[jackaroosmom]

My 22 month old ds was holding onto the back of the couch and jumping on the cushions next to me, which I was casually supervising. My dh was on the other side of the couch and telling ds to stop.

My mother happened to be there and when I said that I didn't have a problem with it as long as I was there to prevent a fall, they sorta ganged-up on me. She feels that he should not be allowed to behave that way, what would I do if we were at someones house.

I said that I felt it was just something he is experimenting with and I would not worry about it happening elsewhere. If it did happen I would gently explain that we don't jump on other people's furniture and redirect him to an "acceptable" activity! She thought that would be confusing. I think children adapt to the concept that different rules sometimes apply in different situations. I am not a wishy-washy pushover, I just think that jumping on the couch and the bed, which has been another bone of contention, are fun right now and why make a big deal out of it. He has never tried to do this without someone nearby and if he did, I would come to supervise. He has been trying to jump and hop on the floor and seems to find it easier to do on soft, cushy surfaces.

I am of course seeking validation, but I guess I need perspective here.
It just irks me to have my dh and mom against me when it is about parenting!

 

[CrazyCatLady]

My dd is 23 months and I don't let her jump on the bed, because she always falls off. But I do allow jumping on the couch. She's tried it out in public (like the couches at the bank). I just remind her to sit down please, I'll even do it for her if I have to and she'll usually stay after that. But we have worked on that at home, so she understands what it means to please sit down. So I don't think it's confusing to them (kids are smatter than we want to give them credit for), but they will need reminders that what is ok at home, might not be ok in public.

 

[Shelsi]

My ds who is 2 does the same thing but I don't allow him to do it. There are too many instances where I am in another room or taking a shower and might not be able to be there and make sure he doesn't hurt himself. Ever since he first learned to crawl up on the furniture we've used a "we always sit or crawl on furniture" rule. He tests it of course on occassion but it's worked quite well.

I think you are absolutely correct though that kids are adaptable. We also have another rule about not going into a certain tiny hallway of the house (because the dog's food and water are there). Sure enough though if we have a new sitter, when I get home he'll be messing with the dog's food and jumping all over the couch...because he knows the sitter may have different rules than I do. I don't see why a child wouldn't be able to figure out that you can jump on your own furniture but not someone else's. People forget that just because they can't communicate all that well they're not stupid. I don't think most adults give kids enough credit, kwim?

 

[Robin926]

It's not a big deal around here. DS jumps on the couch and the bed, and we just try to supervise and make sure he's okay. He never does it when I'm not right there with him.

I figured it was best to let him get it out of his system and not make a power struggle out of it. He's never tried jumping on the couch or bed at anyone else's house

:

 

[Cardinal]

We don't have a problem with it if we are standing right there supervising.

 

[Trishy]

My boys jump on the couch and the beds. I don't have a problem with it. They know that it isn't acceptable to do it at other people's house, just like it isn't acceptable to run around naked at other people's houses.

 

[kat85]

I don't let my dd because she might get badly injury and if I am right there what if I miss her by a second. And even though you right there, they might try it when you not around. Then I would hate for her to wear out the springs in my sofa or bed.

 

[Yooper]

I have no problem with couch jumping. Dd has been jumping on our couch since she was 18 months and has not once fell off. When she was smaller and I was more worried, I took the cushions off and put them on the floor in front of the couch. This made her closer to the ground and made a cushion for her she did fall. She even jumps unsupervised

: She spends about 20 minutes each morning jumping to Beastie Boys. Not sure what is so fun about that but she has been doing it for about a year.

Anyway, when at others houses, we have always just asked the hosts if they cared. Most do but some don't. When they do care, we simply told her that the rules in that house required that no one jumped on the couch. She was totally fine with that. Even at 18 months when she was pre-verbal. However, we are friends with parents of other toddlers or people with really crappy couches that did not care. Since dd knows we are asking and that we are trying to help her, she accepts whent he answer is no.

 

[Britishmum]

Lots of jumping in this house - and we've never had a problem at another house. I guess there have been some tumbles, but I teach some basic safety stuff and don't let it get too wild. No biggie in our house.

 

[Shanana]

I don't have a jumper (yet), but have spent some time thinking about this issue. I tend to think I won't mind, but the only thing that keeps niggling in my mind is something I saw at a friend's house ... she let her dd jump and roughouse on their sofa, which became a bit of a problem when she brought home her new baby. Her dd was 3+ years old when her ds was born, and dd was jumping and bouncing all over the place while mom was on the couch holding the baby, and came really close to falling on mom/baby several times. She was reprimanded repeatedly and eventually had to be sent out of the room because she wouldn't stop. Admittedly, this may have been her "acting out" because of the new sibling, but I also wonder if jumping on the couch had never been allowed, if it wouldn't have happened? Or maybe it would have been *worse* because it would have been a way she could REALLY get attention (almost falling on new baby brother + doing something that wasn't allowed even normally). So that's my only concern about permitting this type of activity, but like I said, I'm not even convinced that not permitting it would avoid this issue ...

 

[A&A]

It's really going to wear your furniture out faster. Perhaps buy a mini-tramp?

 

[moonpie's_mama]

i'm going to quote my mama here: "pick your battles. you can't play with knives, you can't play in the street; everything else is pretty much okay!"

my dd loves to bounce on the bed with her nana. i think all the pp's are right - kids can totally understand the concept of rules at home vs. rules at other people's homes. i hate feeling ganged-up on too.

 

[Maggies*Mommy]

I don't particularly like it-probably because my dad would never let me jump on the couch. BUT, I do let her do it. She loves it, gets excited and squeels with complete joy-I dont want to take that away from her.
As far as bed goes, she has done it a few times, but, prefers the couch.

 

[pookel]

We have no problem with couch and bed jumping in our house. If he's on the bed, we try to keep an eye on him and remind him to be careful if he's near the edge, and he hasn't fallen yet, but I'm not really worried. We have carpeted floors and a low bed, so I don't think he'd have more than a bit of a tumble if he fell off. We let him stand up in the rocking chair and climb on the coffee table too.

 

[MamaRabbit]

I'm surprised no one else has posted this irresistable comment...

Tom Cruise finds it perfectly acceptable!!

:

We jump here. Though she knows that it's okay only at home. She has to ask if it's OK at other people's houses.

 

[Pandora114]

Quote:

Originally Posted by A&A It's really going to wear your furniture out faster. Perhaps buy a mini-tramp?

:

I curbed my DD's enthusiasm for jumping on furnature because we REALLY dont feel like buying new stuff sooner than we have to because of the springs wearing out due to over exhuberant use, or springs poking into us or what have you.

Lots of places in the playground for her to jump on..

 

[faithnj]

I think the main issue is feeling unhappy when your parenting is challenged. Your parenting will always and forever be challenged, unless you raise a Nobel prize winner, or something. (And even in that case, if he/she dies of a drug overdose when he's 80, your parenting will still be blamed when your in the grave! LOL!) So decide what's important to you, listen to others, consider their points of view, and then do what you believe is best. It's not easy to grow tougher skin, but when it comes to parenting, people will always criticise, and you just can't win every argument.

Faith
(Who notice people ALWAYS have a negative comment, one way or another. The kid is to docile. The kid is too rambuctious. The kid is too friendly. The kid's not friendly enough. It never stops.)

 

[RedWine]

Jumping on the bed is okay at our house, but it's NOT okay to jump on the couch. We have an old couch and the springs can't take jumping.

 

[Robin926]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kannon99 Tom Cruise finds it perfectly acceptable!! :

:

:

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[sincitymama]

I let ds(2 1/2 yrs) jump on our beds nd furniture. Actually, most days we're lucky to find hte cushions still on the couch, due to him pulling htem off to make obstacle courses for himself where he jumps and flies around the living room from couch to chair to coffee table to pile of cushions and back

How much of htat I allow has grown proportionally to his coordination and skills. The only thing that makes me nervous is when he wants to jump on the big bed in the mastr bedroom-it's pretty high up and he's not *that* careful, so it's only ok when directly supervised.

He has never had a problem understanding that there are different rules at other peoples homes, and turning aunties living room into a circus ring is not allowed.