[~Megan~]

my sil had her first child last Wednesday. Milk came in on Saturday.

She's having a lot of problems with nursing. She says the lactation nurse told her to wait till his mouth is really wide open and then quickly put him to breast. She says when she does this he gets really mad and just screams with the nipple in his mouth. I'm thinking she's waiting too long. Any other thoughts.

He's got all the other newborn things going on as well (super sleepy, nursing often and for a long time).

She sounds really dedicated, even mentioned pumping for him exclusively - but we all know how long exclusive pumping usually lasts, and I need to get her some help.
I'm taking her to LLL on Wednesday morning but any info I can get to her tomorrow is even better.

TIA

 

[lauraess]

I'd say to consider fragrances that she might be wearing, or simply that he really is picking up on her 'nervous' vibe. I totally believe they sense this in mom because: 1: they are so spiritually connected to her at this time and 2: they could be extra sensitive, as in one of those perhaps high-needs, sensitive to lights, sounds, textures, temp etc.
I would suggest her getting some massages from partner if possible, drinking some soothing tea, eating oatmeal, listening to very meditative and soothing music and beginning to establish a nursing routine to ready him for nursing.
And lastly= JUST HANG in THERE

 

[Plaid Leopard]

Perhaps she could try some different positions to see if they work better for getting him on the breast.
What happens when she doesn't wait for him to open his mouth wide? Does he not latch on at all or just not correctly? How is she encouraging him to open his mouth wide? Does she tickle his cheek a bit with her nipple? Maybe she is pushing him a bit too forcefully/too quickly to the breast. Perhaps if he latches on but incorrectly she can pull down his lower lip with her finger to make sure that his lips are flanged out and opened wide enough.
It is really hard to say what might be going on without actually seeing mama and babe in action, so to speak.
You know, you can always call a LLL leader and see if she can come by your SILs house before Wednesday to help her. One leader did that for me when I was having trouble nursing my 2nd baby.

It's great that you are trying to help your SIL.

 

[jerawo]

Those first few (or more) weeks can be hard. I would suggest that she spend a day in bed shirtless with an almost naked baby. This really helps the mom and the baby learn to BF better. Good for you in helping your SIL out and keeping her away from exclusively pumping.

 

[Lisa P]

I had a similar problem when dd was born. Two things were going on...I was not recognizing dd's signs that she was hungry early enough (missed the hands to mouth, tongue out, head turning stuff) and was only ralizing she was hungry when she started to fuss. Very hard to learn how to BF for the first child with a fussy baby. So sugguest trying to BF before the baby is so hungry its fussing. Also, I read everything I could get a hold of about how to BF so I'd know just what to do... didn't save me from having problems. I realized, and perhaps you SIL is doing what I did, that when I was placing the nipple in dd's mouth, I was aiming it down her throat. The nipple should be aimed toward the roof of the baby's mouth, generally. Also, starting the process of latching on with the baby positioned so the nipple is pointing at the baby's nose or eys (dependeing on which hold is being used) will put the baby in the best position to latch on properly.

Good luck! It will get better. It took me 3 weeks to get the kinks worked out...tell your SIL to have heart!

 

[Plaid Leopard]

SHe can also gently pull down on babies chin and say "open" as he is opening his mouth, and show him by opening her mouth wide.

 

[gottaknit]

I remember having trouble getting DS to open his mouth wide enough the first week or so (my boobs were sooo HUGE and his mouth so tiny). What helped me was looking at as many pictures as possible of correct and incorrect latch. I also found videos online of newborns latching on.... I think at Kellymom... I'll look for them and provide links.

She might be a little engorged and it makes it tough for baby to latch. Has she tried hand expressing a little first to soften the breast?

Another issue we had in the beginning was after I took my first shower, DS didn't recognize my scent (the hospital had stinky soap). Tell her not to use soap anywhere near her chest.

ETA links:
Hunger cues and latching on

Kellymom video links

 

[~Megan~]

thanks everyone. I called her and she said he was doing better last night and this morning.
Hopefully she'll still want to go to LLL tomorrow