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My 4 1/2 year has a number of serious cavities. She got 2 teeth capped about 2 months ago at our private dentist, and she handled the appt. very well, so we decided to continue with trying to get the work done slowly, one tooth at a time, in the dentist chair, rather than put her under general anesthesia and get them all done at once.<br><br>
We did the first ones in the chair, because the waiting list for general anaethesia is very long here (our Cdn medical system) and her tooth was hurting her - so we paid the $ to get that tooth fixed at our regular private dentist.<br><br>
But we found out she was eligible for free dental care through the public health office, so we went there for the 2nd appt.<br><br>
Well, the first thing they did was ask me to sit in the hall, rather than in the treatment room ("less distraction for the child")! I was upset, but tried to be calm and give their method a chance. Well, 10 minutes later, I could hear dd crying, so I went it. They were giving her the needle for freezing - I don't think they used any pre-freezing before the needle, She was writhing around, and making sounds. I rubbed her legs. When they were finished the needle, she was still upset, but they continued right into trying to put the rubber dam on her teeth. I thought she just needed a moment to collect herself, so I asked dd if she wanted a hug. She said yes, so I gave her a quick hug, right in the chair. When we quit, dd was crying even louder. The dental therapist said "See, now you've made her even more upset" I said "yes she's upset, but she's also been through this once before, and knows what's coming".<br><br>
Therapist continued to tell her to stop making those noises. I was torn about what to do - even though I wanted the work done, my dh and I also didn't want her to have a bad experience with dentists. I knew what I wanted to do - to ask her if she wanted to nurse - but how could I do that here? I wished I had taught her a secret sign or code word. I finally decided I needed to do what was best for my child, even if they thought I was weird.<br><br>
So I asked dd if she wanted a hug or to nurse. I could FEEL the tension in the room when I said that (just as I could feel it when I walked back into the room). DD didn't say anything right away, she had been saying "I want to go to the children's festival" (we were going there after the appt). The therapist kept telling her she needed to get the work done before she could go. Finally dd said "okay" Therapist thought that meant that dd was ready to have the work done and moved toward her to start- but dd said "no I want to nurse!"<br><br>
Well the therapist said "that's it, I only have until 10 o-clock" and was quite mad. I just shot her a look and said "she's my child and I've know her for 4 years and know what she needs" and "don't talk about something you know nothing about". I took dd off the chair, sat her on my lap on a chair behind the therapist and assistant, pulled up my shirt and pulled down my bra, and she latched on. She nursed for about 20 seconds, and then I told her that was enough. She was satisfied and walked herself back to the chair, climbed up and never wimpered as they continued back on the work.<br><br>
I sat on a chair in the room, back away from them. Towards the end, dd was a little upset again, and just called to me "mom, can you come hold my hand" which I did.<br><br>
Of course, the therapist had to lecture me before we left, that if I was still nursing her to sleep, I must make sure I cleaned her mouth out before she slept (yah, right, how's that gonna happen?) I told that I sit on the Breastfeeding Committee for Canada and Saskatchewan, and was well read on the the subject, so I knew the risks involved.<br><br>
I doubt if we will go back there - I think I'd rather pay the fee at our rpivate dentist, and be treated with dignity. I feel sorry for the less assertive moms that have to be treated like that. I told the therapist that I thought being asked to sit in the hallway was very disrespectful to me and my daughter, and the relationship we had.<br><br>
I hope they noted how just a few seconds of nursing allowed my dd to get ahold of herself and calm her down. She felt her needs being acknowledged and respected. I know I can't expect people who have never known an older child who nursed, to understand how it works, but I wish health professionals would have a bit more respect for mothers, and that they know what their child needs.<br><br>
Janice
 

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hooray for you, mama! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"><br><br>
My heart went out to your dd as I read your post because I, as a 31 yr old woman, am terrifed of getting any dental work done! Good for you for not worrying about what other people thought and doing what you needed to do to help your dd feel comfortable and safe! and I can't believe they wanted you to wait in the hall! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/angry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="angry"> and then to lecture you! argh!
 

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good for you janice! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"><br><br>
how disrespecful of them. i am sorry you and your daughter were treated that way. i wouldn't be going back there either.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/clap.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="clap"> Good for you Mama!<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> to you and your dd. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I can't believe some of the things they said to you. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/angry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="angry">
 
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