[Stumom]

I am a new poster/reader, referred here by a support line. I am going absolutely crazy, because I've had to suddenly wean my almost 3 year old, and it has been emotionally devastating for both of us. I always planned to let him decide, but when we went to have our discussion about the embryo transfer, our Dr. told us that the progesterone injections would immediately dry up my milk. I though that was kind of handy because I could then explain to my son that they weren't working and then he could still suck for comfort if he wanted to. Well, it didn't happen that way. The milk kept coming and it still is, but I've had to stop breastfeeding the day of the embryo transfer because they told me it would endanger the pregnancy to keep breastfeeding. We stopped cold turkey, but not without some gentle preparation involving my son's ideas for what we can do instead. He has been wonderfully adaptive, in asking for the alternatives, but the poor guy is desperate for control and the situation is making our lives miserable. Everything I do is done the wrong way or has to be done over, and I even suspect the development of a nervous tic (eyes widening then blinking.) This combined with being pumped full of estrogen and progesterone is making us all crazy. Does ANYONE have any ideas or supportive words of wisdom? I hate not being able to comfort my son the way we're used to. We are all grieving the loss of "having mimis". and I feel as if both our hearts have been ripped out.

 

[Stumom]

Hello, just an update...I decided that since my son is here now, I needed to take care of him and my family, so we resumed breastfeeding on the 21st, exactly a week since we stopped. The changes are remarkable, although not unexpected. I will let you all know the results of our pregnancy test on the 28th. I guess a week for the embryo(s) to implant was more helpful than nothing. It seems to me that after searching, there just isn't any evidence either way, and that some just want to be as cautious as possible to increase the odds no matter what. I really appreciate the support and links, and I'm glad I found this board. Thanks!
Bonnie

 

[Stumom]

Well, my pregnancy test (stick and blood test) came back negative. I feel relieved, sad, confused about the breastfeeding because I'll never know the real answer, and unsyre what to do if our last 3 embryos are viable. Part of me says to follow the non breastfeeding while trying to get pregnant advice, and part of me feels like I'm being tricked into it orjust unsupported by undereducated fertility doctors. I just don't know what I will do in January when we try again. Any thoughts?
Bonnie