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we've told family and a few friends, but I have been keeping pretty mum at school. I had a concert tuesday night, and when I got there for the sound check our bass player said I was breathing heavy and asked if I had just run up the stairs. I said I was just sorta feeling like puking. He asked why and I kind of babbled and said I'd been feeling that way for a couple of days. He said why, are you preggers? So I said yes. He congratulated me, and I was totally ok with him knowing. I didn't mention that I really hadn't told anyone, my mistake.

So when it's time to perform we do our first tune, it goes fine, and then right before the second tune he calls out that congratulations are in order because one of us is going to have a little baby and it's obvious who (I'm the only girl). The audience included most of my teachers and a good number of my classmates. I was embarrassed and just put my hand over my face. I was shaking so bad I played terribly on the second tune. Afterwards I kinda felt like crying. I wasn't terribly averse to people knowing but it would have been nice to tell people on my own terms. I don't want a lot of attention for it and I'm afraid I'm now going to be known as "that pregnant girl" instead of by my name. It was bound to happen, but I probably could've had a few more weeks with the news to myself. I'm already weird enough as a female in the jazz department. I'm also afraid that people are going to see me as less committed or think that I was just going to school until I could get pregnant. I'm happy to be pregnant but this baby was a real surprise and I really did want to graduate next year!

The upside is, I started a heavy bout of nausea Tuesday night after I got home and haven't been able to go to school at all. I've emailed teachers regarding tests I'm missing and such and now that they all know why I'm so sick I'm not having any trouble getting any leniency. I probably would've told my teachers anyway now that I'm sick, but again, I would have preferred getting to do it.

Bass player was really apologetic when I told him that up until he spilled the beans he and I were the only ones in the room that knew. I was surprised at how emotional I felt about it, but I guess I can chalk that up to the hormones.
 

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That really sucks. I'm sorry he did that. Some ppl are so clueless. My parents outed me to my brother, who I was planning to tell on my own. Nowhere as bad as your situation, but it always stinks for ppl know stuff before you are ready to announce it.
 
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