Mothering Forum banner
1 - 4 of 4 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
651 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Dd1 recently started taking a nose dive when we thought we were starting to gain some ground again.

I just couldn't keep from crying this morning (right out of bed) when she kept telling us that she would stop throwing her fit when we stopped yelling at her. We weren't yelling at her I swear, I was trying to do my best to keep a nutral tone and I was trying to keep her from kicking the walls and bed frame because I don't want her to get hurt.

Dh seems to think that either we need to tighten up her schedual or that maybe she needs to have a fit a day to reset herself or something.

But what do you do with a child who when they get going can be a threat to their own safety and a threat to the safety of others. I can't have her out of my ssite when she gets really worked up but I can't have her around her brother and sister. She's almost too big to bear hug until the worst has passed and the fit is out of her system, but I'm afraid that if I don't she'll really hurt herself as she puts herself into positions where she could get hurt bad.
It doesn't help that it feels like she's trying to push us away. For the last week she has beent elling me that I don't love her because...(fill in with reason usually starting eith "you won't let me"). When she gets into a fit she'll throw, kick, and try to break anythinn inanimate that is near her. If her brother is perseived to be the cause of her fit then she'll do everything she can to hurt him as badly as she can (he has a couple of scars and his gaurdian need a raise for all the over time!!!). I'm scared to death that she'll start treating Dd2 the same way. She's started treating me the same way that she treats her brother the only differance is that she *really* has to be throwing a fit before she will do it and I have to be distracted.

She's a good kid when she's happy. I know that all of this can't be for a lack of knowing what the boundries are with the household rules. The rules have always been the same. She hasn't always been like this either. It just seems to be getting worse with age.
As of yesterday we have started the process with a clinic to see if we can't get everything sorted out as to just what is going on. Only problem is that we are just starting the *long* list of paperwork to get on the waiting list. Once we are on the waiting list it will be about six months before we get in, give or take.
I've been told that there is a wonderful OT very close to us who is great at helping with sensory problems, and she is suppost to be in the phone book, but I have yet to find a number for her, We know that our insurance won't cover herr because she is private but when everything is going you know where in a hand basket you don't want to do anything half assed right? *sigh*

I just don't know what to do anymore. For every good thing that happends it seems that at least two other things go completely wrong. Wee are having problems finding a new place to rent when our lease is up because with the way that Dd1 has been getting we don't want to move into an apartment and have to have people on the other side of a wall trying to cope with all the noise that Dd1 can put out when she's worked up. We don't want to live in a place that doesn't have an enclosed yard because Dd1 has taken to wandering off, she can just dissapear, one minute she's playing where you can see her and then you turn your head to take care of one of the other kids and poof she's gone. But, then I worry that one of these days she is going to put her foot through a wall or a door or a window or something and how do you explain that to a landlord when you don't know what is going on with your child?

OK I have to go and try to get the day back on track at least for Ds, Dd2 is still little enough that she could care less. Hopefully Dh is right and Dd1 will be reset moodwise to get through the rest of the day.

Sorry for the pitty party, I know that there are others who really need the support right now. I just had to get some stuff off my chest. I just is feeling impossible to keep myself together.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
651 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Color me completely confused!

Dd1 has spent all afternoon appologising for how she acted this morning. It started with her coming to me around lunch time and saying that she was sorry and every so often after she would come back in to say it again. She'll even be starting to cry she's so upset about it. Before she came to talk to me she was still in a funk and was verbally taking it out on her sibling but mostly Ds. I didn't do anything more then tell her that she needed to be nice.

She's been in a much better mood since she apologised and we talked about how I do what I do to keep her safe and that it is the same with Dh. She can't put into words how she feels when she gets into a fit, but I think that it scares her. I don't expect for her to be able to explain it to me since she is only 5yo. She did say that it happends when she gets angry so that is a start. I had made the connection between the fits and strong emotions like anger, fear and sadness.

After seeing me crack this morning Dh is actively trying to help figure things out and we have started communicating about how things are going when he is at work so that he is up to date and not getting a glossed over veiw of the day.

I'm going to be looking into information for us to read on differant therapies that we might be able to start at home. We need to bone up on the sensory intigration stuff but it's been kind of hard since what Dd needs to do have have done changes on an almost daily basis. I know for Christmas we will be getting her headphones so that she she's getting over loaded that will at least cut down on the sound for her. I'm going to get Dh to start practicing sign language with me so that we are both at the same level then it won't be up to me to do the signing. I'm also looking into RDI, relationship development intervention therapy. It sounds like it might be good for us to use as a family since the stress of things seems to be causing some relationship issues between Dd and the rest of us.

But, long story short I'm confused. No of this makes sense.
 
1 - 4 of 4 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top