[spmamma]

... today when my toddler bit me during a tantrum.

: Thank goodness my mind connected with what my hand was doing and so I could stop myself before I spanked her.

I was really shaken up by the whole thing. I can't believe my instincts had me doing that. Please tell me I'm not the only one this has happened to.

I'm really new to the whole GD thing. My folks spanked us sometimes when we were little, and while I'm not upset about it, DH and I decided a long time ago (even before DD was born) not to go that route.

What do you do when you find yourself faced with heightened (pregnant) mama emotions during a tantrum or when your child is hurting you? She's still so young - I know she wasn't trying to actually hurt me.

I just need some strategies to ensure I never go down that road. Any advice would be appreciated!

 

[Samhain Hunter]

Quote:

Originally Posted by spmamma I was really shaken up by the whole thing. I can't believe my instincts had me doing that. Please tell me I'm not the only one this has happened to.

It's perfectly natural. Look at nature. Look how our fellow mammals disapline their young. I myself always have an overwhelming urge to bite.

I control myself, but I'm not ashamed that I felt that way. You're not the only one at all. I actually did slap one of mine when the bit the nipple one time. I cried and cried about it (much more than my babe did!), but it happened in a split second. I didn't even have time to think about it. I also was never spanked as a child. I was an only child, and one of those oddly fantastic children, so I was never actually disaplined in any way. I never needed to be. Yet, I instinctively slapped one of my precious babies in response to being hurt. It's natural. You stopped yourself! You did great! And being pregnant with a toddler on your hands is a test and a half.

 

[Daphneduck]

I've had the urge to spank, even caught myself once as I was raising my hand. DD kicked me during a diaper change and I came so close to smacking her leg...

It's normal and even though you're a mom, you are still a human being. I know many non-spankers that have come close to it, and few that have actually lost it and spanked their dc. You are definitely not alone.

 

[SmoothieMom]

Don't feel bad, it was just an instinctive reaction. Great job in stopping yourself though, you should be very proud of yourself.

 

[spmamma]

Thanks mamas for sharing your experience with this. I felt so awful for even having the urge! It's so good to hear that it's just a normal reaction. I will definitely be more aware of it now, though, so I can work on making sure that I never follow through with it!

 

[just_lily]

I would be willing to bet that almost everyone has had this thought cross their mind at least once. It is human nature - fight or flight. And I bet that anyone who hasn't felt this way - well, their time is coming I am sure.

 

[mamabearsoblessed]

Aw Mama

. I've had that feeling too. It's the action that follows that matters.
I have had moments when I have turned away from my kids and walked away *clapping my hands*. I know it sounds odd but I've clapped many times while breathing deeply. We were spanked as kids too, and I think thats where my reaction comes from.
When we know better, we do better. But that doesn't mean there aren't glimpses of reactive (not neccesarily instinctive) impulse in there too.
I swear, try breathly deeply and clapping next time you feel that way~ it may help you like it has me

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