Is this an okay way to wean older child?

594 Views 3 Replies 3 Participants Last post by Sustainer, Jun 8, 2004

annonemus21

Discussion Starter · Jun 8, 2004

My ds is now 4 and 4 mos. old and still nurses a LOT. The constant demands are beginning to grate on my nerves and my dh is uncomfortable with it. Actually, no one outside of our family knows we still nurse. He asks in the mornings, at nap, at bedtime or when he needs comforting. I have tried to wean periodically unsuccessfully. Nursing has continued to help him through times of stress and being sick. Now I would just like to move on. I would like to lose weight and think that maybe if I weren't nursing so much I could better control my appetite. Also, I am afraid that if he tells someone, it may become an issue. ( Why I am annonymous here too) I am a little reluctant to say goodbye to this aspect of our relationship because he is an only child and so there will be no more babies for me. Otoh, I don't want to let him keep nursing because I am sad there will be no more babies. Physically impossible for me. I have explained to him that all of his friends are finished nursing too, he doesn't care.

Anyway, he really wants a pet so I told him if he can stop nursing, he can get a kitten. I explained that kittens need to nurse while they are little but when they are old enought to stop nursing, they can go to a new home. Of course I told him he will staying our home but he won't need nursing any longer. So, when the kitty is ready to come to our house (no more nursing) and he is ready to stop nursing, we can get a pet?

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ja mama

· #2 · Jun 8, 2004

I think that sounds fine. Are you going to let him choose when to stop nursing and get a kitten, or will the kitten just show up and the boob access be denied because of your decision? Do you have a backup plan if he decides the kitten wasn't worth the sacrifice? Does the kitten go (where would it go?), and he can have his nursing back, or is it a perm thing no matter what? Does he know that? Can it be a party for him and kitten together. Kitten is big enough to stop nursing and come live with him, and he is done nursing and gets to help take care of the kitten and snuggle it when he wants comfort?

But, I've never weaned a 4 year old. I was done at 2 with both.

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annonemus21

Discussion Starter · #3 · Jun 8, 2004

Good thoughts ja mama. We have been talking about this for a few months now. Today he decided today was the day. So he picked out a beautiful kitten at the humane society and we saw a big mama cat in the cage next door to it. I showed him the mama cat's tummy and said "see, she used to nurse her kitties too but now they don't need to nurse, they can eat food and go to a new home." We are going to get a cake and have a party tonight too.

IF he really had a traumatic moment and needed to nurse, I guess I would and not make the kitten go back... Anyway, so far so good. He is happy with his new friend.

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Sustainer

· #4 · Jun 8, 2004

Breastfeeding is actually good for weight loss. If you stop breastfeeding, it might actually become harder to lose weight.

Also, if it were me, I wouldn't let my dp pressure me. My breastfeeding relationship is between me and my child.

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