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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am fortunate. Our separation is going ok. The kids are beginning to fall apart after 6 months of separation and that worries me BIG time, but we are civil and the bill collectors aren't at my door. They are, however, at his which also scares me.<br><br>
I need a "real" job and have had huge stress even working part-time because my kids keep getting sick and I have to ask stbx to watch them and ... stresses me to the max.<br><br>
But, it is the little things that add up -- like him sending their clothes home with them for *me* to wash. If they were here every day, yes, I'd wash them, of course, but geesh is he ever getting a free ride (just what he wanted) ..<br><br>
I buy everything for the kids and then send it over to his place. This has included medicine, food, clothes (and I don't mind that), but geesh ... it's like a teenager coming home with his dirty laundry.<br><br>
Ok, vent over. Like I said; small stuff.<br><br>
The big stuff, like the job situation, the suffering of my kids -- now, that is gonna kill me, literally, I think.<br><br>
M
 

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Oh man, can I relate!!! Seriously. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Hey, at least he sends the clothes back with them ... my life is a continual effort to dress dd in clothes I don't care if I ever see again on days her father is going to pick her up from school!!!
 

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I'm sorry............... Why can't there be some way to just transfer some of this stuff to him? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
It's no big deal; I guess it just sums up the whole thing -- among other things, he just didn't want to have all the responsibilities of husband and parent -- sending home the kids' dirty laundry just speaks volumes -- and he has gotten what he wanted, too.<br><br>
On a practical level -- I *did* send him clothes to keep ... the migrate back here for washing, nonetheless :).<br><br>
Like I said, it's small potatos. The big potatos are what is killing me ...<br><br>
sigh<br><br>
Oops, kids are home!<br><br>
M
 

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hang in there <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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The small potatoes add up though, don't they? I know the feeling of just wanting everything to be settled and go well, already. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> As far as the job, I think it would be better to have the kids in a good daycare or preschool than with stbx that much (since that stresses you, there is a good reason for your stress!). Ds is doing great in preschool although I was a sahm for almost 3 years. Just a thought! Then you can be financially independent of stbx and not worry about his credit or income. It'll take a bit of the stress off, I think.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Al Dente</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10271061"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">The small potatoes add up though, don't they? I know the feeling of just wanting everything to be settled and go well, already. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> As far as the job, I think it would be better to have the kids in a good daycare or preschool than with stbx that much (since that stresses you, there is a good reason for your stress!). Ds is doing great in preschool although I was a sahm for almost 3 years. Just a thought! Then you can be financially independent of stbx and not worry about his credit or income. It'll take a bit of the stress off, I think.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"></div>
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Thanks for the support.<br><br>
They are both in school full-day, but when they are sick--they gotta be at home.<br><br>
Since I just started this job -- Dad has been kind enough to take time off from work to watch them. The one day I did take off for a sick kid, the director was none to pleased (sigh) -- I tried to explain that 4 out of the 7 days I worked one child had been sick and yet I had come to work because stbx had watched them -- I had actually done her great service.<br><br>
The stress comes from not being able to stay home with a sick child guilt-free.<br><br>
Thanks a ton for caring!<br><br>
M
 
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