In the Spotlight sehbub 8/9-8/11

First questions. How many children do you have, what are there ages, what are there personalities like? ( sorry I didnt check out your siggy before) How many children do you plan on having?
I have three beautiful girls. Victoria is 6, and very much a teacher's pet. She was Student of the Month in kindergarten, for crying out loud. She's the one we're going to worry about when she becomes a teenager. She's athletic, and loves to learn new sports, but is also fairly girly. She's willing to try anything once, twice if she came away unscathed.

Sydney is 4, and aptly nicknamed "Doodle." She is one of the silliest kids I have ever had the priviledge to know, and makes me laugh on a daily basis. She is more rebellious, and has led her preschool class in a few "acting out" events in the last year. She seems to be growing up well though, and we're not real worried about how she'll do. At least she's getting it out of her system now! Sydney is more of a tomboy, but is a wuss. She is afraid of everything, but looking back, Victoria was like that at the same age.

I wish I could take credit for their beautiful names and incredible looks, but I had nothing genetically to do with either of them. They are the bonus family I got when I married my DH, Brad. I've known them since Sydney was 18months and Victoria was 3, so they call me their 'Nother Mommy. Mommy to my face.

Samantha is 16 weeks old tomorrow (and I'll be 12 weeks pregnant!!). She is our success story, in that she was born at 30wks, and is already on the growth charts for her real age. She is starting to smile, which lights up the entire room for all of us. Her sisters love her to pieces.

This very well may be our last baby, unless it's a girl, in which case we'll freeze some sperm and try again at a later date and hope for a boy. Either way, DH is getting snipped! Sam was a birth control baby, and this one was a 1 in 1000 chance. So we're incredibly fertile people.

What is your favorite part of mothering now and what do you look forward to the most with this one?

I love watching things through my kids' eyes. I learn so much more just by listening to the way they think. I am a better woman because of them, and I thank them every day for making me a better mama. I look forward to integrating this baby in to our already amazing family. Most mornings I pinch myself over how blessed I have been in just three short years. It is truly amazing.

What is your favorite place you've ever travelled to, and why?
I was lucky enough to spend a month in Salamanca, Spain, studying the language and living in an apartment with my mom and brother. I learned so much, and met so many amazing people from all over the world. It was an experience I will never forget, and one I hope I can share with my family someday. It was beautiful, and enlightening, and I came back with a renewed sense of self and purpose to my life, at the ripe old age of 17. I finally felt like I fit in. It was the first time in my life I was surrounded by a culture that praised women for looking like women, and having been a very athletic, fit size 14 since the age of 12, that was a welcome relief.

I'll try to keep my other responses more brief!

Quote:

No need!! I for one like long responses. What are your goals for your childrens' futures?

are you nervous about having this babe so close to your last? how is your body handeling being pregnant again so soon?
Yes and no. The thing I'm most afraid of is delivering so early again. There was no reason for me to go in to labor at 27wks with Samantha, but I did anyway. Luckily they held me off for 3 weeks, but still. I have nightmares that my body rejects this baby too. It's hard to not feel guilty when your baby is laying in a plastic box and is smaller than the stuffed animal sitting next to her. So in that aspect, I'm terrified. Otherwise, we're actually really excited. it'll be like having twins, without having to push two babies out back to back! As far as being pregnant again so soon, I honestly didn't know I was pregnant. I'm obviously a lot bigger this time around (I'm the size now at 12 wks that I was at about 20wks with Sam) but I'm not nauseous, or exhausted, or incredibly b*tchy like I was with her. Maybe that means it's the baby boy I've been dreaming about since I was 12!

What are your goals for your childrens' futures?
My goal for them is that they have the courage -and feel that they have the support from us- to do what they dream of doing. I don't care if my children are doctors, lawyers, bus drivers, auto mechanics, beauticians, or garbage collectors, as long as what they are doing makes them happy, and doesn't harm anyone else. I want my kids to be able to wake up in the morning and be content with the choices they have made in their lives. I want them to know that we are behind them 100% no matter where their lives take them, and I want them to feel that they can come to us with the really tough stuff, and we'll slog through it together. I want them to know what love really is, mostly because I didn't find out until I met my husband. My girls should have a headstart on that.

What are your favorite hobbies? Do you like surprises? What's your favorite book? Movie?
I love to cross-stitch, and have made birth records for each of the girls. It's one of the few things I'm proud to admit I learned from my mom.
I really don't like surprises, which is why I'm shocked I handled the news of this baby so well. Then again, Sam was a shock too, and I handled that well too. So, baby surprises are good, but not any other kind. Although, I am a planner, so I HAVE to know what we're having before the big day. I just have to.
My favorite book? Yeesh. Um, honestly, I'm a trashy beach-book/airplane book kind of girl. You know the kind...single gals traversing the treacherous dating scene with witty friends and crazy family members in tow? Those kind.
My favorite movie is Princess Bride. I can quote that movie backwards and forwards. It just makes me feel good.

What is your "signature" dish? What is a favorite book from childhood? Who is your favorite performer? Your favorite animal?
Signature dish, eh? Um, probably my chili, or at least it seems to be everyone's favorite. My friend's boyfriend wanted to drive an hour from his house to mine just to have a bowl for dinner.
My favorite childhood book was To Kill A Mockingbird. My dad reads it every fall (Atticus Finch is very much like my father's father...reading the book feels like going home for him) so I read it too. Haven't read it in years, but loved it.
My favorite performer...no clue. There are so many people I would LOVE to see in concert. I will say, however, that of the concerts I've attended, N'Sync was by far the most entertaining. What? The tickets were free. :
My favorite animal is a horse. I want nothing more in life than to get enough land that we could have a horse or two. After that, I'm set. Most people dream about big houses and sports cars...I dream about having a horse.

What is your favorite part of being pregnant?
Watching my oldest girls react with me/the baby during the pregnancy. They absolutely lit up when we told them we were going to have another baby, and they keep asking when they get to find out the name and feel the baby kick. They're incredibly involved. It's bittersweet though, because the more excited they get, the less they want to leave (and the less I want them to leave) to go back to biomom's house. Now that their baby sister is interacting with them a little more, they hate going home. They want to be with her all the time. I wish it was easier.

How and where did you meet your husband? Did you know he was the "one" right away?
Okay, this is a tough one. I'll give you both versions...the parent's version, and the friend's version...
Parent's: Brad and I met while I was managing an upscale restaurant in my hometown. He was selling insurance at the time, brought clients in for lunch, saw me and asked for my number. The rest is history.
Friend's (true): We met online on a single's site. Nothing as auspicious as match.com, either. LOL. Really rather sordid, to tell you the truth, but I was very young (19) and he was lost after his divorce. We can be forgiven for the nature of our first meeting, right?
And yes, the first time I saw him, I knew. He sent me an e-mail online which I responded to and he called me that night and we talked for 6 hours, at which point we agreed to meet for breakfast. He lived an hour away, mind you. Once he got there, I took him to grab some breakfast sandwiches and then drove him to the top of a nearby mountain and we watched the sun come up. As he drove away, I knew I was watching my husband leave. He met my family two days later (it was my b-day...my mom, who is not the nicest person in the world, flicked him off at the dinner table) and two days after THAT, I met his family and he proposed. The following week I met his kids. I didn't actually get my ring for another 15 months (he had to save up) and we got married 4 months after the "real" engagement. It's been 15 months of marriage now, and we'll have two kids together before our second anniversary. Sorry to ramble...I just adore this man, and am so blessed!

Who was your first crush, and how old were you?

What is in your purse?

What does a typical day look like for you?

I know my questions are not the traditional pregnancy related, I hope these are ok

Who was your first crush, and how old were you?

What is in your purse?

What does a typical day look like for you?

My first crush ended up being my first boyfriend...his name was Matt, and he was a "bad boy." I was 12, I think. : I'm absolutely terrified that my girls will be the same, especially considering the fairly loose morals that exist in my DSD's home with biomom. Watch out! DH (sort of) jokes that we'll be grandparents in 10 years. DSD1 is 6. So yeah. Not too funny, really.

Purse? What purse? I haven't carried a purse since DD was born in April, but if I do go somewhere without her, I have my wallet, chapstick, cell phone and keys. That's pretty much it. The diaper bag is TOTALLY different story!

Typical day...DD usually wants to be awake and played with around 7am, so I get up with her and entertain her for 3 to 4 hours until I can get her back to sleep, then try and pick up the house a bit, do some work (all the while checking MDC constantly...true addict here) then just hang out with her playing and cleaning and doing yoga until around 6 when DH gets home and I make dinner while he entertains her, then I'm in bed around 9. DH stays up with DD until about midnight, and then I'm up with her usually around 4 to feed her, then she'll sleep another three or four hours.

Yonit, thank you. I had to grow up pretty quickly. I was in a skiing accident when I was 11 and spend six months in a neck brace, then three months learning to hold my head up again. My parents pretty much left it up to me to regulate my pain meds and decide if I could go to school or not. I also became an aunt in fifth grade, and my sister had terrible insomnia and PPD, so my niece slept in my room. I was doing the 3am feedings, then going to school all day, coming home and taking care of my niece while my sister was tutored so that she could graduate from high school on time. Getting married young and having kids immediately just worked for me, although all of my friends my age (22) gave me serious grief over the kids thing. Several even refused to accept that I was a mother until I got pregnant with DD, regardless of the fact that I'd been taking care of my DSDs for two years prior, and they've called me "Mommy" since almost day 1. My own mother didn't recognize me as being a mom until I delivered DD. And yes, I am an old soul. I'd much rather sit at home cross stitching and playing with my kids, or cuddling with DH than go out to clubs and bars. Imagine how my husband's X felt when she met me...she's 18 years older than I am!! I was only 8 months old when she graduated from high school!! :

What does your nickname mean? Do you hate fairytales with stepmothers? You sound like te best mom (step or not)!

When I was a baby, my dad called me chubbers, which turned to bubbers, which morphed in to sehbubs (say-bubs). That's really all it is. It's a nickname my dad gave me when I was a baby, and it stuch for my family. I think the pronunciation came in because my paternal grandmother was very southern and pronounced my name SAYrah. SEH is also my maiden initials.

I don't like the word stepmom at all. I know I am one, and I accept it, but my girls have never called me that to my face or otherwise. I'm just their second mommy, or their 'nother mommy, or just plain mommy. It's fun to be out with them and hear them tell people they have two mommies. Just to see the looks we get. It confuses the crap out of people, because my youngest DSD looks exactly like me. We're not exactly sure how that happened, but people question me all the time. "Are you SURE you aren't her 'real' mom?" Um, yeah. I think I would remember having a baby when I was 18! Or 16 with DD1. I love it though. The girls have never corrected anyone, because to them, I am their mommy. They consider themselves lucky to have two mommies who love them so much. Now they're hoping biomom will just settle down, because they want a second daddy too! Apparently her current bf is who they want. We'll see.

I try and be a good mom. It's hard, especially because I am so young. People give me dirty looks on occasion when they see me out with all three girls and hear DSD1 call me mommy. But they can shove it. : I never imagined I'd have four kids at the age of 23, but it works for me. I've always been very maternal, to the point of friends calling me "mom." I learned what not to do from my own mother, and try very hard not to become her. I've made a deal with my girls that if I ever get too grumpy or they think I'm being too hard on them, they need to tell me. So far it's worked well. I want to raise my kids in a very honest home, and make them feel like they can ask me/tell me anything. So far it's working well.

i love being a young mama. i wouldn't trade it for anything