[Kerrie]

**cross-posted in childhood years**

I think I hit my threshold - I have 3 kids (7, 5 and almost 3), provide childcare for 2 (6 and 4) 5 days/week and got a puppy 3 weeks ago- what was I thinking?

The kids will not leave the dog alone. I'm either yelling at them or the dog almost constantly. She (the dog) has 'nipped' at all of them at one point or another and in reality it's been because they will. not. leave. her. alone. I've had to put her into her crate so much. DH and I were childless on Sunday and the dog was fine - normal puppy stuff but nothing major as soon as the kids were back it was horrible. DD2 'hugs' her throat tight, pushes her hand into the dog's mouth, has hit her, etc. DS just annoys her in any way that he can - which seems to be his goal in everything lately. DD1 just loves her and seems to think that she can control the dog's ever thought and move. I feel totally stressed and have no patience for the kids. Does anyone have some insight or words of wisdom? I just want to run away or put the kids in the crate which is generally frowned upon (joking of course).

I wanted to add that I

this puppy she is wonderful and since I've been waiting for her for about 11 years much wanted.

 

[dawn1221]

I just got a puppy a week ago Friday myself. He is 9 weeks old. Then the following Monday DD and I were in a car accident. I was hurt (neck and back) but DD was not.

So I have been feeling the same way you are. I feel like I am constantly yelling at DD to leave the dog alone. All the while trying to train the puppy and keep him from soiling my carpet or eating my entire house. I am struggling too.

I would say try to set some rules for the kids about how to behave with the dog. Then prepare yourself to remind them constantly. If you have a partner, enlist their help to give you a break from being the referee. My DH has been left in charge when I just have had enough and need to decompress from the stress.

You might try having the kids play in their rooms or outside when it gets too rowdy.

One thing to beware of is the kids might start getting jealous of the dog. Mine has been doing this and it is making things harder. I really have to be careful about how much attention I am giving DD right now because she is feeling a little left out because the puppy has so many needs.

I have been using the crate to take breaks too. Just be sure to take your puppy out for some serious playtime often. They need to sleep alot anyway.

 

[dawn1221]

BTW, my DD is 2.5 as well. I feel your pain!!!

 

[boricuaqueen327]

We obtained a puppy from the Humane Society and she is about 9 weeks old. I am having similar issues with dd who is 4 years old. She constantly wants to pick her up, hold, her, etc. I am just keeping the puppy tethered to me or in a crate when i can't supervise.

 

[LeahBoo]

Can you make a "don't hold the puppy" rule? Or no hugging, or such. When my sister got foster kids, they loved her dog but he was leary of them at first. The rule was, don't pet him (or touch, hug, follow him around) unless he comes up to you first. It worked. And the kids were pretty little even, 2 and 3.

 

[phatchristy]

With our cats we have a "no handling rule", and I'm extremely consistent with it. It works for us, but if I was having issues I would definitely do what I had to do to keep them separated. Whether it was baby gating certain areas, confining the dog to a crate/room temporarily. I am not a dog person, so perhaps some of the dog experts will come forth and write what they suggest.

 

[Rhiannon Feimorgan]

Do you have space to set up a "puppy area" where she can have a bit more room than the kennel but where there are clear boundries and the kids can't get at her? Maybe one room that is the dog room no kids alowed or a play yard fence. It's hard. Dd is 3 and ds is 8. When we first brought Nelly home it was the same way. Dd would lay down on the floor and then scream bloody murder if the puppy climbed on top of her which of course she would. Or the two of them would fight over who's turn it was to cuddle her meanwhile she's getting squeezed and pulled on. I felt like i was always giving someone heck.

It's much better now.

 

[hopeandolive]

I am no puppy expert by any means as I have mostly adopted adult dogs and the puppies I did have I got when there were no kids in the picture.

My 2 cents would be that the children are for sure old enough to understand and respect rules and boundaries. So set some. Use pictures if you have to, but set up a chart and show them "proper" puppy handling techniques and "improper". Have set "play times", enlist the kids in training (sit, down, stay etc) give everyone a specific task that they are allowed to work on each day with the pup (don't do too much at once or it will for sure confuse the pup). Have them help you clean up the poop messes etc (older kids obviously...the younger ones might make a bigger mess!). Explain to them that having a puppy around is fun, but also work. Make sure the pup has an area "OFF LIMITS" to the kids and vice versa. The kids also should have spaces the pup can't go (their bedrooms for example).

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time, but there is an adjustment period. I'm betting soon the kids will tire of the "novelty" of the new pup and it won't be the focus all of the time.

I wish I could suggest some books on the subject, but I don't know of any. Maybe do a search on Amazon or something? Good luck!

 

[Kirsten]

The no-kill shelter that we love and adore and adopt all our cats (four over the 17 years of our marriage) from has a strict "no kids under 6" rule for dog adoption. My kids are now 12, 8 and 5 - so one year to go!

I'd make some really strict rules about how they may treat the dog. With the youngest one, this may be hard. But you can't blame the dog for protecting itself if it is getting hit, choked, etc.

Baby gates to keep the dog and youngest child apart when you can't be right there to supervise?