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I am so sorry mama! Parenting is so hard. I feel like I fail a lot. My son is very high energy, and I am due with my second in June. I am getting very anxious about how I am going to parent two kiddos at the same time. And I don't even have as much on my plate as you do. Just wanted to wish you well, you are doing your best, and that is all we can do.

Sending a hug your way.
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