I was having a conversation with my SIL a few days ago about TTC. I plan on starting TTC soon, and my SIL (who has a 5 month-old baby) wanted to give me some advice.
She said basically all you need to do is BD for a few days before and a few days after your period. Now I have read all about TTC with cycle charts, temps and cervical fluid mucous, so I know for a fact this advice is kind of silly. The reason I really felt like ranting is that my SIL is a DOCTOR. Ok she is only a GP, not a gynecologist, but still!!!!
I didn't bother arguing with her cause it only took her 4 months to conceive so obviously it worked for her, and she thinks she knows everything cause she is a doctor, but geez... what exactly do they teach in med school???
Well, I have to be honest with you - for years....since I was a teen....I also heard from "everyone" that the three days before and after your period were when you could get pregnant. Now, I am in my late 30's, have three children which I conceived the second I breathed the idea and it wasn't until this past fall that I started reading the book about your fertility did I find out how wrong wrong wrong this old wives tale was!!! I had to have surgery to repair both of my damaged tubes, and that is when I started to get a clue about my own fertility b/c me and dh would like another baby....
So, obviously this is a thought that many many people believe. It is hard to believe that an M.D. would think it though?????
Kinda scary actually!
Well, at least YOU know the truth......!!! Good luck!!!
In a way, though, it makes sense, depending on how you define a few days. If "five" is a few, you'd be having sex around cd12--which is right before O for a lot of people. Still, there's a huge number of people that wouldn't work for, obviously. I don't get the "a few days before," though.
Oh boy.... Gasp, from a MD?! I have never heard this tale. Is it more like a North American thing? I was clearly taught in school in 5th and 8th grade during sex ed that the average day of ovulation is 14, but can differ from woman to woman and that sperm lives up to 4-5 days and hence there is your window of fertility. Actually our teachers tried to portray it as if you sort of always are fertile so we would always think of contraception.... (maybe it worked, who knows, but only one girl at my high school got pregnant during my time at high school. granted, who knows how many really were pregnant and decided to not have the baby - dunno).
Originally Posted by lilmom
It's frustrating isn't it? As a society in general, we really don't teach our young women anything about how reproduction actually works. It's so sad.
I took a "life and family" class in high school and they "taught" us that you can get pregnant every single day of your cycle, including your period.
UM NO. No you cannot!
They were teaching this to hundreds of high school students! I guess to scare them into not having sex? but this was totally wrong.
It makes me really sad what people don't know, including doctors.
Well, actually, there is no way to tell if your cycle is off and you might ovulate early for whatever reason. Honestly, the only way not to get pregnant is not to have sex.
I think the way they teach fertility in sex ed is often trying NOT to give too much info. I mean, if they told all teenagers that you can only get sex on cycles where you ovulate and in the 5-6 day fertile window, you'd have teens not worrying as much the rest of the time... BUT they wouldn't always know for sure that they did/didn't ovulate yet (I know that *I* never know!), plus they probably have pretty irregular cycles when they first start AF, plus they're not always responsible about keeping track of things like that... so I think that's part of the reason.
BUT I'm still a fan of full education and support on this matter. I hate abstinence-only and poorly-run sex ed programs, ugh!
Now for doctors, there's no excuse. Think about how sad it is for the women/couples trying to conceive on this advice, going month after month missing the fertile window and thinking something's wrong with them, getting all those BFNs... makes me sad
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