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Can a child be too old for co-sleeping?<br><br>
My son is 9, and has co-slept probably 90% of the time with me since around 4 months old. We are about to move in with family and will all be in one room (Me and my kids) so my 9 year old will still be co-sleeping for years to come. I personally see nothing wrong with this, but was wondering if co-sleeping had guide lines, or age limits?
 

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I am watching this thread with interest. Our 8 yr old dd still co-sleeps with us. Part of the reason why (besides that we all still enjoy it and feel it's right for us) is that this is a small house, and the family bedroom is the only bedroom that is actually quiet.<br><br>
Her "bedroom" (where all her clothes, books & toys are), is adjacent to the front door. The door makes a lot of noise when it opens and closes, and we have several pets who go in and out that door anytime anyone is awake. Plus, if she is sleeping in, like on the weekends, we are likely to have someone knock at the door while she is still asleep. Not to mention my dh and I going out & in the door after she goes to bed at night, or before she wakes up in the morning.<br><br>
The only other "bedroom" in the house is also very noisy (due to being too central in the house - too close to the living area, and too close to the neighbors' barking dogs). We've converted it into a study/office/library/second living area.<br><br>
I'm fairly sure that no one has set age limits on co-sleeping. I would think that any "expert" that would be open enough to advocate co-sleeping, would also be open to letting the families choose for themselves when to stop. And the ones that don't advocate co-sleeping aren't worth listening to, IMO.<br><br>
All three of us usually sleep very well.<br>
Ann-Marita
 

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Rain is 11... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
dar
 

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Discussion Starter #4
Do you think there will be any psychological problems if a child co-sleeps for a very long time? I guess I am worried about my son being 17 and still co-sleeping!<br><br>
I just love that your dd name is Rain. That is so pretty!
 

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I'm thinking that if your son gets married and wants to bring his wife home to co-sleep, then you've got a problem. Until then, I don't see anything wrong with it. I remember my half-sister still sleeping with her mom when she was 10.
 

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I don't worry, no... I think historically, it's sleeping alone that's weird.<br><br>
Rain does go on sleepovers and campouts and stuff where she sleeps alone, or at least in her own bed or sleeping, and she has slept in her own room and bed occasionally. It just seems nicer this way... we usually have a dog or cat (or both) in bed, too.<br><br>
Rain actually chose her own name a couple of years ago... I'll tell her that you liked it <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
Dar
 

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I crawled into my mothers bed until I was about 12 years old every night. I think I turned out OK <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">
 

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Does anyone else (besides me) think that having a small family has something to do with it? I mean, in a family with several children, when a child moves out of the family bed (parent's bed), there would be other children to sleep with. But we have an only child, so she either sleeps with one or both of us, or she sleeps alone.<br><br>
(I say one or both of us because I sometimes have trouble sleeping, and will go lay down in dd's room if I feel that my tossing & turning is effecting dd and dh's sleep.)<br><br>
Ann-Marita
 

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My son just moved into his own bed at age 14. It was a very abrupt transition--one night he just moved out into another room. He slept on the floor for about a month while we procrastinated about a bed. (Writing this now, it sounds so dramatic--like maybe something had happened--but really he's just a very VERY decisive person.)<br><br>
I know a family who didn't have a family bed who still have occasional night visits from their 17 year old. These are people who are NOT happy with co-sleeping, but the kid needs that closeness occasionally and is healthy enough (IMHO) to demand it.
 

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I don't think any age is too old. Our 7yo dd sleeps with us and we are all 3 comfortable and happy. She has her own room with her own bed and she knows that she can choose to sleep in it any time she wants. She just always chooses the family bed. If she has a friend sleep over then they sleep on a futon in the living room or they sleep in her bed together. She'll be welcome in our bed for as long as she wants.<br><br>
BTW, I co-slept with my Mom when I was a teenager (not as a young child though). I was going through some insecurity issues around 16 or 17 and often chose to sleep in her bed. She didn't put up with me for very long but for the times that she did it made me feel safe, secure and loved. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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If you are happy, and your child is happy, I don't think there are any set rules. The whole point of being AP is parenting to the needs of your child, right? If your child needs to sleep next to you, and you are comfortable with it then you should do it.
 
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