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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm currently in the second trimester and I honestly can tell you that I haven't felt like my regular self since probably about the time I got the ++ pregnancy test. The first trimester was a nightmare. I was crying every day, felt trapped inside my house, lashed out at everyone I knew, etc. Then around week 12-13 or so, it cleared up and I felt a little better, but I still don't really think I'm all the way better. I feel emotionally distanced from every person and thing in my life, like I'm going through the motions but not really there, if that makes sense. Everything is on my nerves all the time. I have little to no patience with my kids -- I'm still going through the motions of gentle discipline but I feel like the words are coming out of someone else's mouth. I hate going to sleep at night and I hate getting up in the morning. I feel like I'm still able to put on a good show and act like everything is normal, but inside I just don't really feel "there". I don't even know if that makes sense.<br><br>
Is this regular pregnancy anxiety? I don't remember it happening with my other two. Or is there some kind of "pregnancy depression" that you can get? I hate feeling this way but I don't know what to do to stop it. I'm taking a prenatal with plenty of B-complex vitamins in it, getting exercise, and eating well. I don't know what else to do.
 

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Yes, ante-natal depression is very real and happens just as often as postpartum depression. It's just not as widely accepted yet by society! I'm 29 weeks pregnant and it's gotten very bad for me. After talking to doctors and several organizations, I've decided to go on zoloft. It has been a very difficult decision for me, but I don't feel that there is any other choice right now. I have the same feelings as you; feeling disconnected from everyone and everything. I haven't bonded at all with this baby yet (I just looked at myself in the mirror last week and was shocked that I looked pregnant). I've also had a lot of aggression and anger and have actually started having intrusive thoughts. That was the point where I realized that I needed some help. It's been really frightening, but I know we'll get through it.<br>
I hope things don't get that bad for you and you start feeling better soon!
 

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I had it with ds <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> so I went on meds from 9weeks till 7months went off so that the baby would be free of the med before birth then went back on for a while for ppd.
 

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Yes, there is. I have it, too. Talk to your caregiver and/or a phychiatrist or psychologist. I haven't gone on meds, b/c of some other beliefs and issues, but if you find they work for you, go for it. Otherwise, find ways to take care of yourself emotionally, since it does effect your physical health, even though you're exercising and eating right. Find supportive family and friends, or even a PPD support group. Someone else here told me you can go when you're pregnant, too, not just for postpartum depression. Perhaps an LLL meeting/leader would help too. Don't let people tell you it's normal! It's not. And don't hold everything in and let it go untreated either. I did that for a while, and the results were awful! I almost aborted the baby and hurt myself. Fortunately, DH noticed how horrible I was and made me stay in the room and talk about it. Or yell and cry about it, as the case was. It helped, but don't let it get that bad. :-(
 

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<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-partum_depression" target="_blank">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-partum_depression</a><br><br>
ante-natal depression is mentioned very breifly in the first paragraph under 'diagnosis'. it is very real, hope you find the help you need
 

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Yes, I had depression <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: all through my first two pregnancies and lactation (as well as the miscarriages before and in between). The main treatments that helped me out were crystal therapy (chakra balancing therapy) and going on the FAILSAFE diet (see <a href="http:" target="_blank">www.fedupwithfoodadditives.info)</a>. Homoeopathy also helped, after the first trimester.<br><br>
I was amazed when I was pregnant with my third, because I was so happy all the way through! (That seemed very weird to me! Pregnancy = misery, yes?) But I wasn't depressed with my fourth either (had other probs though). I can't seem to pinpoint why I was depressed with two, and not with the other two. Why do hormones play up for one pregnancy and not for another, I wonder?<br><br>
Ah, but the joy of that newborn is worth it all! Do you agree? There is something addictive about the rush you get straight after you've pushed the baby out! After everything I've gone through in pregnancy in labour, the old brain so quickly forgets the misery and remembers that brief but amazing moment of ecstacy!
 

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for those that have gone thru pregnancy with this - did you bond with your babies after without problems - or at least without a lot of problems?<br><br>
DH and I tried for 5 months before getting PG. The first month was pure hell and I had severe lows and some suicidal thoughts - extremely brief moments, but there all the same. I stopped trying to explain it when eveyone dismissed my emotions. the depression lifted somewhat after that first month, but never went away completely. For a time of life that's supposed to glowing and wonderful, I am still somewhat disconnected and guarded. I am hoping that it passes without becoming PPD, however I am concerned that I will have problems bonding with the baby.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks, everybody. I am having kind of a bad morning and it was nice to read the helpful replies. I just feel like such a failure right now. My kids have been watching TV all morning and I just don't have the energy or motivation to go anywhere with them or even into the back yard. (Plus which it's a little too cold anyway, but still.)<br><br>
I am really, really, really reluctant to do meds during pregnancy but on the other hand, I keep thinking, is it really fair to my children/DH for me to be in this state so much of the time? I don't know. I'm not even really sure who I would talk to. Maybe I'll look around locally for a PPD support group. I didn't even know such things existed.
 

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They just did a thing on depression during pregnancy on the Today show the other day. It is becoming much more widely accepted. Good luck, I had it during my last preg. and didn't realize it until after he was born, I never said anything to my midwife until I was struggleing with PPD, she told me she wished I would have said something sooner.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JanB</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7263660"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Thanks, everybody. I am having kind of a bad morning and it was nice to read the helpful replies. I just feel like such a failure right now. My kids have been watching TV all morning and I just don't have the energy or motivation to go anywhere with them or even into the back yard. (Plus which it's a little too cold anyway, but still.)</div>
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Hugs to you, mama. I'm in tears reading this because it's exactly how I'm feeling, too. I don't have children yet, this is my first baby, and I'm due next month. I truly feel this baby is coming to meet us early, but I am not ready in SO many ways. Not physically or emotionally, and I feel spiritually disconnected from everyone, including the baby.<br>
No words of advice, just a hug.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JanB</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7263660"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Thanks, everybody. I am having kind of a bad morning and it was nice to read the helpful replies. I just feel like such a failure right now. My kids have been watching TV all morning and I just don't have the energy or motivation to go anywhere with them or even into the back yard. (Plus which it's a little too cold anyway, but still.)<br><br>
I am really, really, really reluctant to do meds during pregnancy but on the other hand, I keep thinking, is it really fair to my children/DH for me to be in this state so much of the time? I don't know. I'm not even really sure who I would talk to. Maybe I'll look around locally for a PPD support group. I didn't even know such things existed.</div>
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<br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br>
I know it's difficult to know what to do. Deciding to take meds was the most difficult decision of my life. I was very anti-meds before having kids and refused treatment for years. But now that I have a family, I have to think about them too. It's been a week and a half and I don't feel dramatically better yet, but the violent thoughts have gone away, which feels really good. But I do worry every day about my baby. I don't think that there's a right answer. After weeks of wanting someone else to make the decision for me, I realized that I have to make it myself.
 
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