Mothering Forum banner
1 - 19 of 19 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,128 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Not so much that I won't be able to finish on time,or that I'll produce total crap (though, honestly, BOTH could happen!) but about my privacy. I know they say nothing actually gets read, just a word count, but really...How can I know? I don't want to work my rear off to send it off to cyberspace where it can be read, altered, or laughed at by total strangers!

Please share with my your experiences with NaNo and how you came to "trust" that your work wouldn't be read without your permission.
Thanks!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,128 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Dh still doesn't want me to sign up for NaNo, so I don't know how supportive he'll be. I mean, I'm pretty sure I'll spend ungodly amounts of time on the computer and I'm worried that he'll get crabby. He says he's fully in support of me writing, he just doesn't think NaNo is the way to do it.

So how can I do this? How can I homeschool my son, meet my obligations, cook dinners, go out of state for Thanksgiving, and still get a decent amount of writing done? I don't care if I actually HIT 50,000. It'd be nice, but I won't be devistated if I don't. How can I cope with a dh who thinks I'm making a mistake or that my "work" will be stolen? How can I still be a good mom, and do Nano?

Are these kinds of crazy, hyperventilating inducing fears normal a month before the start of NaNo?

Talk me down! Please somebody talk me down! I really want to do this. No, I really NEED to do this, but that evil little voice in my head is telling me I can't, and that if I try I'll be a bad wife and mom.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
955 Posts
Mainly subbing . . .

I have been toying with the idea of doing it too, but have A LOT of apprehension. I know my personality and I know I will simply drop it, grateful for even having tried, if it gets too much. BUT, it has been years since I have taken time to do something for myself and indeed this feels pretty over-the-top. I feel selfish for carving out the time for myself, but I also know I deserve it and it is only me who is putting that pressure on me.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,842 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by Rigama View Post
Dh still doesn't want me to sign up for NaNo, so I don't know how supportive he'll be. I mean, I'm pretty sure I'll spend ungodly amounts of time on the computer and I'm worried that he'll get crabby. He says he's fully in support of me writing, he just doesn't think NaNo is the way to do it.

So how can I do this? How can I homeschool my son, meet my obligations, cook dinners, go out of state for Thanksgiving, and still get a decent amount of writing done? I don't care if I actually HIT 50,000. It'd be nice, but I won't be devistated if I don't. How can I cope with a dh who thinks I'm making a mistake or that my "work" will be stolen? How can I still be a good mom, and do Nano?

Are these kinds of crazy, hyperventilating inducing fears normal a month before the start of NaNo?

Talk me down! Please somebody talk me down! I really want to do this. No, I really NEED to do this, but that evil little voice in my head is telling me I can't, and that if I try I'll be a bad wife and mom.
I did feel a little nervous about it last year. But, I can assure you that you can still be a good mom and a good wife even while dong Nano. I noticed in your sig that your ds is 5. That is a much easier age than having a baby or toddler.

Also, you only need to write 1,700 words per day. That goes pretty fast. That can be banged out in an hour or two of productive writing. You can do it at night after your little guy is asleep or get up a little earlier each morning.

I'm sorry that your dh isn't supportive. I don't know what to say to that. My dh has been incredible. Even last year when we had both first heard about Nano, he thought I should go for it. He would take the boys out for a few hours on the weekends so that I could have some solid writing time. He knows that I need to write to feel sane - lol. I'm in a better mood when I get to write. He even helped me get over writers block a few times by giving me some whacky ideas of things to write about - LOL. And he loves my story idea for this year.

Nano is such a good way to write. It is great motivation. It helps the creativity flow and is so energizing. It is amazing what ideas come out when you are writing fast off the top of your head. It is a fantastic experience. Then you get to look back and say "I wrote a novel". Not everyone can say that. It is something to be proud of.

I don't know what else to say. I hope you decide to go for it. I hope your dh realizes that he should be supportive.

ETA - Nano was a great experience for my oldest son last year too. He was 7 at the time. He helped give me ideas too. He insisted I have a cat in my story - lol. And, he also sat down and started his own story. I think it is great for kids to see a parent doing Nano. The whole family got caught up in the excitement.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,128 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thank you!

What a wonderful post that was...Exactly what I needed.

I used to write all the time. I used to feel like my heart would shrivel up if I didn't. But I also have a lot of issues surrounding it, too. As a teen, my mother would tell me I wasn't special or smart. She'd read my stuff and I'd get in huge trouble if I wrote something that she took to be a negative against her. Then I moved out and wrote CONSTANTLY. It was like flying. Until I got in a long term relationship with a man who was really smart, a wonderful writer and someone whose opinion I strongly valued. After begging me to let him read some of my stuff, I gave in. He read and laughed and said I was totally un-original, that I had nothing worthwhile to say, and that I was self-indulgent and pseudo-intelectual. I destroyed the entire collection he was reading, and never wrote again. Sometimes, just the thought of going back to it makes me want to cry. My fingers start to tingle and the room spins a bit...But at the same time, I think about writing constantly. I really want to do it, I feel guilty that I don't. That relationship has been over for 7 years, and it's embarassing to say that his slams against my work still hurt me. I think that NaNo would be a wonderful way for me to ("painlessly") get back into it. So regardless of whether or not DH thinks I should do it, it's not up for negotiation. Hopefully he'll come around, though.

Wow, that was a lot of response! I guess I just needed to purge them. Thanks agian
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
896 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by rachelle-a-tron View Post
What is NaNo? Can you guys supply a link to it on the web?

Thank you! It sounds interesting.
http://www.nanowrimo.org/

OP: Good luck! Even if you only end up with time to do a few thousand words, it's still a good way to get started. I think I've convinced myself to give it another shot this year even though I doubt I will win with a 4-month old dd.

Just write for yourself--try not to worry about what some jack-ass intellectual snob would think. Maybe he just didn't get your writing anyway.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,949 Posts
I'm also thinking of doing it but nervous. I have a toddler dd with severe food allergies (all food must be prepared from scratch, for her and me, as I'm nursing). I have a dissertation that I MUST finish (actually, maybe I should make November NaDissWriMo
). But I also kind of feel like...an hour or two a day? I can find that, right? Stay up a little later. Disappear from MDC.
Give up my evening reading time for a month and make it evening writing time. I am a FAST writer when I don't care about quality, though--in high school, I churned out two (abyssmally wretched) novels, each in a month's time.

It doesn't hurt to sign up and see what happens, right?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,128 Posts
Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by puddle View Post
http://www.nanowrimo.org/

OP: Good luck! Even if you only end up with time to do a few thousand words, it's still a good way to get started. I think I've convinced myself to give it another shot this year even though I doubt I will win with a 4-month old dd.

Just write for yourself--try not to worry about what some jack-ass intellectual snob would think. Maybe he just didn't get your writing anyway.
Or maybe he was just jealous of and intimidated by my superior skill!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,782 Posts
You can do this!

I tried this years ago with a group before I had the internet at home. Two years ago my son was born 2 weeks early in November and I did not make my world count. Last year my husband deployed to Iraq right before the month started. Again, I did not make it.

This year I am pregnant and due on November 14th, have a toddler and I am homeschooling a 8 year old. Oh, and hubby will not be home till near the start of the new year. Did I mention I am all alone here with no one to help? No family coming even to help with new baby around. Yet, I am excited to try yet again this year. I welcome the distraction. I welcome typing and thinking while breastfeeding new baby in the middle of the night. I am putting all other homeschooling aside for the month and my daughter shall be writing for NaNo as well everyday. My son can have his own note book and scribble in it.

I am a wonderful mother and all the better for showing my kids that it is ok to take time to renew thier own spirits and take time to follow dreams.

I can do the writing in 2 hours a day if I start planning now. I am having a homebirth with a midwife and I can write while in labor. (I went to choir practice when in labor with my son after my water broke. LOL) I will find time to write.

My problem right now, I no longer want to go with the plot Idea I had for the last 5 months. I have pregny brain and am lost as to what to write.


In short, you can do this and be a wonderful mama.

Blessings,
Kimmy

P.S. After all these years I do trust them with my work.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,128 Posts
Discussion Starter · #13 ·
We are moving, and should, hopefully, be completley moved into our new place by Nov 1. And this move has the added mixed blessing of potentially preventing us from going out of state for thanksgiving. But, even if we do go, I'll bring along dh's computer and a flash drive and do my writing when eveyone goes to bed.

Dh has come around a little, but he's still really scared someone will steal my wonderful, perfect, fabulous Rough Draft and someone else will become rich and famous. It's sweet, really, that he thinks so highly of my skills.

I've beens spouting my mouth off to everyone i know that I'm writing a novel. I figure if I mouth off enough, I'll feel humiliated if I only write 10,000 words


I've also been talking to Ds about this. He's so sweet. He asked if I'd read him my novel and I told him that it's not appropriate for kids. So he said "Well, then I'll write my own novel too! As long as Despereaux!". My sweet boy. My heart feels so big when I think of him.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
73 Posts
This:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rigama View Post
I really want to do this. No, I really NEED to do this, but that evil little voice in my head is telling me I can't, and that if I try I'll be a bad wife and mom.
makes me really sad.

:

and you're absolutely right - it IS an evil voice. you shouldn't listen to it. or, you should listen to it harder (runaway metaphor?) and really think about why you're feeling this way, because that voice is telling you a really harmful lie.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
704 Posts
More encouragement from me....I'm doing it...I didnt make it last year- and that was fine.

But this year---I'm cranking it out- I HAVE to...for my soul!!!

I dont know how I'm gonna do it- I'm gonna need some alone time here and there- but luckily- my dh is a NaNo freak and is totally supportive. (we'll see how much when he gets home and I say I need to leave and write for a while...)

And you should at least give it a shot! Even if you dont get to 50,000- you'l have TRIED!!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
175 Posts
I did it the year before last. It was not as hard as I thought it would be. It took about an hour a day. I think it would have been better if I wrote complete crap. I actually liked my story and have spent the past two years editing it.

As a exercise in scheduling and just writing to get it out there it's a great thing. But I just wrote to hit the deadline, get in the words, and it ended up all jumbled with so many spelling and grammatical errors.

I don't think I'd do it again as it's taken me more time to edit the novel then it would have to have written this in the first place.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
35 Posts
I am totally convinced I will have a POS (piece of ****) draft on November 30, but I'm signed up and psyched for November 1.

With the few remaining days, you might try writing to see how long it takes you to get to 1667 words. It might surprise you that it doesn't take long....as long as you don't EDIT. Save the editting until after November 30.

If you don't finish the 50,000 words, you will still have more words than if you didn't participate. That's how I'm looking at it. But I really, really want a "winner" logo to put on my blog so I'm going for it.


For those of you interested but not ready for the plunge, think about NaBloPoMo. All you have to do it post something, anything, on your blog every day in November. That's it! If you don't have a blog, you can set one up on their site.

I'm doing both NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo, and I have a deadline next week for an article and a commissioned art piece due mid November. Insane? Sure, but fun!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,362 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by thismomwrites View Post
I'm doing both NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo, and I have a deadline next week for an article and a commissioned art piece due mid November. Insane? Sure, but fun!
I am doing both too, but sorta together. Using my livejournal on a locked setting to have a portable NaNo that I can work from at home, work or library.

That is on top of my holiday knitting.
 
1 - 19 of 19 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top