[~Megan~]

dd will be Kindergarten age next year and its causing me so much anxiety.<br><br>
I feel like I <i>should</i> put her in public school, that it would be easier.<br><br>
There are two big things that hold me back from public school bullying/peer pressure and turning my child over to a stranger.<br><br>
These are big things to me but I'm not sure if they can't be overcome.<br><br>
I wonder if I am being ridiculous and over dramatic about these issues.<br><br>
With breastfeeding or natural birth or intactivism there is a clear answer. There is a medical answer, there is a logical answer. I feel like schooling is cloudy.<br><br>
Part of me feels like I should put my kids in public school so I could get back to work and contribute financially because we need it. But then again, I feel like that is not fair to my kids.<br><br>
I feel so anxious about this decision.<br><br>
Any empathy or words of advice?

 

[xanandali]

I understand your concerns. I sort of feel the same way at times, like for whatever reason I have the "obligation" not to let my kids down by homeschooling and not doing a good job. But then reality sets in and I realize that there is no better teacher for my kids than me and its not likely I'll mess them up too badly!<br><br>
What does your husband think about homeschooling? Are you in a position financially that you really need to go back to work full time or could you do something part time? These are major factors that I totally can relate to! If its possible for you to homeschool for kindergarten then see how it goes and go to public school later if you see its not feasible to do it at home. That's what I'd suggest and would guess most others will too. Good luck!!

 

[~Megan~]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>estirbunny</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7945558"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">What does your husband think about homeschooling?</div>
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He is very supportive and wants me to do it more than I want to do it.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">Are you in a position financially that you really need to go back to work full time or could you do something part time?</td>
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We need some extra money. I'm not sure what exactly I will do or can do. I was thinking more about working part time once both kids are in school (3+ yrs from now as long as we don't have more). While I'd like to get something right now I don't see if working till ds gets a little easier to handle and/or isn't nursing as much. That is unless the improbably happens and I can find a job I can do from home that actually nets money (unlike the gazillions of home businesses I've tried in the past).

 

[Dar]

So, what are your reasons for considering school next year? You've said you think you shouold, which doesn't seem like a very solid reason to me. You've talked about the "school as free childcare" bit, but that won't even come into play until your son is older.<br><br>
Rather than thinking of reasosn to homeschool, what would your reasons for schooling be? Homeschooling is pretty much what you're been doing all along - schooling would be making a change. Why change? What's no longer working?<br><br>
Dar

 

[~Megan~]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Dar</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7945779"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">"school as free childcare" What's no longer working?<br><br>
Dar</div>
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When you put it like that it sounds harsh but that is what it would be. You are right. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br>
Partly, it would be a break for me. ds and dd fight a lot. She has a difficult personality for me to deal with sometimes.<br><br>
We can't afford activities really so it would be a place for her to play with other kids more.<br><br>
And mostly, its just that public school is "normal" and expected.

 

[joandsarah77]

I would forget about what is normal and look at what each option provides for your family. Who wants to be normal anyway <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> Are you seen as normal now? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br>
I would make a pros and cons list for each. We can offer you some if you don't really know what they are yet. Also you have to remember your dd and ds will get older and the dynamics between them and between you and them will change.

 

[oceanbaby]

Much empathy. It was an agonizing decision for me (dh was totally on board with hs'ing) not to enroll ds1 in Kindergarten. Main reasons we wanted to hs were: Didn't feel it was healthy for him to be gone 30 hours a week at age 5; thought it would be stressful for him; wanted freedom as a family; wanted to avoid peer pressure and bullying; wanted to maintain his creativity and enthusiasm for learning, etc.<br><br>
The reasons against homeschooling were: Dealing with being different; feeling major anxiety about screwing it up; dealing with the fact that I won't be going back to work anytime soon; and the fact that ds is a very sociable little guy who does just fine with structure and would probably love a lot of things about school.<br><br>
We're at the end of our first year, and really the only downside has been the periodic panic attacks where I think that I must be completely out of my mind. But they don't last long. And, as dh likes to remind me, I'm sure there would be things about school that would be worrying me as well.<br><br>
As far as the sibling fighting, remember that that will not change just because she goes to school. Same with the difficult personality. It will just be on hold for a few hours a day. There are still the afternoons, evenings and weekends to deal with! And, I know that my ds is way more difficult to deal with after a full day when he's tired and a bit stressed from so much activity.<br><br>
My advice: Try it. If it's horrible, enroll her in school. I figured it was easier to recover from a bad year of homeschooling than a bad year of school, especially at such a young and tender age.

 

[Cullens_Girl]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>~Megan~</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7945816"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
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We can't afford activities really so it would be a place for her to play with other kids more.<br></div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">: this isn't an easy decision. One thing I wanted to point out is that the amount of time kids spend "playing" in school is getting less and less. Some schools have cut recess down to just 15 minutes a day. There were at least 3 articles that I saw in various magazines this month (Family Fun and Mothering to name two) about the importance of recess/outdoor play and that this need was not being met in many schools these days. This was one of our major reasons to homeschool. There are lots of free ways to get these needs met while not being in school. I suggest checking out a few local homeschooling groups and maybe attending a few social events with them to get a better feel for what you might experience in that respect.

 

[Citymomx3]

I spent a couple of years researching homeschooling before taking the plunge, so I know it's a hard decision. But it was the best thing we ever did.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">With breastfeeding or natural birth or intactivism there is a clear answer. There is a medical answer, there is a logical answer. I feel like schooling is cloudy.</td>
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">And mostly, its just that public school is "normal" and expected.</td>
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20-30 years ago breastfeeding, natural birth, and intactivism were the cloudy ones. Formula, drugged births, and circs were what was normal then. But families started following their gut rather than following the crowd and look how far we've come since then. Homeschooling has also come an incredibly long way. And studies are coming out all over the place how homeschoolers get better test scores, get sought out by top colleges, and are emotionally, socially, and mentally better adjusted to life.<br><br>
The main thing is to follow your heart. You could always put her in school if you feel it just isn't working. Good luck with your decision!