[MamitadeTian]

My dd is 11 weeks old and I am feeling somewhat concerned and confused about our bfing relationship. I should say first off that she had been ingesting about 1 oz more milk than is usual during the first 6 week dr's visit, and she is now full of baby fat and squeezeable places. She does all the things she should be doing to indicate that she is feeding properly.

BUT, she nurses so little! Ds used to nurse constantly and would practically never reject my nipple when it was offered. He wanted to be on me all the time, too. Dd, on the other hand, often "asks" to be put down, and she rarely wants to nurse when I offer. She nurses a couple of times at night, once very early in the a.m., and then perhaps twice in the late afternoon. Hours and hours pass between the morning and afternoon feedings. And if I offer, she arches her back and screams and gets REALLY, REALLY angry. She is a very calm baby, not one to get so mad.

So I don't insist, of course, but I can't help worrying.

I feel so insecure about our bfing relationship! I had a terrible, terrible case of thrush during her first 6 weeks. The Dr. didn't find symptoms on her or DS, so he wouldn't treat me. I looked for help elsewhere when I realized I was fleeing my children! Needless to say, dd did not start out her life feeling that she was entitled to nursing, that it was there for her whenever she wanted it, for succor or nutrition. DH was in charge of the kids and would call when he couldn't hold her off any longer. I would come and grit my teeth and try to distract myself while I did my motherly duty and nursed dd. It breaks my heart for both of us to remember. I think dd learned to nurse so efficiently because of this!

In any case, I still feel like I don't really know her cues, and I am so anxious about the way she rejects the nipple. She will only take it if I offer it as soon as she wakes up from her nap. And even then, sometimes she will complain and flap her arms and fight my breast while she nurses. I am never sure if she is feeling forced to nurse or not! And I don't know if she is nursing as often as she would like or need.

Anyone out there who has a baby who didn't want to nurse all the time?

 

[plantmommy]

s

Don't put this all on you, mama.

My ds was a home water birthed baby who was attached to me within minutes of his first breath, nursed for 2 hours straight from that point on, and I swear, has NO HUNGER CUES! It's confusing and sometimes frustrating, but this is my third nursling, both others nursed well into toddlerhood; I know it's just how he is.

Meanwhile, he's just dropped back onto the growth charts since he started walking 6 weeks ago. Fat, fat, fat, healthy, happy baby. Quick and efficient nurser. It's incredible that he could be so fat when he only nurses for a few mintues at a time, but he is!

If you worry, count diapers. input = output. If you want more bonding time try playing hand games while nursing, if she's into it. Sometimes Reid likes that. (other times he swats my hand away)

Also, it never hurts to offer, and you cannot MAKE them nurse if they don't want to.

 

[sarahG]

I am no expert, but I will give my 2 anyway...if your gal is having some kind of memory of the thrush experience, I would think that if it's all cleared and you're back to enjoying nursing, just keep showing her that it's there and everything's okay, and she'll figure it out and get over any "trauma", if you will, of painful feeding. Now, this may be a stupid question, but have you checked her for thrush lately, since that can make them resistant to nurse, and you can pass it back and forth. If none of that is the issue, and she's got the diapers and fat to show she's alright, then alright. My advice would be then to make your infrequent nursings xtra special and enjoy your free time
best wishes!

 

[Miss Information]

Here are some helpful tips from www.kellymom.com on how to get baby back to the breast, of course ruling out any thrush in the baby.

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/...to-breast.html

Good luck and make sure you are pumping to keep up your supply.

 

[MamitadeTian]

Thanks for the support and suggestions!

I didn't think we could have thrush again (so,no, it was not a stupid question at all), since last time dd wasn't showing the symptoms and I appeared to have all the pain. But I looked, just in case, and she seems to be okay. Still, now I am left wondering. She didn't show any symptoms before, but we clearly had thrush, so maybe she WAS feeling pain, and maybe we are in a similar place. Hmm... To be on the safe-side, I am going to follow the protocol for thrush. It would be nice to be able to "blame" things on that, but I don't really want that shadow in our life again!

It's good to hear that other people have babies without feeding cues, and that those babies are healthy and happy!

Fortunately I don't have to worry about my milk supply because ds, 2 1/2, nurses pretty often, still, and keeps it up for all of us!