My dd is 8 weeks old and I have been having problems with ppd. I went through depression and anxiety in high school and now I am right back where I started. I am scared all the time. I am on meds but they havn't been helping for all of it. At night before I go to bed is the worst time. I have panic attacks and I am so scared of everything. If I see a bruise that I don't know how I got, I think I have leukemia. If I look at a mole, I am convinced that it looks different and I have skin cancer. I have been having a lot of bloating issues, which I never had before, and have been burping a lot. So then I start to wonder if I have an ulcer or stomach cancer. I am obsesseed with cancer and so scared of dying and leaving my family that I can barely function. Dh works a lot and is gone most nights. I have a grandmother dying of lung cancer and a grandfather who is 91 who's body just won't function much longer. My other grandma died years ago of lung cancer. Both living grandpas have battled cancer (prostate and colon). My late grandma had breast cancer several years before she got the lung cancer that killed her. My sister has a lump in her breast and we don't have the tests yet about what it is. My BIL is battling schizphrenia and it has been getting to the point where meds don't help him much anymore. I am so freaked out. Is this stress all there is to life? I can't take it. I don't want to go on like this. I used to be so content and peaceful and now it is all such a mess.