[Belle]

I have two daughters and we probably won't be having any more children. If they had had sons they would have been intact and my husband completely agrees with me.

My husband has two sisters who both have two circed boys and didn't want to hear anything about leaving them intact from me or him. We both tried. I changed one of those boys' diaper one time and was absolutely appalled by what his penis looked like. It was kind of scary looking.

My step-sister's son's circumcision was paid for by my own mother. My step-sister didn't seem really interested in having it done, but under pressure from the baby's father and my own mother (

) He was circumcised at 2 weeks of age.

When I was pregnant with my youngest daughter my mom was less concerned about us birthing at home than the fact that the midwives wouldn't be able to "do that thing to his penis". When I informed her that we wouldn't do that she went on an aggressive campaign to get us to change our minds. She didn't realize that my MIL regretted circing my dh and supported our decision. She asked MIL to convince us. When DD2 was born female she expressed relief to me that we didn't have a boy. I agreed. Not because I'm afraid of foreskins, but because I didn't want to have an endless argument about it.

My brother was talking to me about how unnecessary it is to dock dogs tails when they are puppies and I compared it to circumcision. He said "Isn't it cleaner to be cired?" I don't think he would be hard to convert over to our side, but he probably won't have any children at all.

I guess part of me wishes that I could have a boy just so I could show the world that my son would not be defective if he would remain intact.

I'm just frustrated that I can't seem to make a difference.

 

[ChristaN]

I can't say that I'm taken seriously, but I don't know if it is only b/c I have girls or not.

 

[baybee]

My progeny is 3 daughters and a grand daughter. I'm taken seriously because I really have my facts, I love all babies, and probably many other reasons. Our daughters grow up and look for lovers. If they lean towards male, I'd like them to have an intact one and keep my grandsons, great grandsons intact. This isn't an issue for just one type of parent or one gender. . . . it's a human rights issue that affects each and every one of us.

 

[BugMacGee]

I think people just think it's one of my *things*. I have seen enough babies harmed by circumcision in my work that I don't think anyone questions my credentials as the mother of two girls.

 

[kblackstone444]

I have a circed son (long time ago, dumb, dumb me) and a little girl, so NOBODY takes me seriously. Especially when they ask what my son's complications were/are and in all honesty, he got a "perfect" circ with no after effects except the obvious. That's why my sister circed my nephew.

:

 

[tlh]

Being an intactivist means being against male and female circumcision.The only reason why American intactivists focus mostly on male circumcison is that female circumcision has already been banned because of intactivism.If someone questions you based on only having daughters tell them you wouldn't have circumcised your daughter even if it was legal and of course wouldn't a son even if it is legal.

 

[tutucrazy]

Human rights violations extend beyond race, class, culture, gender, nationality and age. When there is a violation of a child's basic human right it is EVERYONE'S responsibility to speak out. Male circumcision impacts everyone. You have a husband, a brother, a friend. Even if you didn't know a single male you'd still feel the need to speak out against this barbaric tradition. If people didn't speak up for human rights just b/c they weren't involved we'd still have slavery here today.

In other words, it isn't the victim's responsibility to make change and it isn't the mothers of the intact boys responsibility either. It takes everyone. You have a mind and a voice. Having a boy won't make you more confident to use that mind and voice. What will make you more confident? Education. Educate yourself about the intact boy, the functions of the foreskin, the arguments against circumcision. Read everything you can get your hands on. The more you know the more comfortable you will feel with rebutting pro-circers and having discussions with pregnant mothers. Education, not relativism, is what will give you the confidence you seek.

 

[hippiemommaof4]

I can see how it would be hard but I think people are just ignorant to it anyway for the most part because to most people it's "normal" @@.Its so drilled into most people to be "normal" and do what is "normal" that they dont see any other way or care to educate themselves about other ways kwim? I tell people that we circ'd our other sons and left the last one intact and they look at me crazy. I also tell them I never wanted to do it to my other sons either and it breaks my heart that I did when I shouldn't have.

 

[kriket]

I think its hugely important that women with daughters be intactivists. We need someone to teach our son's future girlfriends whats normal!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belle My brother was talking to me about how unnecessary it is to dock dogs tails when they are puppies and I compared it to circumcision.

um..... see, this is one of "those subjects for me" I have an Australian shepherd, she has a naturally bobbed tail, well, she has no tail, there is a place where her butt hair comes to a point and covers the hole

For the longest time I was an anti-ear cropper. Then I got a min. pincher. Those dogs were bred to have their ears cropped. Mine's ears are still uncropped, but they are tattered and torn, we've combated 3 infections from running through bramble and getting things caught. The cat about tore one off, he got one caught in the kitchen door.

It doesn't help that hes a few rocks short of a tonne. Anyways, foreskin is 'developed' to serve a purpose, the dogs whos ears are frequently cropped were man-developed to have cropped ears. I'm not advocating for cropping of ears, but I can see where people are coming from now. Plus, the dog is never going to be able to make the decision to have his ears cropped for himself, you really have to do that for them. Like I said, I prefer breeds that are a bit 'better bred' and don't have the need to crop built in, but I have come to understand why some people (especially those who have active or working dogs) choose it.

I still think cropping tails is silly.

We can take this over to pets if you would like

 

[hippiemommaof4]

I know this is OT.... but my sister said a lot of breeders will crop a dogs tail so that other people cant show the dogs at dog shows because that's competition for them. It happened to her dog a pomeranian her husband got her and when she looked at the pup she was beyond peeved about it. I think its wrong to do that no way around it, poor dog.

 

[Treece]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kriket I think its hugely important that women with daughters be intactivists. We need someone to teach our son's future girlfriends whats normal!

Yep, both my boys need to be able to find girls (if that's what they choose) that will accept and love them even more for being whole. So, take that angle if you want. "My girls have the right to a natural love life!!" LOL

 

[Fyrestorm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Treece Yep, both my boys need to be able to find girls (if that's what they choose) that will accept and love them even more for being whole. So, take that angle if you want. "My girls have the right to a natural love life!!" LOL

I'm sure my DD will be looking for an intact partner! Male or female!

A friend of mine is strongly pro mutilation...She had her son cut up before I ever really became an intactivist and we were not close at the time...she jokes that out children will marry some day...I had to bite my tongue...DD will hopefully be looking for an intact partner and she won't be mutilating any children she might have.

 

[TheTMommy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fyrestorm DD will hopefully be looking for an intact partner and she won't be mutilating any children she might have.

So you are raising your daughter to make whether a potential mate is intact or not a major criteria? Seriously?

 

[ChristaN]

My girls are both on board with my line of thinking about this topic. I hold the opinion that children tend to be horrified by a lot of things that we take for granted if we don't sugar coat them and make an effort to make them sound normal.

 

[Fyrestorm]

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheTMommy So you are raising your daughter to make whether a potential mate is intact or not a major criteria? Seriously?

I'm raising her to know and understand the difference and be able to discuss genital mutilation with her partner before she ever agrees to procreate with a person who would want to abuse a child that way.

And yes, she will absolutely know and understand what she would be missing out on by having a sexually mutilated partner.

Have you seen the number of "what should I do - My partner wants to cut up our baby threads"?

 

[holyhelianthus]

To answer the OP: NO!!!

:

We are about to have our 4th and 5th girl (no more and no boys) and anytime I bring it up to friends having boys or with boys I get "oh Maggie, you just don't understand boys"

 

[holyhelianthus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fyrestorm I'm raising her to know and understand the difference and be able to discuss genital mutilation with her partner before she ever agrees to procreate with a person who would want to abuse a child that way. And yes, she will absolutely know and understand what she would be missing out on by having a sexually mutilated partner. Have you seen the number of "what should I do - My partner wants to cut up our baby threads"?

I'm not missing out by having a circ'd DH. Great sex life and more importantly we love each other.

Are we really going to black ball all circ'd men because of a choice their parents made? Really? That is so appalling to me. They are still men, still CAPABLE men, and still human beings.

 

[Fyrestorm]

Having experienced it both ways with the same loving partner..I can say without a doubt that while out love life was great before restoration it's out of this world now...and DH agrees.

My main concern is that my daughter not have to fight to keep any future children intact. The mutilation needs to stop here and now!

It's sad to me that parents are even given the choice to harm their children..is it the child's fault? No...should my DD suffer because of it? No!

 

[holyhelianthus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fyrestorm Having experienced it both ways with the same loving partner..I can say without a doubt that while out love life was great before restoration it's out of this world now...and DH agrees. My main concern is that my daughter not have to fight to keep any future children intact. The mutilation needs to stop here and now! It's sad to me that parents are even given the choice to harm their children..is it the child's fault? No...should my DD suffer because of it? No!

I understand what you are saying but she won't necessarily suffer and I think it is adding insult to injury to raise our DDs to turn down or look down their noses at cut men.

I'd rather raise open and supportive daughters who love unconditionally.

 

[Fellow Traveler]

Quote:

Originally Posted by magstphil I understand what you are saying but she won't necessarily suffer and I think it is adding insult to injury to raise our DDs to turn down or look down their noses at cut men. I'd rather raise open and supportive daughters who love unconditionally.

I can appreciate this. I think what Fyrestorm was saying, and I am sure you see this, is that it's easier to not have to deal with the circumcision issue when the father is intact. But I might also point out that there are many fathers/husbands of many members who saw eye to eye with their wives despite being circumcised.