I don't want to wean, but....

637 Views 12 Replies 9 Participants Last post by Parker'smommy, Jun 15, 2004

thedevinemissm

Discussion Starter · Jun 14, 2004

Hi! I'm mommy to 14mo DS. I am also 16wks pg. I truly do not want to wean DS, but I'm needing a reprieve.

DS took to nursing like a pro (yeah!). His first month it was every hour, even at night. Every two hours thru the time that he was 3 mo. Then he cut down to about every 3-4 hrs. (I wasn't scheduling it ~ he just sort of fell into his own little pattern) He had nothing but the breast until 6mo. He mostly "played" with the concept of solid food until he was 9mo. All great with me!

Now he eats 3 full meals + snacks daily. However, he doesn't really "drink" anything else. Plays with a few sips of water daily. He still nurses quite often (I'm not counting the few minutes after a boo-boo here), prob every 4hrs. He also still nurses 3+ times at night. Also keep in mind that he will often spend 30+min at the breast. When nursing to sleep (naps/night) he will nurse down both breasts.

I'm not trying to be whiney or "push" DS off the breast. I've tried the "don't offer/don't refuse" tactic ~ but DS asks that often to nurse. If I offer more water to him during the day, would he nurse less often? Is it bad to try to prevent so many "thirsty" nursings?

Are there any other ways that I can "trim" the number of nursings he wants each day? I'm honestly feeling smothered right now. I don't want to resent DS, I want to find a happy balance. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

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soccerchic21

· #2 · Jun 14, 2004

When does your milk usually dry up during pregnancy? I am not really familiar with all of that but would he get really upset if all of a sudden there wasn't anymore. Maybe that would be traumatic? I really don't know though. So it might be a good idea to slowly wean.

I am going to watch this thread and see replies so I can get educated. DD nurses an awful lot during the day as well she is almost 1 and DH and I are talking about having another baby and I was wondering about milk and new babies and nursing toddlers.

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jadegirl553

· #3 · Jun 14, 2004

I don't have any advice, I just wanted to let you know that your feelings are understandable- I think I'd feel the same way.

I'm sure that whatever you decide, you will do it with love, and I don't think you should feel guilty or "play the martyr" no matter what you decide!

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sohj

· #4 · Jun 14, 2004

I've heard that as the quality and taste of the milk changes when you get pregnant, a lot of toddlers will reduce or quit nursing on their own.

I haven't gone through that, so I can't be more specific. Maybe someone will weigh in on that?

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thedevinemissm

Discussion Starter · #5 · Jun 14, 2004

soccerchic21 said:
When does your milk usually dry up during pregnancy? I am not really familiar with all of that but would he get really upset if all of a sudden there wasn't anymore. QUOTE]

The Sears book I have says that usually during the third trimester the milk "turns back" into Colostrum (sp?) for the new baby. It says that some toddlers will wean permanantly, some will wean until the "good milk" comes back, & some don't seem to care at all.

I'm fully preparing to be a tandem nursing mama. Knowing my little guy, I don't think he'd care if it were rotten egg slime coming out of my breasts

:

Honestly, I don't want to wean ~ I just want nursings a little further apart.

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ldsapmom

· #6 · Jun 15, 2004

(((hugs))) mama, you sound tired! When I got pregnant with my second, my first was 17 months. You sound like you are being respectful to your son. The first nursing I had to cut out was the nighttime! My guy was a bit older, but once I hit about 6 months I could not take it anymore. We worked hard at it, but I think he understood, and I did not limit him any other time during the day, I focused on the night, because I needed my sleep!

Mine never stopped, never let up -- nothing ever changed, it was like my milk never changed at all, although I know it did.

I just wrote an essay about my epxeriences in this area, would you feel comfortable if I pm'd it to you? It might help with your perspective.

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soccerchic21

· #7 · Jun 15, 2004

Quote:

Originally Posted by thedevinemissm
I'm fully preparing to be a tandem nursing mama. Knowing my little guy, I don't think he'd care if it were rotten egg slime coming out of my breasts

:

Honestly, I don't want to wean ~ I just want nursings a little further apart.

:LOL sounds like my girl.

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thedevinemissm

Discussion Starter · #8 · Jun 15, 2004

I don't know what PM is? But if you can tell me how to get it ~ sure I'm up for anything!!!

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williamsmommy2002

· #9 · Jun 15, 2004

Pm is private message.

I am 36weeks pregnant with a ds that is 19months. He still nurses a lot. It did slow down around 20 weeks because my milk supply slowed down. A lot of times I could get him to drink something else because that's what he really wanted. At one time I thought he was going to wean and that made me sad because I felt responsible. After that, I finally started to kind of enjoy him nursing again. It is very hard to nurse through a pregnancy. I try distraction if i'm feeling irritated. If he's easily distracted then I don't feel bad. I don't do this all the time because my goal is not weaning, just when I need a break. I also try to rest as much as possible. When i'm well rested, I get less irritated also.

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Peppamint

· #10 · Jun 15, 2004

Hi there! My suggestion would be to offer a sip cup of water anytime you're touched out. It won't hurt him to drink a bit of water and it may give you an occassional break. It would be much better for him to drink a bit of water sometimes than to be weaned.

My dd weaned at 20mo when I was 2mo pregnant with my ds, so I don't have a whole lot of experience nursing while pregnant.

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ldsapmom

· #11 · Jun 15, 2004

I sent you a pm -- hope you find it

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bec

· #12 · Jun 15, 2004

I would have a sippy of water around at all times. I know my dd1 usually insists on having a variety of drinks available to her (water, milk, juice).

When I was newly pregnant, I was exhausted and my nipples were incredibly sore and sensitive. What helped us was night-weaning. It didn't mean that dd1 slept any better, but it did mean that dh could help out, and I wasn't being constantly woken up by the nursing.

I am still nursing dd1 and pumping for dd2. I believe the night weaning is what made it possible for me to continue with my sanity intact.

Bec

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Parker'smommy

· #13 · Jun 15, 2004

Im 7 weeks pregnant and talked to my LLL leader about what to expect in terms of when the nipple pain would subside and when my milk supply would drop and what to expect with that.

SHe told me to hold my breast tight so that movement was less when nursing to help hinder nipple pain.Gotta love those toddler nursing olympics!!! She said some women only have the pain the first trimester, some have pain the entire pregnancy.

She told me that around 4 months my milk supply would wane and my ds might wean then because he would be unhappy with flow, quanity, and the taste sometimes also changes, and he might not like that either. SHe also told me that some toddlers are happy to nurse throughout the pregnancy without any milk as they are big comfort nursers.

I'm also trying to work through the pain and I'm gonna try and take it one day at a time. My ds is 27 months old so he definitely has ideas of what he wants to do in terms of nursing. THe kid is definitely addicted!!!LOL!!

Good luck to you!

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