[Rollermommy]

I think I have found a really good solution to my "evil mother" syndrom that I have been experiencing. To some of you this may be a "well duh", and to others it may seem to simple to actually work, but I swear, IT WORKS! I'm not a christian, but I do believe in a "higher power" so to speak, so we'll call it "God" just because that's what most people are familiar with. Every morning I've been getting up before my kids to have time to myself before i have to do anything for anyone--and yes i have to get up at 5:30 to do this but its worth it to me. Anyway, i sit on my porch and have a cup of joe, and a morning prayer. Here is how it goes (not verbatim but you get the picture):
Dear God, thank you for the blessing of this day, and thank you for giving me the opportunity to be a mother and a wife. Today i have the chance to be the best mother i can be, and to show my children unconditional love and kindness. Please help me to do my very best. Help me to get a clear picture of the kind of mother i want to be, and strive to be that. Help me to control my temper and my words, and help me to give every action thought and act with intention and awareness. Help me to let go of the small things and focus my attention on what's really important. Thank you.

I dont just say this without thought, these are heartfelt prayers. And I keep them in mind ALL DAY LONG. That's the trick. So when i about to scream, cleaning up the 5th glass of spilled juice, I think back to this prayer. When all i want to do is watch oprah and the kids are begging to go to the park, I think about this prayer. Anyways, I know this is simple, but if you guys have a prayer, or a mantra, poem, saying, whatever, I would really love to hear them. Maybe we could print these out and put them around the house as a reminder. Thanks for letting me share

 

[CortLong]

That's soo good you've found such a neat solution.

 

[MaShroom]

amen sista!

i usually find some sort of peace in kind of the same way. for me though, it is more like meditation. i go sit on my comfy glider at a time when there is nobody else around, have a cuppa whatever and let all of the yuck just melt away. either very early in the a.m. or sometimes in the night i'll go sit by our fire pit, watch the embers burn out and listen to the owls. i talk to the moon. pretty captive audience.

i am so much more grounded than i was even a year ago. space like that, prayer and meditation are just good for the soul.

 

[feebeeglee]

Remember, whatever it is, it may all be peaceful again in 2 minutes. That gets me thru the day

 

[applejuice]

I was the oldest of nine children - the second mommy.

I made the breakfast and lunch every morning from the time I was eight years old and I made dinner and cleaned the dishes until the day I graqduated from college and married and left at age twenty-three. I had my first baby at age twenty-six and I felt alot of burn-out immediately.

I had profound post partum depression with my first three children who were all born within four years. Whe #3 was 2 years old, I finally made a declaration to myself similar to what you pray each morning and I kept it at the front of my consciousness each day. It lifted my spirits. I cleaned up my attitiude and I was a different mama!

My parents were undergoing the worst divorce experience I ever saw in my life and I have had a front row seat to many divorces. I just decided that my children deserved the best, and that it was my duty to give that to them.

 

[applejuice]

Good luck Gaiamama -

You are on your way! G-d bless you!

 

[Peppermint]

I do similar, and should make a conscious effort to do it more often. My main problem is that I am exhausted, so at naptime, I fall asleep with the kids (even if that isn't my intention, I just can't seem to help it) and at night, I often fall asleep putting dd to sleep, and if I don't I really try to spend that time with dh, so I rarely have any *quiet* "me" time.

One thing that I do is instead of "counting to 10" when I start to lose it, I say a Hail Mary, it reminds me of what i should strive to be as a mother, and I ask for her help in making me the mother my kids need, I try to think of how she would handle things if she were in my shoes.

It does sound simple, but sometimes the best things are!