[jadegirl553]

Here's the deal- I'm going back to school in August, and I desperately need to be sleeping more, and having more "mommy time" at night to study.

My DS will be almost a year old when I return to school- his b-day is August 31. We co-sleep now, except that he goes to sleep in a cradle at the foot of our bed for a couple of hours in the beginning of the night. And, we only have one bedroom.

We love, love, love co-sleeping. Even DH loves it. I don't mind feeding DS all night (feels like it sometimes, doesn't it?

). I know, also, that his life will be turned upside down come August, also. Both DH and I will be in class, but our schedules are done so that one of us can always be with DS.

So- any advice? How can I get him to sleep more, while still meeting his needs, especially since he's still pretty young?

Thanks for your help, mamas!

 

[jadegirl553]

bump.... surely someone has some advice?

 

[2BMamaof3]

About 9 years ago, I found myself in a similar situation. I was a single mama with a 10 month old babe...starting a full schedule at University and thought I needed to get my son out of my bed and get some good rest. I asked around (and I didn't have a huge support network at the time)...the best advice I got, at the time, was a version of cry it out that seemed to be a bit more gentle than out right night time abandonment.

I look back and feel quite sad, though. Had I had some other information, or just some more support, I think my son's needs would have continued to be met and his life wouldn't have been turned so upside down when I DID go back to school.

So what COULD I have done?

He could have continued to sleep with me and:

-I could have gone to bed earlier to assure I had enough rest.

-I could have taken one less class (I wanted to get done as fast as possible and always took one class more than I had to for full financial aid) so the pressure of school was less.

-I could have bought a reading light so that I could read (school work assignments) in bed after he had gone to sleep...I would still be there as he needed, but I would still be studying.

-I could have changed my procrastinating ways and adhered to a study schedule so that I never felt the insane pressure of needing to pull those typical college all nighters (NOT conducive to sleep OR great parenting

)

-I could have found a mama or two who had been there done that (often Colleges and Universities have non traditional student groups...sometimes other mamas and papas are there...sometimes parents of much older children who might have some insight for you) who you can vent to...a shoulder to cry on so to speak is a very good thing! MDC is also good for that!...email me for that matter! Sometimes just getting your stresses and resentments and annoyances OUT helps...journal?? Just because we might feel stress and, yes, even resentment, does not mean we shouldn't do it (in this case co-sleeping).

-Since you have a partner, you can also schedule some strict private study time. He can be the primary parent for an hour or two each night while you study at the library and vice versa.

It IS challenging to have a child and be a full time student...that is for sure, but it IS workable to be that student and remain a co-sleeper.

Good luck with everything and much support to you whatever you finds works best for you and your family.

Namaste,
Abby

 

[jadegirl553]

Thanks for the reply and advice, Abby!

I'm only taking nine hours this semester, but I'll be taking more next semester in order to graduate, plus logging darkroom hours in order to get ready for my senior show.

And, my DH is in school full-time and works full-time, so he's only home for a few hours around noon.

I guess I'm just feeling a little resentful of how much he neeeeeeds me. Even all through the night. And I'm just not sure that I can deal with that and with going to school, and with being the only parent most of the time. My DH will be with DS during my classes, which will be nice, but I'll still be in class, you know?

Thanks for the shoulder to cry on! :LOL