I just freaked out my DH - concerning our homebirth!

471 Views 10 Replies 8 Participants Last post by Mamabeakley, Apr 2, 2006

Mom2Adam

Discussion Starter · Mar 30, 2006

So, Dh has been completely into a homebirth. We were at his sister's homebirth 2 yrs ago and it was a wonderful experience.

DH asked me to tell him (again) how insurance paid the midwife. So I explained and he said "Wow, that must really not be worth it...I mean how many births a month does she do - 3 or 4? How can that be profitable." and I say...

"Well I don't think she is really worried about profit, but despite that, she does more like 10 births a month." UH OH.

DH's eyes bugged out

: "That means about 2.5 a week! That means there is a good chance she will have another birth during ours!"

We are an hour away from the midwife and this hasn't concerned me a bit. I know lots of momma's that have birthed with this midwife (and yes, I know one where she didn't make it!). Still it freaked Dh out. I told him we just have to be prepared for a UC....that really freaked him out. We go together to talk to midwife about birth plans next week, hopefully she will help reassure him!

Something else I didn't think to tell him is that I don't know how many of those 10 are home and how many are hospital. That makes a difference I am sure....

Just thought I would share....when will I learn to watch what I say.

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nova22

· #2 · Mar 30, 2006

LOL, poor guy

BTW if you don't mind me asking, where in VA are you? We live in Virginia too and have never found a midwife in our area, they are all over an hour away.

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Peppamint

· #3 · Mar 30, 2006

LOL... it could happen! Does she have an assistant? And I would imagine the hospital births are less time consuming since she has nurses to assist and doesn't have to drive to the moms, they drive to her!

We're getting closer....

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gnutter

· #4 · Mar 30, 2006

THis is our 2nd homebirth and my MW knows how freaked out Dh can get. She gave me the paper for emergency childbirth-you know what to do if the MW doesn't make it. LOL! She said this is for george---He so wnated nothing to do with that piece of paper-I am going to tape it by the bed here in afew weeks just to mean

I figure he dserves a ilttle bit of stress since I am the one having the baby. He assured me though that he had every confidence that if the MW didn't make it that I should have no problem doing it myself. I was like "gee thanks"

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mamacatsbaby

· #5 · Mar 31, 2006

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mom2Adam
Just thought I would share....when will I learn to watch what I say.

Quote:

Originally Posted by gnutter
He so wnated nothing to do with that piece of paper-I am going to tape it by the bed here in afew weeks just to mean

Oops, I mean, I'm very disappointed in you mama...

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Mom2Adam

Discussion Starter · #6 · Mar 31, 2006

Nova22 - We are about an hour outside of Richmond (out in da' country). We moved out here from Richmond Surrounding area almost 2 yrs ago, peace and tranquility and that's about all! We are using the only HB midwife in Richmond (she is AWESOME). You must be in SE Va?

BBM - She does not have an assistant! However we have asked SIL to come hang out with DS and SIL has had 2 HB's so...I would feel okay having her here too!

Gnutter - I am afraid to "tease" DH! I want him to be comfortable, nothing like worrying about him while I am preparing for baby! LOL.

We haven't really had a chance to talk about this yet. Maybe this weekend (it's hard getting a chance to talk with an INTENSE almost 3 yr old!). Ahhhhh......what am I thinking, having a baby! LOL.

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eco_mama

· #7 · Mar 31, 2006

I used to live in VA as well. In FXBG.

You should ask her how many mama's she has due in the same month as you. My mw only has 2 due in May. Me and someone else. She also has 2 assistants.

Good Luck!!

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NYCVeg

· #8 · Mar 31, 2006

I might also ask her how many times she's missed a birth due to having another one. If the number is very low (or non-existent), share it with him--it might make him feel better.

My mw practice is 5 mws, and they take 25 births a month--so 10 for an individual does actually seem pretty high to me! They do both homebirths and birth center births--they said that it's only happened once (in over 15 years) that there were 3 people giving birth at the birth center at the same time...and they only have two birthing rooms! So some poor mama gave birth in the upstairs waiting room (which does have a couch and some comfy stuff, but isn't nearly as nice as the birthing rooms). I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that that doesn't happen to me.

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Peppamint

· #9 · Mar 31, 2006

Hmm, I think my midwife only has one other mama due in May IIRC!

She's keeping her practice pretty small these days...

If the birth goes so fast she doesn't get here in time, no worries there (for me) because that generally means everything is going EXTREMELY well.

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gnutter

· #10 · Apr 1, 2006

I wouldn't tease him if we hadn't been through this homebirth thing before.

It is a valid concern-many women-homebirth and hospital birth haven't made it to there expected birth destination in time. If he is still concerned and you feel he needs some extra reassurance hiring a doula may help-they are usually familiar with childbirth and can help out in case of an unexpected speedy delivery. YOur midwife should be able to give you some reassurance though. Mine is pretty busy and hasn't missed a birth yet.

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Mamabeakley

· #11 · Apr 2, 2006

NYCVeg - They have had up to 5 *births* on one day, though - and it was an appointment day - they had to call in a "back-up" midwife to do appointments. I know b/c it was the day my CIL's baby was born . . ..

I think DH would love to go UC in some ways, so he's not scared of the midwives not getting there in time . . . on the other hand, the chances of that ever happening in my situation (same MWs as NYCVeg) are really low especially considering that my 1st labor was 22 hours.

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