Mothering Forum banner
1 - 19 of 19 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,337 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am near tears right now, b/c I just don't know what to do. Had my appt today at 11:45. The m/w walks in the room and realizes who she's about to see, and says "Oh God!". I said, "Oh God is right!" She looked very sheepish. That was the funny part. The not so funny part is she'd like me to have an u/s to check amniotic fluid level and a non stress test, both on Thursday. That is also the last day she will be on call before her mini-vacation. She will be off Friday through next Wednesday. I agreed to the testing as long as they don't check weight, b/c I know how innaccurate that is. She will be at the hospital on Thursday anyway, since she's on call, and dangled the option of breaking my water while I was there. We already know from past experience that it works for me, she said it would be easy as pie, break the water, walk the halls 3 times, hop in the tub, have a baby 3 hours later. If I wasn't planning the UC I would probably have agreed right then and there. That is what I have to decide. I don't know what I want to do. I am so miserable, I am 6 days overdue today, and I am so dilated that she couldn't even strip my membranes. It was just too wide. So I have two days to decide if I want to get this over with, or take the chance that I go into labor and have the baby at home or take the risk of needing to transfer to the hospital and end up with the med-wife of the practice (who is on call tomorrow, I might add). I know none of you can make this decision for me, but please, tell me what you think you would do in my situation. I just need to hear what others would do. DH is supportive of me no matter what I choose, so it's all on my shoulders. Help me, please!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
183 Posts
So sorry to hear about your stress and worries. I am not in your situation yet, but am facing a similar one as my provider heads for a 10 day vacation this friday - two days before my due date. This will leave us with the midwives (who knows who we'll get) from whom we've never received care and who are unable to be as flexible as our physician (a naturopath as well) regarding hospital procedures, etc. I was feeling the pressure to get the birth underway as well and then my DH reminded me that who is there is not that important. it's more important to trust babies' timing than to force it in order to have someone we like catch the baby. It helped me calm down a bit and just realize that it might not be the total birth story I envision, but it will be baby's perfect story nonetheless. With you being so dilated, sounds like you're about to have the baby any day now anyway. BUt stress CAN slow down labor. Might be more important to let it go and relax. Go get a prenatal massage....you'll probably go into labor a few hours after that!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,337 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I've already been this dilated for several weeks, and the same thing happened with DD. My water was artificially ruptured with her, so I don't know what it's like to go into labor. I am 6 days overdue, and I have no idea if I will have the baby tonight or two weeks from now. I am miserable and uncomfortable, and it is so tempting to just break my water and get this overwith. I just don't know what to do.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
563 Posts
If you are planning a UC do you need your midwife to be around? Sounds like you could just chance having her away since you likely won't be seeing her anyways.
So sorry for the tough decision though! I am only due today and going crazy, I don't even think I am dialated. I would pretty stressed if I were in your situation. Have you tried natural inducers?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,337 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
No, that's the thing. This is a CNM that I was seeing for backup care, she doesn't even know about my UC plans. She delivered my daughter and I love her, but she doesn't do homebirths. My dilemma is with being almost a week overdue and just wanting to have this baby. She has given me a way out. She suggested Castor oil and the cohoshes, the cohoshes scare me and castor oil, I'm not too sure about. I haven't fully decided on those. I have tried everything else under the sun to get things going and nothing is working.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,798 Posts
Try not to focus on how miserable you are right now - keep the big picture in mind. Six months from now, what is the memory that you'd like to reflect on? Will you regret not having your UC? Will you regret missing your opportunity to birth with your CNM?

I encourage you to spend time over the next two days meditating on your options. Explore your feelings and go with your gut!

Good luck to you!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,193 Posts
I'd hang in there a little while longer. My son was 10 days "overdue" when they induced, and it is to my eternal regret that I didn't just let myself go into labor with him. I wanted to experience labor naturally, YK?

And with you wanting to have a UC to add to that-- it just doesn't seem worth it to possibly lose the UC when waiting a few more days might have done the trick.

If she does break your water, and you DON'T go into labor, you may find yourself between a rock and a hard place, trying to avoid further intervention while avoiding infection.

Can you tell yourself to wait another two days? I know the idea of TWO WEEKS is overwhelming, but two days might be easier to handle, psychologically.

Hugs!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,398 Posts
I don't think I would use any of the cohoshes to induce labour. Once you're in labour already, the correct one for you should be fine to use, but to induce...not me.

And if you were "overdue" with your first as well, then you're likely not really overdue. Babies just stay in a little longer with you! You seem so close, I'd wait it out and not risk any intervention which could have you ending up at the hospital, which is not where you want to be!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
316 Posts
It would be so hard to have your back up mw gone for your birth! I had a slightly similiar situation. Two weeks b4 my baby was born my friend who had been at both my previous births was in town for a week. I wanted so badly to have this baby while she was here but it didn't work out.

Also,I was about as overdue as you were a few days ago and my midwife handed me a bottle of cohash herb before she left my house for my prenatal appointment. I was so shocked and tempted. I decided not to take it and did not feel my baby was in any danger that required speeding things along. Two days later my son was born. I am so glad I did wait because even though I was "overdue" (corect lmp date) my baby was covered in vernix and was more like a week early. I am glad I let him stay in there and develop and his timing or rather the Lord's timing was perfect- a beautiful Sunday morning an hour or so before the kid's got up (a huge blessing for my superfast 3 hr birth!) Just lovely.
Your in my prayers
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
19,261 Posts

I am not in your DDC, but wanted to give you a hug.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,337 Posts
Discussion Starter · #11 ·
My first was not overdue, I was induced early. I had gallstones, was a first time mom and wanted to be done. I was induced at 38 weeks, 5 days. By my lmp my due date was three weeks ago, by u/s it was one week ago, so I am inclined to think that this child is indeed "overdue". I will sleep on this decision.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,398 Posts
Ah okay, sorry I misunderstood. Do you know when you ovulated and how long your cycles are? You'd be able to figure out a better "due date" that way. Personally, I take the lmp and ultrasound dates with a grain of salt. In most cases, baby comes when its ready and there isn't an "overdue". The tests you are getting will obviously help to make sure babe is okay, so could you wait on the decision until those results come back?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,337 Posts
Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by TechnoGranola
Ah okay, sorry I misunderstood. Do you know when you ovulated and how long your cycles are? You'd be able to figure out a better "due date" that way. Personally, I take the lmp and ultrasound dates with a grain of salt. In most cases, baby comes when its ready and there isn't an "overdue". The tests you are getting will obviously help to make sure babe is okay, so could you wait on the decision until those results come back?
I can't wait, if I want this midwife to deliver my baby, it would have to be Thursday, otherwise she will be on vacation until next Wednesday. I don't know for sure cycles and ovulation b/c I am still bfing and my cycles were just getting into a routine when I got pg again. It was something like 45 days or something, and when it didn't show, I tested, got a faint positive, etc. I had an u/s at 7 weeks.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,013 Posts
I wish you energy from the earth mother and please take some alone meditative time to process your feelings. You may already have the answer.
I say forget the midwife and follow your dreams. And I would break my own water at home before anything else. Trust in your path and your childs arrival...It will come and all you can do is go with your instinct. That isn't always the natural way IMO. Mama knows best! Love and Blessings to you!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,398 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by boobyfeeder
I can't wait, if I want this midwife to deliver my baby, it would have to be Thursday, otherwise she will be on vacation until next Wednesday. I don't know for sure cycles and ovulation b/c I am still bfing and my cycles were just getting into a routine when I got pg again. It was something like 45 days or something, and when it didn't show, I tested, got a faint positive, etc. I had an u/s at 7 weeks.
Now I really see why this is so difficult for you! You said you are planning a UC? If that's the case, then having any intervention may be setting you up to have to use a midwife. Chances are things will go just grand and you won't need the midwife, so I'd let nature take its course. But that's me...I hate to fiddle with the natural course of things!

Hugs to you mama and whatever you decide be confident!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
620 Posts
What do you think would be best for the baby at this point? That's what I would want to consider. If you are 1-3 wks past the "due date" I think it might be best to birth the baby sooner rather than later.
I wish you the best and remember that a healthy baby is the #1 goal--not the time, place, or who attended the birth. Those things would be great to have the way you'd like--personally I haven't been so lucky but I have 2 beautiful, healthy babies and that's all that matter to me!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,963 Posts
That's a really tough decision. I think I'd wait and UC personally, but seeing that you're soo dilated already, breaking your water sounds really tempting. I guess you've just got to go with your gut.
 
1 - 19 of 19 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top