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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Ok, I admit it. I used to be an addict of Super Mario and Tetris, and later on of computer games like Civilisations and Dune. But that was then, and those games weren't all about disembowling someone or racing a car really fast. My SS and my DH play everyday. EVERY. DAY. And they don't play those cutsy little games. They play noisy racing games, war games, shoot'em up games, zombie games. DH used to limit which games SS could watch and play, but now it's just free-for-all. And honestly, I know it sound hypocritical considering my previous infatution with games, videogames now drive me NUTS! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br><br>
As soon as DH wakes up in the morning, he turns on the X-Box or the PS2. It's how he wakes up. When he's bored, he plays. When he's depressed, he plays. And this makes it really hard for SS to get the message that it's ok for him to do kid stuff, like playing in his room, or reading books, or doing crafts.<br><br>
I have to admit that we have established a system where SS only gets to play in the mornings after he's gotten completely ready to walk out the door. Also, he has to "pay back" the time he plays with reading, guitar practice or free-learning. So he gets to play video games as much as he gets to do other things. But still, the ultimate reward for him is video games. It really worries me as he grows into a teenager.
 

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I can tell you my experience. My SS is allowed to play video games as much as he wants at his home with his mother/step father and siblings. He's 15, his siblings are much, much younger. He spends a LOT of time on the computer, playing vidoe games etc... at his other house.<br><br>
I hate video games - especially violent ones. I had a rule that there would be no violent video games in the house. That worked just great until SS got older because DH wasn't interested in the fun little racing games. But, as SS got older, DH got more and more lax and started letting him play video games non stop and allowed violent games in the house.<br><br>
I have a huge problem with it but he's not my son. I have ranted, raved, pleaded etc... all to no avail. It takes so much time away from the family, our girls never get to see him because even when he's here, he's in his room playing video games.<br><br>
Well, here we are with a now 15 yo who has always been allowed to play violent video games at his other house, has recently been allowed to play them at our house, has no limits on how much he can play and guess what? He's a mindless idiot. I know, that's terrible but it's true. He does lousy in school, he's constantly on the verge of failing, he has absolutely not one single outside interest, participates in NOTHING - is a lazy, boring kid. Oh and the kicker, his parent's can't seem to figure out why he's lazy, does poorly in school etc... If you expect nothing of a child, they'll rise to your level of expectation.<br><br>
I really started noticing a huge problem this summer - he was addicted to a game called Maple Story - he would create the online worlds - it really changed the way he interacted with the family.<br><br>
Anyway, all I can say is that you must get a grip on this now. I know it's your SS and that's a sticy sitaution if your DH isn't on board but seriously, nothing good can come from violent videogames and children.
 

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Well.. we love video games here. All types of them. Dh and I, and all the kids play and we love to spend time as a family playing. My 9 yo has never had a problem in school or turned into a drone because of it. She gets straight A's, and is in the gifted program for both reading and math. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"> So I really don't believe that video games alter the course for children that drastically that they can turn a child into a pile of mush.<br><br>
Of course, every family has their preference. If you don't like them, don't have them in your house. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"> Or come to some agreement with your dh about the types of games you want in the house. For instance, the only rule we really follow is that very bloody games, or those with a Mature rating for sexual content (like Grand Theft Auto) be played at night after the kids are in bed. Other than that, we rate them ourselves and decide if they are okay for the kids to play or watch.<br><br>
So I disagree that nothing good can come from it. And I disagree with the thinking that video gaming creates boring, mindless children. Its a bit of a stereotypical assumption.
 

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The statement was that nothing good can come from <i>violent</i> videogames. You think something good can come from violent games?<br><br>
And, just to be clear, you think it's ok that children play violent, shooting, killing video games? Because if I'm understanding correctly, that's primarily the OP's issue. I hear that she's worried that he's playing games too much but also, it's the type of games they're playing.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>amcal</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9939014"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">The statement was that nothing good can come from <i>violent</i> videogames. You think something good can come from violent games?<br><br>
And, just to be clear, you think it's ok that children play violent, shooting, killing video games? Because if I'm understanding correctly, that's primarily the OP's issue. I hear that she's worried that he's playing games too much but also, it's the type of games they're playing.</div>
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Most of the games we play could be called violent. Even fantasy based games are violent. Does it matter if its a gun or a sword really? Personally my issue is how the violence is shown rather than just the violence itself. Extreemly gory, bloody, severed limbs, etc. are games for after they are in bed. But yes, they do play "violent" games. We've played MMO's for years, and even ones with cutsey characters and things, usually have quite a bit of dragon slaying in them like in World of Warcraft or Everquest. Heck even Mario is violent. He isn't exactly shooting things with love petals, they're fire balls. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
Of course we love games that don't have any violence in them too like Animal Crossing, Nintendogs, and SimCity. No, scatch that.. SimCity is violent too. Really, most games will be objectionable to someone for something. Crude humor, sexual content, language, graphic gore, violence,.. its a very personal choice.<br><br>
What I don't believe in is painting all video games or children with the same brush.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thank you all for your input. If anything, it helps to know that there are other pp out there who struggle a bit with the same issue.
 

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Oh boy I am with you. Now I'll admit that I do have found enjoyment from VG and not all of them are bad, but overall I am not crazy about them. DS's dad is crazy about them though, and although DS has clearly taken an interest to the controllers and such we've agreed that when he is old enough to play that the time will be limited and that the game with be rated G . . . well actually I think that it is rated E (for everyone?) but you know what I mean. That is the plan anyway, it is going to be hard to have DP give up unpleasant games (thankfully he doesn't have many) and even harder to explain to him that he has to set an example for DS and limit his own time with the games. Maybe by then though he will be less interested in them all together.
 
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