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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm just wondering if anyone else is in this lonely boat. I'd love to find/give support! My Mom died 5 years ago at the age of 49, my whole family has fallen apart since (my Dad is very mentally unstable-addictions etc), and we have a real lack of support (my husband's mother/father just don't care and all my aunts are so busy with their own grandchildren). It's been a rough road. How I would love to have a wonderful extended family for my children <3 Can anyone else relate?
 

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Not sure it's the same... but my mother is an addict and has never been a mother, so I do consider myself motherless.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Oh Nic, I really do think it is so similar and I am sorry that you have been through that. I recall you lived with your Grandparents, are they still supportive?<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">
 

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I lost both my mom and my dad to cancer when they were in their 60's. My dad passed away 8 yrs ago and my mom passed away 2 yrs ago. My DS was conceived a few months after my mom died, and it made me so sad that they never got to meet each other. My mom had eight kids and loved babies! My oldest remembers her grandparents a little, but my other two will only know what I tell them. That's really tough for me. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> to both of you for being in the same boat.
 

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Yes Jodie, my grandparents raised me. So I'm lucky in that respect... my grandma is a lot like a mother, really the only true mother I ever had. They aren't being overly supportive of this pregnancy in general but no one has said anything negative (or positive) about it.<br><br>
I've found that with each baby I've had I've had to process my feelings about 'losing' my parents all over again. Each time seems to bring a deeper sense of healing. I think my situation is a bit different, given that my parents... my mother are still here and I can reach out to her but I choose not to most of the time in an act of self preservation. My heart hurts for those of you that had truly great women in your lives and lost them... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Ok. I am thread crashing. I am due in September/early October. Both of my parents are passed and so are my husband's. I used to jokingly say that my son had an elder deficit. But it is funny how things work out. My husband's ex-wife has become my son's grandma. My son just decided that he wanted a grandma type person and he picked someone out.<br><br>
My son has found Grandma Connie, Aunt Pam, Uncle Dave and we don't share DNA with anyone of them.<br>
Children are resilient. Your child will reach out and grab someone.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> to all of you.<br><br>
My mom died of breast cancer 4 years ago. I got pregnant with DS a short time later, and he was born on her dad's birthday, so we like to say that mom found a good baby for us and sent him down<br><br>
My situation is a bit different, though, in that my family is still relatively close (though they live far away) and very supportive. DH's parents are a bit TOO supportive and interested <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> but in a good way. They also live in another state.<br><br>
I do miss my mom, but never more so than when I have questions about her pregancies and births. Dad just doesn't remember/know some stuff!
 

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I'm sorry, Karen. My mom also died of breast cancer, after breastfeeding all eight of us and being very health-conscious all of her life. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/angry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="angry"><br><br>
My parents were both incredible people, and though I love my in-laws, it bothers me that my side of the family is missing from my kids' lives. My brothers and sisters are very much spread out as well, but still, it was never the same after mom and dad died anyway. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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Oh wow can I relate! I won't get into all the details of the family dynamic but I will say that my own mom passed away 7 years ago now from cancer and it so hard that she can't be here for me and our children (especially with each new life, I feel the pain of losing her comes back again).
 

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Yes I'm part of this group too. My mother passed away two weeks after I turned 15 from lung cancer, and my dad passed away two weeks before my 19th birthday from multiple health issues.<br><br>
My IL's can be way overbearing but I'm glad they are in our lives so we have some family. I have 5 brothers but hardly ever see them (and doubtful that I will seem some of them ever again after a huge fallout with one brother about how Fiona was "just a fetus" and how I "needed professional help").
 

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I don't know if this belongs here, but... My mom pretty much let me raise myself. I have some contact with her, but I wonder now if she really knows who I am, or if I really know her. Ever since I was a young child she was sorta "off". She wasn't always there emotionally or mentally, and she was physically, emotionally, and verbally abusive and it came in waves so I grew up not trusting her. Needless to say, our relationship is less than stellar. Her husband recently had her evaluated in the psychiatric ward. Turns out she has had psychosis all these years, and now they are trying to figure why.... could be schizophrenia, maybe bipolar. That explains a lot. Anyway, as a mom (or any other time), I have not had a "motherly" mother, but rather a distant relative.
 
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