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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
At the grocery store today....I almost growled at another mom! I was reaching out to get Emma's weekly amount of pudding. The other mom's child was asking if they needed pudding. His mom responds, "No, we don't ever NEED pudding....it is not a necessity...and mom's that do buy it are just hurting their children
: "!!!! GRRRRR!!! I just wanted to scream, "DO YOU KNOW THAT PUDDING IS ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS THAT MY CHILD WILL EAT!!!!!!!". Why can't people just keep their negative feelings to themselves? Before I had my dd...maybe I wouldn't have ever given my child pudding either, but there could be worse things, right? And, no it is not the ONLY thing that I give her either, but when I look in my shopping cart I DO wish that I could JUST give her healthy items....and I could....she just wouldn't eat them
: .
 

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Wow! What a sh***y thing to have to hear. Maybe the only way for her to feel superior was to trash what you feed your daughter.

You are a better person that me...I would have said something like "I would LOVE to feed my daughter more nutritious things, but since she has ......this is all that she will eat, would you rather her starve?"

There are so many kind people out there...really, but once in a while you get a person like that. You handled well.
 

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Sounds like some of the posts I've read here.....
:

I probably would have responded bitchiliy if I was in a bad enough mood...something like, "how nice it must be to have a child without special needs and to live in a black and white world."

Either that or lobbed a pudding pack at her head.
:

 

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Hey, if pudding is the worst thing your child eats on a regular basis- you sound like an outstanding mom to me!

(hey, it's healthy right? it's got milk and in most kinds you can read all the ingredients)

-Angela
 

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moms who judge others based on what they buy at the store are just hurting their children!

don't worry mama, she has to live with herself in her puddingless world. I kind of feel sorry for her, the more I think about it.

You on the other hand, are not like her...
 

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I think I met this woman about 5 years ago.

My son had a feeding tube because of aspiration issues. He loved to eat, desperately wanted to eat, but it wasn't safe to allow him to do so. So for almost 2 years he got about 95% of his calories by tube, and cried whenever he saw someone eat something.

To make matters worse, his feeding team kept changing the few things he was allowed to eat -- so I'd get him used to (and excited to) eat something like say mango slices and he'd get pneumonia and they'd say "no fruit". Or he'd start refluxing and they'd say "maybe it's gluten, stop giving him that".

At one point the list of foods he was allowed to eat were things that had zero fat, zero protein, didn't contain any liquid that might come out when he chewed (so no fruit except for berries and bananas, no vegetables) didn't break into little hard to manage pieces (so no cracker type things), didn't have gluten in them, and weren't pureed texture. If you really think about it the list of things that leaves is very very short.

One day we were at the drug store, he was almost 2 (but looked maybe 13 or 14 months until you saw him move or heard him talk), and I picked up a packet of Skittles for myself (yeah, I know, not healthy -- 100 times worse than pudding!) and realized that it was a safe food (insert major irony here)! Yay, so I bought it and we had the experience of sharing a food -- I could hold it in my hand, let him pick one, smile at each other because it tasted good, talk about it etc . . . As you can appreciate this was a pretty powerful thing -- sharing food like that, even if it was pure junk.

Anyway, another mother walked by -- looked over and saw what we were doing and said, loudly, to no one, "Well, she's certainly not going to win mother of the year!"
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Momily,
I WOULD give you the Mother of the year award for that! You were enjoying a moment with your child....that's the best thing any of us can do for our children
. GRRRRR to that lady too!
 

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Grrr is right! I'm NEVER nice to people who do crap like that. Maybe it's better to be the more evolved person, but I want to make sure that mother knows the deal so she'll think twice before saying something again and hurting yet another SN mom. Although I also agree with carmel - how terrible to teach your children to judge other people. Ick ick ick. I don't want to think about it anymore. I'm just getting too steamed.
 

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Uh, whats wrong with pudding? I don't get why the lady was in a huff about it.

 

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I just like to think in my evil little head that one day, these uppity snits will get theirs. They'll have something happen in their lives that will make them look back on this past behavior and judgemental attitude and their cheeks will burn with shame. I know because I've been there. Karma is a clever little thing, and one day...one fine day....they'll get theirs. They will know. They will feel the shame of their words and judgement. They will be "that mom" who is being judged and tsk tsk tsked at by a total stranger who thinks her way of mothering is the only way to mother. They will feel the sting and realize how it must have felt when they uttered their little zingers at some poor unsuspecting mom just trying to do her best. Then they will vow to never EVER do it again, and try to make things right with the universe somehow. That makes me feel a wee bit better.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Finch View Post
I just like to think in my evil little head that one day, these uppity snits will get theirs. They'll have something happen in their lives that will make them look back on this past behavior and judgemental attitude and their cheeks will burn with shame. I know because I've been there. Karma is a clever little thing, and one day...one fine day....they'll get theirs. They will know. They will feel the shame of their words and judgement. They will be "that mom" who is being judged and tsk tsk tsked at by a total stranger who thinks her way of mothering is the only way to mother. They will feel the sting and realize how it must have felt when they uttered their little zingers at some poor unsuspecting mom just trying to do her best. Then they will vow to never EVER do it again, and try to make things right with the universe somehow. That makes me feel a wee bit better.
Well said!
 

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I'm not sure I could've resisted looking at my child and saying, in a highly audible whisper, something along the lines of "Oh, don't worry about that mean lady, sweetie. B!tchy women who share incorrect snap judgements out loud are teaching their children bad manners! You'll do much better in life than she will." If I've gotta walk around the grocery store with her sting on my face, she can carry mine.
: I used to be so tolerant, lol!

Sounds like she was attacking an innocent by-stander to make it easier to tell her child "no" Life must be so fun in her house
 

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Sounds like my experience at the grocery store yesterday. Not only does my son have eating issues (sensory-based) but he's also significantly underweight. So everything I buy for him is whole fat and yes, I bought a ton of pudding because that is one of the few ways I can get 300+ calories in him (we have a special recipe for it).

As I was getting the whole milk Alexander asked if it was his milk and I said yes (we drink FF) and a lady said "children that age need fat free milk or you're setting them up to get fat." I lifted his shirt up (poor kid - it was reflexive on my part) and showed him how he's all bones (he looks normal weight w/clothing on) and said "fattening him up is our goal, thank you!" and she quickly apologized.

I have a big mouth and can never let those comments go by without saying something. I'm sorry that you had to deal with that, its horrible. If you want our "super pudding" recipe that we got from the nutritionist I'd be happy to share it with you just send me a PM (not sure if your kiddo has weight issues as a side effect of the eating issues).
 

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Good for you GC mom. I swear I seriously can not stand moms, or even people in general, who don't know squat and butt in anyways. I have a sister who is one and she drives me friggin crazy. Anyways, to the OP, go enjoy your pudding with your DC and the next time someone says something like that to you, flip her the bird when she walks away. I always feel so much better when I do that.
:

Namaste,

Michelle
 

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WTH is wrong with pudding??? Maybe its not the healthiest thing but gah, its definately not the worst, by far. Most of those kinds of things are at the very least, calcium fortified and what-not - its not like she's having Doritos for dinner.


Quote:

Originally Posted by GC_Mom View Post
Sounds like my experience at the grocery store yesterday. Not only does my son have eating issues (sensory-based) but he's also significantly underweight. So everything I buy for him is whole fat and yes, I bought a ton of pudding because that is one of the few ways I can get 300+ calories in him (we have a special recipe for it).

As I was getting the whole milk Alexander asked if it was his milk and I said yes (we drink FF) and a lady said "children that age need fat free milk or you're setting them up to get fat." I lifted his shirt up (poor kid - it was reflexive on my part) and showed him how he's all bones (he looks normal weight w/clothing on) and said "fattening him up is our goal, thank you!" and she quickly apologized.

I have a big mouth and can never let those comments go by without saying something. I'm sorry that you had to deal with that, its horrible. If you want our "super pudding" recipe that we got from the nutritionist I'd be happy to share it with you just send me a PM (not sure if your kiddo has weight issues as a side effect of the eating issues).
Ugh, that has happened to me a lot (DS is FTT and has always been below the charts and tiny for his age). If you don't mind sharing that recipe, I would LOOOVE to have it!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Em's Mom View Post
At the grocery store today....I almost growled at another mom! I was reaching out to get Emma's weekly amount of pudding. The other mom's child was asking if they needed pudding. His mom responds, "No, we don't ever NEED pudding....it is not a necessity...and mom's that do buy it are just hurting their children
: "!!!! GRRRRR!!! I just wanted to scream, "DO YOU KNOW THAT PUDDING IS ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS THAT MY CHILD WILL EAT!!!!!!!". Why can't people just keep their negative feelings to themselves? Before I had my dd...maybe I wouldn't have ever given my child pudding either, but there could be worse things, right? And, no it is not the ONLY thing that I give her either, but when I look in my shopping cart I DO wish that I could JUST give her healthy items....and I could....she just wouldn't eat them
: .
Mama~ you rock!!! You are doing such an awesome job with your little one. I am so sorry on behalf of all moms for having to hear such a horrible comment from another mom. What a small, close minded woman she was.
The little
in me would have wanted to say something loud like "Pudding is what makes mamas sweet....when mamas dont eat their pudding, they become old and ugly"
 

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The comebacks are fun to think of, but Carson's comment is right one--talking negatively about other people, not to them but so that they can hear, is not something to do in front of one's children...or anyone's children, for that matter.

She made a bad decision, and you didn't. It certainly would have left me emotionally worked up, too, even though I only would have been buying the pudding because we wanted pudding
I hope you're starting to feel better about it now.

Sherri
 
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