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I would be hurt by that too and if it bothers you, don't pay for the tat. You can't force him to have your dd's name tattooed on him and unfortunatly you can't force him to get a symbol instead of your ds's name.
Is it possible that he thinks other people won't understand him getting his step-daughters name put on too? Or that he thinks that it 'just isn't done'? I'm just wondering because I don't understand what the problem with it would be. My husband...although technically step-father to my dd....still had her name included with our son's on his tat. He didn't even think twice about it. Maybe tell him that it isn't all that unusual.

However if the reason is that he doesn't want it on there because he doesn't feel the same way about your dd as your ds (which although sad, is understandable), there isn't much you can do about besides no pay for it. It is his body and his choice.

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