Mothering Forum banner
1 - 20 of 66 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,621 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Dh has made a new friend at work who is veg*n. We have gone out a few times to dinner with him, and always eat at veg*n or at least veg*n-friendly restaurants out of consideration for his beliefs. Well, yesterday we went out to dinner, and he was wearing new black leather shoes! I was a bit taken aback, and asked "Are your shoes leather?" He nodded and then changed the subject. I was really annoyed, because it was cold and I had wanted to wear my leather jacket, but because we were seeing him I picked something else. I'm surprised and kind of mad, because he has talked about how he could never eat animals, even fish, etc., and has been this way for years. How is it okay to wear leather, then? I know he is fashion-conscious, but still.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,053 Posts
i'm certainly not speaking for all vegans or vegetarians, but I have several leather items in possession. I wouldn't call myself political or activist about not eating meat, it's just a personal health choice. I personally don't want to eat meat from animals that are most certainly crazy in their environments and that have been messed with genetically, chemically, and physically. And I don't preach to anyone about how I'm healthier, better, or anything elser than they are--just a personal take on the world that aggressive behavior and carnivores seem to go together.

I think of my dog in these terms--would I kill him to eat him? No. If he died would I be opposed to making a blanket from his pelt? Probably not--he won't want it anymore, and he really is very soft and warm. But would I kill him so I could have a blanket? no. The pelt is much warmer while it's still attached to him.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,178 Posts
I lean toward the definition of vegan that includes eschewing all animal products. But, when I was vegan there were some leather products I would use: things I bought before I ever thought about going veg; things I bought at non-profit thrift stores, if they were cheap (but I wouldn't think of buying, say, a leather jacket at a pricey resale shop); sometimes things people gave me, even if they bought them new. I also often used materials that at a glance appeared to be leather, but weren't. For the most part I tried not to be obnoxious about my choices or to pressure other people into inconveniencing themselves for my benefit, and I didn't care to justify myself to others, though I could if someone asked questions.

FWIW, I now eat local eggs and small amounts of fish, but I still don't buy leather. But, my favorite jacket is an expensive suede that dh took home after it had been left in the lost and found for several months at the club where he used to work.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
692 Posts
I'm vegan and I won't buy any leather or fur proucts new.

I already own a leather coat I am going to FC because I don't want to wear it.

I will keep wearing the leather shoes I have until they wear out and then I'll make a decision about whether to buy some new-to-me ones or find a leather alternative.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,462 Posts
I"m vegetarian (well mostly) for health & religious reasons. So I wear leather. Fur bothers me. I mena, I"m ok if others wear it & all, & i"m not saying I never would, it just makes me a little sad.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,621 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks for the replies! I didn't know there was such a variation in belief about it. In some of the circles I run around in, leather is absolutely verboten, but these groups contain vegans, so that makes sense.

To tell you the truth, my mother gave me a really gorgeous clip-on fur collar and a cool faux fur coat that is a vintage knock-off that I never wear, because I feel guilty even owning them. I certainly wouldn't be caught dead wearing them around my friends.

But I guess now that I know my dh's friend has different standards, I can at least wear my leather jacket and not feel criminal.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,216 Posts
I am vegetarian and I don't actively seek out leather items outside of shoes. I have very difficult to fit feet and I do need to be professional. I have a leather jacket that I love because it was my grandmother's. I won't go out and buy a new leather coat or purse. I do not wear fur ever. I do wear wool.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,801 Posts
I'm vegetarian but wear leather shoes. It's funny, I was just talking about this with another (vegetarian) friend an hour ago. I've bought manmade shoes and regretted it when they fell apart a month later or when my feet started hurting so that I had to hobble around. So I buy quality leather shoes that will last for a decade and don't hurt my feet.

I don't get why you wouldn't wear your own leather jacket around him, though? I mean, I wouldn't not breastfeed if I were around a bottlefeeding friend, I wouldn't expect someone to not bring their roast beef sandwich to a picnic, etc.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,962 Posts
Well, we try and not buy leather if we dont have too. Dh needs a new pair of shoes for work (dress) and we can't spend what a gazillion $$ on vegan shoes so we will more then likely buy leather ones. Although we did buy vegan belts for him for work. Well, we did buy a pair of vegan shoes but he didnt like them so we returned 'em.

I think it was nice for you to be concerned with not offending your friend
I wish more people were that conscious of others. I have to admit, my jaw dropped to the floor when my vegetarian sister bought a new car with leather interior. Didnt make sense to me, especially when you dont HAVE to buy leather in cars. Shoes, otoh, is kinda a different story. But to each his own
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,621 Posts
Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by TwinMom View Post
I don't get why you wouldn't wear your own leather jacket around him, though? I mean, I wouldn't not breastfeed if I were around a bottlefeeding friend, I wouldn't expect someone to not bring their roast beef sandwich to a picnic, etc.
I see your point; I just try to be as respectful to my veg*n friends as possible. Although they know I'm an omni, I don't want to flaunt it or throw it in their faces at all. So for picnics and other gatherings, I wouldn't bring meat, only stuff that can be shared with everyone. Since a lot of my friends have kids, I want to avoid any awkward situations.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
173 Posts
Chicharronita:

It sounds like you are really concerened about your friends feelings. I think that degree of thoughtfullness is right on! Being a total vegan in this world is absolutely immpossible. It would mean that we can't ride our bikes or drive our cars or drink certain types of water all because of animal products. So most of us do what we can and then there are other's that do a little more or a little less.

My main goal is to stop animal suffering and by not eating meat or dairy products or eggs I feel like I am taking a huge stand and helping some animals and then I am vegan because of the health, spritual, and environmental reasons. I still wear some of my before I went vegan leather shoes and feel like a hypocrite when I do but I just don't have the money to throw everything away and buy new things- plus I think that might be kind of wasteful. Who knows how your friend came to get these leather shoes. It sounds like your friend respects who you are too regardless of what you eat or wear.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,139 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by Chicharronita View Post
I see your point; I just try to be as respectful to my veg*n friends as possible. Although they know I'm an omni, I don't want to flaunt it or throw it in their faces at all. So for picnics and other gatherings, I wouldn't bring meat, only stuff that can be shared with everyone. Since a lot of my friends have kids, I want to avoid any awkward situations.
I think that is really nice that you make the effort because it is hard to sort out food with kids. We have had a difficult time in the past at potlucks that were supposed to be vegetarian, but people would include beef broth or marshmellows in their "vegetarian dishes". We usually only let our kids eat things that we made.

We do not buy leather at our house, but on occasion, we have been given gifts that are leather. My mom offered to get me a leather jacket as a gift, and I declined. I found many shoes are made with pleather, and although they look like leather, they are actually synthetic. That said, sometimes, I do knit with wool- the synthetic is just icky and the cotton does not have the give that wool has. Also, we do have silk things, too. Lastly, I let my kids play with bees wax and eat honey because it is more natural/safe to me than some of the other products, such as parafin based crayons, plastillina clay, etc.

With new cars, it is hard to get the higher end models without leather. Luckily, we have found some great base models- who needs power locks and buttons to roll down the window.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,491 Posts
I think that vegan is a lifestyle choice where one avoids (or tries to avoid) animal products and stretching to using animals for personal gain altogether and that vegetarian, or strict vegetarian if you want to define the avoidance of eggs and dairy, is a dietary choice. This difference is subtle and can vary from person to person. I got rid of what animal items I had before going vegan but our car has leather seats. It bothers me, but we're not in a position to just get a different car so I don't beat myself up over it.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
2,002 Posts
I eat a vegan diet and avoid animal products in most other cases, but I do buy leather shoes. They last a lot longer and I have hard to fit feet, so it's one pair of leather shoes vs many pairs of synthetic shoes. I do buy fabric shoes when possible.

You do what you can.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
76 Posts
My husband is a strict-vegetarian Brahmin (from India)... which entails the whole religious ideaology, cultures, social mores, etc. attached to consuming meat.

But...... he has leather shoes, belts, wallet, and many of our friends (strict-veg Brahmins) have leather interiors in their cars, etc.

I have questioned this a number of times and they aren't bothered by it. However, I have some American friends who are very vegan-- some of them won't use cars because they can't be sure of animal by-product content, while some of them have leather goods.... and make-up.

So-- I just don't understand. I am vegetarian because I feel healthier eating veg, and it makes for a cleaner kitchen (IMHO).

Anyhooo-- interesting thread.
:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,729 Posts
I also have a car with leather interior. Since I have preschoolers who sometimes eat and drink in the car I can't imagine a car with out it. I do feel quilty sometimes but I think that all you can do is try to balance out your life and do the best you can. The smallest footprint you can leave is the best and I won't sit around and worry if I'm the vegan-est of all the vegans
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,907 Posts
Its so weird that this post is here because I've been struggling with this a lot these past two days. I eat completely vegan. But I find that I've started rebelling against my own beliefs because I'm sick of spending what little money we have on lesser quality vegan things.

I was looking to buy DS a pair of flexible shoes like Robeez. So I go to Isabooties and they all look kinda girly and not like they'd match any of his clothes. So I find two pairs I'd like and order them, then get an email saying those are both out of stock. So I search online for hours and I get more and more frustrated because I'm going to have to spend a lot of money on something I dont like. So I finally go to www.meinmindfootwear.com and find some REALLY cute canvas vegan shoes. But they dont make vegan sandals. So I bought the leather ones. And I'm feeling so guilty.

Same with wool though. I hadnt' bought wool in years but when I started CDing my son, I hated the marks that regular diapers left on him and where velcro would rub him and leave little rashes. Wool was the only thing that worked (not even some fleeces). So its one of those things where I feel like a hypocrite but I try to be responsible ethically and economically.

We also have leather seats in our car, which I've been okay with because they're always used cars...
 
1 - 20 of 66 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top