used to go away for months at a time as well. I HATED it, especially in the beginning. I do have to say was actually easier once I had DS bc I felt less alone. I used to go home to my family for a few weeks, that always helped. And I'd plan my family and friends' visits for while he was away. It's really hard when you are new to a place as well. Can you maybe go to LLL meetings or something to start meeting some new people?<br><br>
There are actually pluses to being alone....you can be messy if you want <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">, you get to really stretch out in bed, doesn't matter if you don't take a shower <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">, you can go out for as long as you like and no one cares what time you get back (day outings, malls, museums, zoos, friends' houses, the like), and the reunion is ALWAYS the best part.<br><br>
DH always had email access on his ship, so the deal was he would HAVE to email me once a day so I knew he was ok. I'd email him as many times as I felt like it, and send pictures. It was expensive to use the satellite phone ( I don't know what the situation is on a cruise ship) so we had a "date" set for every Sunday, where we'd spend $30 for 14 minutes of conversation.<br><br>
You may not like it, but you will get used to it and it does get easier as time goes on. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
You are going to amaze yourself. You will find strengths you didn't know you had.<br><br>
It's hard to see it now, but you will.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thanks, guys.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Maman*Musique</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/grouphug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="grouphug"><br><br>
Can you move in with your mother until he returns?</div>
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No, she's across the country and we have several pets. She is going to come visit me soon, though.
 

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Pariah you definately will find out that you are MORE than able to survive without him being right at your side. I am (well, was) a VERY dependent wife of a (still am wife though) military husband. During his first ever deployment I learned that there's life after they "go on the road" so to speak.<br><br>
You miss them dearly, but you also learn that being a singular person in a household that's actually two is a bit easier than it seems at first.<br><br>
You will be FINE, even if it's a little rough here and there. I hope that you get adjusted quickly to everything and that things turn out well. Good luck.
 
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