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Speaking as someone's step child with a sibling from the union of my mom with stepdad, it would have hurt me terribly as a child. It's not my fault who my biological parents are. It would seem to me that when your dh married you, he accepted fully all that came with you. For him to now express limits on his love for your daughter because she is not his flesh and blood is selfish and immature. Do adoptive parents love their adopted children any less then their biological? By and large no.... I know several families like this and you would never know who is adopted based on the love that is expressed to all the children. My stepfather seemed to feel threatened by the fact that my father was someone else. As I have grown I realize that much of his behavior was immature and perhaps he was not ready for such a relationship.
So don't protest if dh gets his tatoo the way he wants, but don't pay for it. It is his body and he can put what he wants on it. Just remember your daughter is your daughter and she deserves to know that you aren't supporting someone that works to exclude her from the safety of her home. Sorry, but I am speaking passionately as a child that went through such a relationship.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Justice2
I don't think he understands this very simple concept. He tells me that she has a father. And he is right and Justice is pretty close with (and talks about a great deal) her father. I just don't think that he understands how this would hurt her. In every other area of our *blended* relationship, things are great and *blended* rather well. It's just this one issue and to me it's a biggie.
Maybe I should leave this alone. But there are clearly greater issues....resentment of her dad still being in the picture. Not her fault, why make her pay? Justice2 you said earlier that his mentioning that she is not his daughter is the cause of many arguments. Please don't make light of the fact that there are other issues at play.
k I'll be quiet
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Greaseball
I think what's more troublesome than the tattoo is that he doesn't consider your dd to be his daughter. I hear a lot of remarried parents say they do consider the non-bio children to be their children, even if the bio-parents are still in the picture.

Amen to that!!!! The tattoo is the least of your worries.
 
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