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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
How was the transition for you and your DC? I am asking because I have a 4.5 y/o DS who I'd like to homeschool but my DH wants him to go to public school. (He's not old enough for kindergarten until next year.) So far he's never been away from me for any significant amount of time so you could say that so far we have "homeschooled." My husband contends that it would be easier to pull him out of public school and homeschool him if it doesn't work out versus needing to put him in public school at a grade above kindergarten.<br><br>
Obviously my bias is that it would be easier to continue to keep him at home and if at some point it doesn't work out to then enroll him in the appropriate grade. I really am interested in all stories though, even if they don't support my current bias.<br><br>
Thanks!
 

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I support your bias <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"><br><br>
Seriously, my DD was in school until the end of 4th grade and DS went to preschool for two years before I kept him home. I found DD had a hard time taking responsibility for her education after being told what to do and when for so long. It was just this past year I saw her do it and she would have been in 8th grade. also, she came out of school feeling *bad* at things like math and reading and *stupid* in general because she has LDs.<br><br>
DS wasn't so bad, but I did (and still do) feel a real reluctance to try something in case he fails. It may be his personality though.
 

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I think if you look through threads here, you'll find a lot of parents who notice big changes in their child's attitude toward learning, despite brief exposures (as little as a few days or weeks!) to a traditional school environment.<br><br>
I have big concerns about this, because I do think my own attitude towards learning suffered during schooling. Even kindergarten has become much more academic than it used to be, so I'm erring on the side of caution and plan to opt-out of public school from the start.
 

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I took my ds out of ps in the middle of 1st grade. Within 6 weeks, both my husband and I noticed dramatic changes in our son. He was far less emotional, far less angry, much easier to make transitions, he was more able to go with the flow.<br><br>
It took about 9 months to de-school. Initially, ds would either sob hysterically and tell me he was stupid or "I can't". Alternatively, he would say (often) "I know that" (when he didn't). It was honestly very hearbreaking and upsetting to me.<br><br>
Good luck on your path...
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thanks so much for your replies. It's good to hear from people who have actually lived through it with their children.
 

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My dh and I were in a similar situation... we have JK here, though, and our oldest has a fall birthday, so he was 2 months shy of 4 when he started. The deal was that ds could stay home any day he wanted to. He went quite a bit at first, but by the second month, he was asking to stay home at least as much as he was going to school, and then more. Dh and I discussed it, and we withdrew him.<br><br>
To be honest, the transition wasn't that bad. But he had friends in our neighbourhood who weren't in school yet, we went to playgroups with kids who weren't in school (or were in half-days), and he hadn't really clicked with anyone at school, so he didn't particularly miss any kids from class. And the programme was pretty laid back, since it was JK. And two months isn't very long. We were also at a time when we could easily do a lot of fun activities -- apple/pumpkin picking, children's museum, nature trail hikes, lots of reading and crafts together, etc.
 

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<span>Mine went to school first and then homeschooled after 1st grade. It was wonderful to spring him from the system - he had not been happy, and was picking up some unpleasant behavior to boot. It sounds as if the big issue is not which should come <i>first</i>, but that you both feel the choice you want to make is what would work best. Here's are some good MDC threads in which people offer ideas on how to convince a skeptical dad that homeschooling is a good idea:<br><br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=396414" target="_blank">articles on info/defense of homeschooling</a><br><br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=526165" target="_blank">DH not on board</a><br><br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=579769" target="_blank">DH won't agree to homeschool</a><br><br>
And this is a nice collection of articles in the website of the National Home Education Network:<br><a href="http://www.nhen.org/dads/default.asp?id=306" target="_blank">For Dads by Dads</a><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> Lillian</span>
 

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My daughter was not in preschool but attended public school for Kindergarten. Dh wasn't ready to make the commitment to homeschooling so we tried K. It really was fine but not a fit for our family.<br><br>
If I had it to do over, I wouldn't do public at all. Now, my daughter knows what she is 'missing'. The friends, recess, PE. She can see she gains a lot by homeschooling but does yearn for those things school offered.
 

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I started hs our oldest in 9th and his brother in 4th.The others have never been to ps.IMO it was hard on my oldest to be hs.He wasn't with his friends,etc...But he'd picked up some bad habits and things weren't heading where they needed to be so hs.He had no study skills to speak of,was expert at filling out worksheets.Couldn't write a 5 paragraph or even one cohesive paragraph to save your life.He's now 29 and a navy chief.<br><br>
Ds no 2 was wearing a gifted label in ps but not getting much help with it other than an "enrichment class" once a week.He also knew how to fill out workbooks quite well.He's now grown with a B A<br><br>
Hindsight being what is,I wish I hadn't ever sent my fist two to ps,at the time though I thought we needed the extra money and I was teaching too.I had to unlearn many things myself about "education" and what constitutes real learning.<br><br>
Dh did think I was nuts,but I didn't need his permission to do what I thought was right.I do remember telling him that if he thought it was such a good place maybe he should go visit for a day since he'd never even darkened the doorway before? Now he's our greatest supporter but its been 18 yrs LOL
 

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ITA with you, it's much easier to keep him home and if at some point you feel it's really not working for him, you can reconsider the idea of school. I don't think any child should have to go to school if he's happy at home and the at-home parent is happy to have him there.<br><br>
You might guess that my DH was not totally on board the homeschooling train at first. He's much more supportive now. Best of luck to you!
 

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My dc were in public school last year and we're homeschooling this year. Today is my first day!!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br><br>
So....I'll let you know later! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 
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