In laws

I love ranting about my MIL! She's actually a wonderful, loving grandma just annoying at times, aren't they all! Some people say she's like "Kitty" from the 70's Show. She's was always trying to give ds more water like he was dehydrated. I just tell her that I'll nurse him.

And if she insists on using sposies when she's watching him, that's fine. Even though I use mostly AIO's and they're the same to use. I tell her I would prefer her to use the unbleached Seventhgeneration diapers and she still buys whatevers CHEAP and it leaves gel stuff on ds. Then I'm stressin on what toxins are seeping into ds.

She buys whatever food is cheapest and doesnt' give a thought to what's in the box. If a box of pasta has a list of preservatives & MSG in it, that's probably why it's 20 cents a box. not worth it in the long run when you get cancer or something! But, I do love her still!!!

My MIL died the week my son was born, but I have a great story about her. We had an ultrasound done at 20 weeks with my son, and they got a picture of his profile for me. When I showed her the picture of the ultrasound, she said, "I know you're going to think I'm crazy, but that picture is exactly how Chris (my dh) looked when he was born. Jack is going to look just like his daddy." I just kind of laughed and said okay. Well, she never got to see her grandson, but when I found pictures of my dh while going through her things, we found out how right she was! It was like I gave birth to a copy of my husband. The only difference was my son was born with a full head of dark hair, and when my hubby was born he had very little blonde hair. I just looked up to the sky and told my MIL that she was right, and started crying.

That's my favorite story to tell about her.

Oh yeah, the extended breastfeeding comes mostly from my mom. That was like her first question when I told her I was pg- How long will you breast feed?

My birth-mom was all concerned about having a homebirth without a midwife, because 'they know how to make it STERILE, if it's not sterile then the baby can get an infection' LOL, as if the biggest concern for a midwife is how sterile the place I give birth in is...

My mom again, she is all concerned about the weight limit on the port a crib, it's like 40 pounds or something, that the baby will get too big for it (it has a basinnette part that we're using as a co sleeper) and also that it says it's a pack-n-play, so it's for playing, not sleeping. Ahh, gotta love her.

These are funny, my dad is like the PP's FIL, really sincere and a great guy, but sometimes a little blunt. He hasn't said much to me, but I'm sure something will come up. Likely more about homeschooling than birthing, though, but I wouldn't be surprised...

Oh goody! I get to tell MIL stories... hmmm.. there'd need to be a book, really.

When I began miscarrying, MIL and FIL decided it was still appropriate for them to come stay in my home for a week (grrr). They didn't mention a thing about the loss (even though I was actively going THRU IT AT THAT VERY MOMENT!!!) Until...

MIL (At sink washing dishes and the two of us are alone together): It's not like you were trying very long to concieve anyway.

Me: Gasp, snort... What the F*#$ does it matter how long we were trying to concieve? Like the times I had sex with your son makes this loss any less hard? And how in God's name do you even have the slightest clue as to how many times we made love?

MIL: It probably is for the best anyway... having two kids right now would be overwhelming.

ME: Ya, we didn't really want it. We can just count our miscarriage blessings.

MIL: Don't you think it was because you are still nursing dd?

Me: Ya. You are right. It is probably MY fault. I should have bottle fed all along.

MIL: How do you even know it is a m/c? Maybe you weren't even pregnant.

Me: Excuse me, I have to go pass some more fetal tissue.

But then, this last visit (they come every few months!) she asked if I was going to circ, and I used it as an opportunity to inform her COMPLETELY about the purpose of foreskin, how the surgery is performed, all the lates info, etc. I even told her that we certainly didn't go around cutting yonis to bits because it is "Hard to clean". She actually laughed. Then I asked if she would have her grandson circ'ed. She said absolutely no. Oh, and when I told her about the risks, I told her the specific side effects that her son has on his penis!

Ha! Course then she told me that b/c she listened to me talk about penises, she needed to talk to me about cosleeping....

her:

me:

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Boy, do I know this feeling!

Jumping in from November, because I couldn't resist (I was due Sept 04 - does that count? )...

On the circ thing... MIL was actually good... She said that back then, they were told that that was healthier, but she understands that they know more now. So she didn't have a problem with that (DH wanted to circ, but I sent him all the research, then we didn't talk about it at all, and then we ended up in the hospital at 29 weeks and the nurse asks "If it's a boy, do you want him circumcised?" and I said "*I* don't want to", then looked at DH, and he said "No" - YAY!).

What annoys me (and MIL is a dear, sweet, well-meaning woman), is that she keeps asking me if I've felt the baby move. I was only 6 weeks when she asked this, so no, I hadn't felt it. Then she said she felt DH move at 6 weeks. She's told me the story about it - she was walking through a store with a friend, and she said "Oh!" when she felt some flutters, and then her friend told her that was the baby moving. I have to wonder if she's maybe forgetting a "1" before the "6". That I would certainly believe (I felt my first move at 15 weeks). But she never stops asking me if I've felt the baby move, and I don't want to burst her bubble (she's really proud of the fact that she felt him move so early and he never stopped moving, even after he was born - he's a very active, busy person). So I just nod and say "I won't feel it for several more weeks" and leave it at that. I even said baby was still below my pelvis, but she said she felt it below her pelvis. *sigh* Maybe I need to lend her one of my pregnancy books that says when spontaneous movement begins. I know it hadn't begun yet when I had my u/s at 7w1d - it was just one big heart moving there!

Also, again at 6 weeks, she starts asking if we've picked out names yet. We've got a LONG time before baby comes. Then when I tell her we haven't talked about them yet, she says "You need to pick them out really soon, because you might have it early again". Ok, the last one came at 29w4d. I still had over 23 weeks left at the time we were having this discussion. If baby came the earliest it could be viable, we'd still have at least 18 weeks to decide. So really, I'm not worried about having a name picked out at 6 weeks! :

Again, MIL is a dear, sweet woman. I really like her. But I hate talking to her when I'm pregnant. :

Thankfully, on most issues, we're ok. I cloth diaper, and she cloth diapered DH. I breastfeed long term, and she breastfed DH for about a year, I think. She's totally cool with my bf'ing (DS is 21 months now, and down to just nap time and bed time). I don't co-sleep, so that wasn't an issue. And we're on the same page as far as discipline goes (I'm not really GD, but more "whatever in my toolbox is effective and appropriate for this child").

But the pregnancy stuff... UGH. And she only had DH, and was pretty clueless about everything at the time, since she just followed the doctor's orders and didn't have the Internet to research stuff. So she's had one pregnancy 34 years ago, and her memory is really fuzzy.

it must the be the generation. My mom is a nurse ( even worked in L&D in the 70's) and I still get that crap from her.

"should I send you bottles?"

No I won't bottlefeed.

"oh,you still might have to supplement and that's what xyz's wife said,too, she weaned after 4 weeks"

Aha.

Thanks for nothing. :

My MIL has been great so far, but I'm only 18 weeks PG with our first. (She's not the saint DH makes her out to be, but that's a different thread! )

It's FIL we're having trouble with. We have three cats. We have had them for years. FIL does not like the cats, has never liked the cats. Which is fine, he doesn't get to live here. But now he's decided we have to "get rid" of the cats before the baby comes. He's insistant. He's rude about it. DH actually got into a screaming match with him over it last week. . Guess it didn't help when I finally got fed up and blurted out "Not your house, not your rules." oops.

MIL has said she thinks BFing is dirty. SIL nursed her first for 6 weeks, but quit when it got too hard, and now says all three of her kids were BF? I really don't get her logic on that one! Anyways, I can just hear all the flak I'm going to get for BFing, if things go as planned. SIL has also said some nutty things, like we have to start passing the kid off to anyone who wants to hold him/her as soon as possible, because it's the only way they learn not to depend on you. Uhm, I kind of WANT my kids to be able to depend on me! LOL!

Whacky in-laws...

Reading all of these posts remind me of how good I have it . MIL lives pretty far away and we don't really talk to her much at all. DH doesn't get along with her either. She's never really given me parenting advice except to not put my arms up while I'm pregnant or I might strangle the baby and when DD was born she insisted that immerse (sp?) DD in a bath of pure baby oil to get the scaley skin off. Ummm, no thanks!! Brand new babies are slippery enough already!

As for all the things we plan to do with this baby, i.e. homebirth, cloth diaper, ebf, co-sleeping...etc., she has no idea about any of it. We really just don't talk to her about that stuff.

My mom on the other hand is completely supportive of all of my choices. Well, at least she is to my face I don't know if she thinks I'm crazy behind my back

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AHHHHHHHHHH!

Bumping this back up, MIL has come up with some good ones lately.

She recently found out that I have never had a pelvic exam, and never plan on it. EVEN in labor, LOL. She is constantly telling me 'well, I was told that I just couldn't have a baby more than 6-1/2 pounds so it's a good thing I got checked' and 'well, I wonder what would happen, ya know, you've never had your anatomy checked' this is like every week She is just AMAZED that I can give birth without permission being given from a doctor. I just tell her, yup, we'll go ahead and prepare for it to be all normal, and for some reason I *can't* get the baby out because "my anatomy" just isn't right, then I suppose we'll hop in the truck and go to the hospital and get it chopped out. : LOL

Another one, it was hot HOT, like 90 after a bunch of weeks in the 50s. My ankles were a little swollen and I was amused, so I was rambling about my lack of ankles. She tells me oh, that can be a sign of~~ I interrupt her and say, nope, don't have preeclampsia, I just took my blood pressure today and have no protein in my urine~~~ Then she tells me that it's a sign of elephentitis and I should go to a doctor to get it checked out because that's dangerous for the baby. She thinks elephentitis is something to do with pregnancy. NO, it's freakin normal pregnancy and hot weather swelling. I had to look up elephentitis just to see what it is, and it's a parasite infection.

LOL

She really does respect me, it's just beyond her how someone who has a head on her shoulders would go through a whole pregnancy without seeing a doctor. And she *thinks* I've seen a midwife (we're UP/UCing)

Cara