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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
You're probably wondering why I'm not posting in the I'm pregnant board, I guess because I am not ready to completely accept it. I was hoping to wait another year before trying as my DS is only 16 months old, but we messed up. I knew we messed up before it even happened and I've convinced myself for a week and half now that we weren't going to get PG even thought I knew the chances were high.<br><br>
So, I took an HPT last week and it was neg. and I just took 2 this morning and they were both pos. but faint...not so faint that you aren't sure they are there though. Both DH and I know we weren't ready to be PG again so soon and I know it will be fine and we'll be happy, but I'm feeling a bit sad right now.<br><br>
I guess I just feel guilty b/c I wanted to spend more time with my son before I had to split it with another child. I don't think I'll love this baby any less but I guess I worry that I will feel differently. Does anyone know what I mean?<br><br>
And then I feel horrible for not feeling excited and thrilled. I feel bad for the growing baby b/c I don't feel excited and I feel bad b/c I know how many people in the world would feel ecstatic to be PG right now. I guess I am also just mad that I knew we shouldn't have had unprotected sex when we did but I let us do it anyway.<br><br>
I am just looking for some words of advice, wisdom, whatever. It looks like I'll be due 10/20/07 or so and my son will be 25 months old then. Not what I planned, but oh well.<br><br>
Thanks for listening. I know I'll feel happy and excited soon, I just wish it was now.<br><br>
Aubrie
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> i'm sorry this isn't what you wanted i don't really have any words of wisdom i just wanted to give you a hug and tell you it'll work out your son will be 2 and 2 years is a good age between children
 

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I saw your post on the main page and I think I do have some words that will make you feel better!<br><br>
My dds are 17 months apart. We were older when we had them so the timing was okay with us.<br><br>
What I really want to tell you is that *everyone* almost everyone who gets pg. w/#2 feels a little bit sad because it marks the ending of the special relationship you have had all this time with your first.<br><br>
First babies are special. No doubt. I felt sad too. And even a little resentful. Dd1 and I were so in love! I didn't want anything to disrupt that.<br><br>
It's hard to feel or understand until you experience it but you *will* be excited ( just as excited as you were the first time) and having 2 is sooo much fun. It's especially great to have them close in age (imo) because the bond they form is so strong.<br><br>
It'll be great! Congratulations!
 

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Congratulations!! Believe me you will come around! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I was in your same position a while ago(only we weren't going to have anymore) and I was sooo unhappy at first but once she started moving and my stomach started growing and I got past the morning sickness <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"> I was so in love! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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I was like that with #3, my first two are 15mnths apart and my 2and3rd are 12mnths apart. When I found out I was pregnant with her I was so freaked out, I can't even explain with words, I was in total shock. With her I ended up with tons of early problems and let me tell you that knocked me back into reality, all the sudden I wanted this baby more than anything, and felt so guilty about being less than excited at first. But its a normal reaction I think. This baby was concieved out of love and he or she will be another little light in your life. And its fun having them close, its so awesome to see them play and interact with eachother, oh it takes my breathe away. I think once you get past the total shock you'll be fine, and your not alone in your feelings, but it gets better. Congratulations on your new little one, its nice having a little unexpected excitement <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> !
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thank you, all for your kind words. It is a RELIEF to know that I am not the only one who has ever felt this way. I thought there was something wrong with me, but you're right, it's just normal. I am still in the "I wish this wasn't happening now" stage, but every once in a while I have a moment where I involuntarily smile at the thought of new life growing within me.<br><br>
I think once I give it a week to be 100% sure and we start telling people then we will feel better.<br><br>
Thanks so much!<br>
Aubrie
 

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OH, you're absolutely not alone. Exactly the same thing happened to me. We wanted to get pg with #2 when DS was 2 years old, but we got pg the month he turned 1. Shocker!! They are 21 months apart.<br><br>
You know, it is a little bit easier than I anticipated. I was prepared for utter and complete chaos! And sometimes it is, but overall I like it, and I love watching my DCs interact now. DD's face lights up and she smiles and squeals when she sees her brother. And DS lies next to DD on the floor and says, "I the big brother. Anna sister." So cute. I know they'll be great playmates!<br><br>
Have fun!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>AugustineM</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7270913"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">OH, you're absolutely not alone. Exactly the same thing happened to me. We wanted to get pg with #2 when DS was 2 years old, but we got pg the month he turned 1. Shocker!! They are 21 months apart.<br><br>
You know, it is a little bit easier than I anticipated. I was prepared for utter and complete chaos! And sometimes it is, but overall I like it, and I love watching my DCs interact now. DD's face lights up and she smiles and squeals when she sees her brother. And DS lies next to DD on the floor and says, "I the big brother. Anna sister." So cute. I know they'll be great playmates!<br><br>
Have fun!</div>
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AugustineM:<br><br>
Just wondering if you could tell me a little bit of what to expect when my daughter is 21 months old and I have a newborn (due 10/9/2007). My daughter just turned one and I just got a positive PG test! I have no idea what a 21 month old is like. Do you have any advice to share?? I would really appreciate it! I am a little scared of the prospect of having two so close together. Thanks!
 

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Carmalbert -- I'll PM you! I'd love to share my wealth of 21 mo. old knowledge (ha ha!). I also see you're in Seattle. Me too. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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Sometimes I think it's better for #2 to be an "oops". A lot of people really agonize over whether or not it's time to start TTC #2, maybe it's too early, what's the ideal spacing, yada yada yada..... instead of the excitement and anticipation there was with TTC #1, at least for us there is a lot of anxiety around the issue. My DS is 3.5 and we're still kind of stalling on the decision...I would love to just get pregnant "by accident" but really I'm way too uptight for that to ever happen. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug">
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>wednesday</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7281571"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Sometimes I think it's better for #2 to be an "oops". A lot of people really agonize over whether or not it's time to start TTC #2, maybe it's too early, what's the ideal spacing, yada yada yada..... instead of the excitement and anticipation there was with TTC #1, at least for us there is a lot of anxiety around the issue. My DS is 3.5 and we're still kind of stalling on the decision...I would love to just get pregnant "by accident" but really I'm way too uptight for that to ever happen. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"></div>
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That's how I hope it happens with us too! Although I hope it would be after DS is over a year. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"> DH is ready "anytime I am." But, I'm SO not ready yet. To the OP, congratulations! I hope you find the excitement with #2 that you had with #1!
 
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