[Soul-O]

I'm finally divorced! We finished up at 4:30pm yesterday, but all orders are in place. Here's the brief recap:<br><br>
Support: A total of $1202 per month (c/s, s/s, childcare) to be paid 1/2 on the 1st and 1/2 on the 15th<br><br>
Custody: Joint legal, sole physical to me with a 75/25 time share in my favor<br><br>
Visitation: ex has eowe with Ethan from Friday at 5pm to Sunday at 5pm. Adam goes Sat at 2pm to Sun at noon. Kids also go Wednesday from 5pm to Thursday at 8am.<br><br>
Property equalization: ex owes me $8,000 total - reimbursement of legal fees, equalization of community property, daycare expense arrears. He will pay $4,000 now, then pay the rest in monthly increments.<br><br>
I'm not entirely thrilled with the settlement, but it's OK and I'm pleased to be done with the court stuff.<br><br>
The bad news.....<br><br>
I might possibly lose my job, as I was out three days and didn't keep up with voice mail and e-mail - boss is very upset with me <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">. I'm doing my best to make up for it today, however, and will work as hard as necessary to keep my job.<br><br>
Thanks for all of the well wishes. I am looking forward to this new, single, chapter of my life!

 

[mocha09]

Oh, Tabitha. I am so glad it's over. (It took you long enough to update us! I was checking back here constantly yesterday!)<br><br>
I would hope that your boss would realize that you were, uh, IN COURT for 3 days, and give you a break.

 

[AngelBee]

Oh Tabitha....I am glad it is over. Congrats!<br><br>
I hope all works out with your job! You are in my thoughts and prayers!

 

[mistymama]

Overall, that's very good news!! I know you are so happy to have this over and done with! Woo Hoo!!<br><br>
I hope your boss will cut you some slack and understand how emotionally draining court is ... I know I have a hard time concentrating on work whenever anything like that is going on.<br><br>
I think you need to go out and celebrate with 'W'. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">

 

[Seasons]

WHEW, Tabitha. I'm SO glad it's OVER for you!

 

[Ahappymel]

.....<br>
Woohoo, Woohoo, Woohoo!<br><br>
Congratulations and good luck with the boss <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">

 

[Violeta]

Congratulations!!! i have such a long way to go, it's been only 3 months. i wanted to ask you how you got the sole physcial custody?

 

[littleaugustbaby]

COngratulations Tabitha!!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I hope it all works out with the boss.

 

[meco]

Tabitha,<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"> That is great for you!! I am glad it is over.<br><br>
I hope you are happy with it.<br><br>
I also hope your boss lays off and you keep your job <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">

 

[Soul-O]

Thanks everyone! On the plus side, the boss and I are OK at this point. He apologized for getting so upset with me, and I promised to do a better job of keeping up on my obligations when I have to be out of the office in the future. On the minus side, the ex is already whittling away at his required visitation. He is supposed to have Ethan this whole week, starting yesterday, for Christmas break. He is not picking him up until 7pm tomorrow, then is delivering him back to me on Wednesday for the night, then has both kids from Thursday until Friday a.m. I am happy to keep Ethan with me, but the time share should be adjusted (and support increased) if he is not going to take his visitation. Ah well.... at least I have my sweetie with me for a few extra nights to enjoy the holidays - it is definitely worth it!

 

[Soul-O]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Violeta</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Congratulations!!! i have such a long way to go, it's been only 3 months. i wanted to ask you how you got the sole physcial custody?</div>
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Hi Violeta:<br><br>
According to the judge, California does not have a provision for joint physical custody unless the timeshare is 50/50. Therefore, the primary custodial parent is deemed to have sole physical custody with reasonable visitation to the other parent. I'm also the primary decision maker with regards to joint legal custody - i.e. if there is a disagreement with regard to a decision to be made about the children, I am the tie breaker.

 

[paloma]

Yay, Soul-O, Yay!<br><br>
I aspire to be where you are.

 

[Holland73]

Congratulations!<br><br>
It is nice having the paper stating that it is "officially" over and provides with you a "guideline" on what is expected, legally, from your X.