[Nora'sMommy]

My 14mo dd still wakes anywhere from 4-10 times a night. She's nursed/rocked to sleep and put in her crib by 7pm and stays asleep until 9 or 10pm. Then we go to bed (in the same room) and she's up frequently the rest of the night. If I don't think she wants to nurse dh rocks her to sleep, otherwise I nurse back to sleep. I get so tired, I sometimes bring her to bed with us, she falls asleep nursing but doesn't stay for long......She whines and squirms in discomfort a short while later, not necessarily looking for the boob. I don't know if it's a space issue or if she has to burp from nursing lying down? So back to the rocking chair, then the crib she goes. Even our good nights are too much for me to handle. I'm so worn out.<br>
I feel the solution to our problem is for dh to do all the night-time parenting, which we've tried. But I feel if I nurse her once or twice at night, she expects it every time she wakes. This is where I have a problem.<br><br>
I don't feel confident that dd is eating enough during the day to stop nursing her at night. So I have major mother-guilt when I deny my baby who is screaming for me at night, even though she is in her daddy's loving arms. I do all I can to get her to eat more during the day, even nurse more after meals, and before naps.<br><br>
Aside from waking from hunger we are working on putting her down semi-awake at bedtime, while by her side, to help her learn to put herself back to sleep (without crying). That's hit or miss lately.<br><br>
Any thoughts, experience?

 

[PatchyMama]

I wouldnt night wean her, she is too young. She is also at a very important age developmentally and does get a lot of her nutrition from night nursings. Is it possible she is sensitive to something in your/her diet? That can cause problems with sleep in toddlers. I would also keep her in your bed so that you can get the most amount of sleep while she is nursing. My dd is 16 months... she wakes up to nurse probably about 4 times a night but I barely wake up for it anymore, she is pretty good at latching on herself, LOL

 

[alegna]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> to you. I would agree that she is too young to night wean. I would try bringing her to bed all night with you for a few weeks and see if she settles down.<br><br>
-Angela

 

[CalBearMama]

My 16 month old DS has at least one waking each night during which he nurses like there's no tomorrow, so I tend to agree that 14 months may be too early to night-wean completely.<br><br>
As far as solutions for the frequent nightwakings, I'm sure I'm starting to sound like a broken record, but EC has been very beneficial for us. Here's what I said in response to another post (my apologies to those who have read it before):<br><br>
For my DS, restlessness at night is generally caused by a full bladder. He starts to wake up because he needs to pee, but if I just nurse him in bed, he will often go back to sleep without peeing and will therefore continue to be uncomfortable and thrashy. So nursuing perpetuates the discomfort and the repeated wakings rather than alleviating the problem. He will eventually pee in his diaper during one of his wakings and will then sleep soundly after that for a while, but it usually takes several hours of thrashing around and frequent waking/nursing before this happens.<br><br>
When DS was about 10 months old, I reached my limit of tolerance for restless sleep. After doing some reading, I learned about EC. It's not perfect, since we started kind of late, but practicing night-time EC has greatly reduced the unwanted activity in our family bed and helped us all get much better quality (and quantity) sleep. We've been doing it long enough now that I can generally tell whether he is waking to nurse (he really gets down to the business of eating) or waking to pee (he just flutter-sucks and starts to fall back asleep, but is twitchy and clearly uncomfortable). If it's a pee-waking, I take him off the breast, sit up in bed, latch him back on again in the cradle hold, get out of bed, sit on the side of the bathtub, remove his diaper and hold his bare bottom over the tub, and once the diaper is off, he will generally pee pretty quickly. Once the discomfort is relieved, he's much happier, has no trouble getting his diaper put back on, and nurses only very briefly to fall back to sleep. Last night, he slept from 11:00 to 5:30 (he nursed once during that time, but he didn't seem to need to pee, so I didn't get him out of bed). At 5:30, he woke up, nursed very briefly, and then sat up in bed and pointed at the bathroom. I took him to pee (his diaper was dry), briefly nursed him back to sleep, and then replaced his diaper. He continued sleeping until 8:30, woke up with a dry diaper, and then peed twice in the toilet within about five minutes of waking up (it usually takes two or more pees in the morning to fully empty his bladder).<br><br>
If you're interested in EC generally, check out <a href="http://www.diaperfreebaby.org" target="_blank">www.diaperfreebaby.org</a> or the elimination communication subgroup of the diapering forum here at MDC.<br><br>
Other possible causes of the poor sleep are teething, illness, developmental milestones, etc., but in our experience, those issues generally run their course pretty quickly (lots of night wakings for a few days, but then back to normal). It sounds like your situation is more long-term, so I wouldn't think any of these things would be causing it.

 

[mom2owen1]

my ds is 16 months and a frequent waker as well. things that have helped us:<br><br>
(1) EC, as pp mentioned. after some time of night ec'ing and (2) below, ds started staying dry all night.<br>
(2) eliminating dairy - he is sensitive to dairy and it was causing frequent urination and restless sleep in general<br>
(3) full time cosleeping<br><br>
we still have nightwakings, but he truely eats at each one, usually on both sides. nightwakings increase with teething, etc.<br><br>
i will also agree that he is too young to nightwean. i also believe nightweaning won't stop his wakings and then you will be left still up in the middle of the night without the boob to settle him back down.<br><br>
it is good your dh is an active nighttime parent!<br><br>
kris<br>
owen, 16 months<br>
edd 10/14

 

[momto l&a]

Teething makes them wake up alot at night to comfort nurse.<br><br>
My dd who is 16 months has some teeth coming in and many nights we are up 3-4 times a night. Every so often she sleeps 5-6 straight <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"><br><br>
I agree 14 months is way to early to night wean.

 

[pinuchkin]

I agree with PPs about the night weaning. But have you considered side-carring a crib for a while? Our 14 mo old is starting to want some space of her own at night, but also wants her cuddle times.

 

[zannster]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>PatchyMama</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">...she wakes up to nurse probably about 4 times a night but I barely wake up for it anymore, she is pretty good at latching on herself, LOL</div>
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This always amazes me when people say this. You're lucky! DS usually cries as he wakes up, which snaps me awake. I also have to make adjustments (I can't sleep all night on one side). I flip him to my other side and move the pillows around a bit. I usually go back to sleep fairly quickly, but it is nowhere near the same as sleeping straight through. I'm sure that my sleep cycle gets interrupted.<br><br>
OP - I'm right where you are, except that we don't have any rocking with Daddy. DS always nurses to sleep and wakes several times (I'd say 3-8 times). Also, he doesn't stay asleep long on his own, so I've always gone to bed with him. I need the sleep almost as badly as he does. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> I've committed to letting him nurse as much as he needs during the night until he's at least 18 months (assuming he keeps nursing that long). Then I'll reassess how we're both doing. He's so dependent on nursing for sleep, and it's so much more difficult to get him to sleep any other way (except the car, heh) that I'm afraid to wean him. Like a PP said, I'd probably have to deal with the waking and not have any magic bullet. I'd get much less sleep that way! Regarding being hungry...I'm pretty sure that he gets a good chunk of calories during the night. But I don't think that's why he wakes up. He wakes like we all do, and the goodies are right there.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">