It is over

627 Views 9 Replies 9 Participants Last post by brusselsprout, Jun 17, 2004

brusselsprout

Discussion Starter · Jun 11, 2004

I just got the call that my divorce has been finalized. I want this to be an upbeat here is to the new me post, but I just can't do it.

Seriously, I can't stop crying, and when I am not crying I am throwing up. I can't find my ex anywhere (was trying to find him before this to get some tax paperwork for school) so I can't tell him. I called my "best-friend" and she told me "Well, you can call him here tonight". Sunday is our anniversary. I don't know why but I just feel like I would have dealt with this alot better if we had been able to make it past then.

Anyway....here is to the new me, with the new name, and the new life......

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L.J.

· #2 · Jun 11, 2004

to you.
I know there's probably nothing I can say to help make it easier for you.
I guess I just wanted to say, I'm here for you.
I think it's good that you're getting it all out. It's part of the process & I think you'll feel better more quickly if you just let the emotions flow.
You've always got support here.
~ L.J.

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toepea

· #3 · Jun 12, 2004

I found out my divorce was final a couple of days before our anniversary too, and it was a very emotional day for me also. I had thought that I would want to party when it really became final, but that certainly wasn't the case. It's a weird feeling to be trying to get there and then get so sad and emotional when it finally arrives. I can't say anything to really help you, darn it.

BUT, I would like to say a thing or two or three to your "best-friend"......... ARGH!!!

:

Feel what you feel, and time will help.

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mocha09

· #4 · Jun 12, 2004

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PikkuMyy

· #5 · Jun 12, 2004

Hugs!!!!

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Erin

· #6 · Jun 12, 2004

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Holland73

· #7 · Jun 12, 2004

Unfortunately, L.J. is correct, it is all a part of that lovely "process"!

I think so many people believe that once the papers are signed, that somehow all the crap will be finally "resolved". But, they are just papers, a legality, that is it! All the crap, hurt, anger, etc are still there...if anything, those papers just remind you about all of those feelings.

So, I am imagine that everything is very, very sad for you. I expect I would be feeling the same exact way when my time comes. So, cry, vent and feel those emotions! They are healthy and they will help!!!! Just imagine we are all there crying with you, because that is what we are all doing!

PS...my anniversary was also this week. And on that day, my stbx was surprising his new girlfriend with this very elaborate Welcome home display (so nice of him to tell me about it!

). Last time he picked me up from the airport, he told me about her and that our marriage was 150% over!

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comet

· #8 · Jun 13, 2004

I'm a few steps behind you. I signed the papers last week, he says he'll sign them on Monday. I know that I have put off dealing with the emotions until the divorce was final. It's been such a fight to get this settled, all my energies have gone there, and to raising my girl, of course. And our anniversary was yesterday.

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SingleDad

· #9 · Jun 14, 2004

Big Hugs Brussel, I'm sorry it's so hard on you. I agree with the Momma's on here though, it's just a part of the healing process that you have to go through. We're always here for ya.

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brusselsprout

Discussion Starter · #10 · Jun 17, 2004

Thanks for the hugs and encouragement!!! He is currently doing everything he possibly can to upset me, saying the most mean nasty thngs, so I am feeling very much like I did the right thing. In fact this pacifist mama would prolly plant a boot in his rear if he was on this side of the country!

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