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Discussion Starter #1
Hey. Watup. I need a drink. Anyone want to join me?<br><br><br><br><br>
(We have yet to buy our first post-Pesakh bottle of Jack, so it's going to be a boring drink. Arak we have. Yuck. Or more accurately, boring. Sigh.)<br><br><br><br><br>
DS#1 stayed home sick today. I tried, really tried, to get him to want to watch "Star Wars" on TV. He didn't want to. Am not sure why, but that seriously bummed me out.<br><br><br><br><br>
And lastly, this evening had IMs with a close friend (in the process of finishing her aliya to Tzfat, but anyway) who talked me into calling the NbN social services people in re DH and his "attitude" and DS#1 and what to do. DH will <i>freak out</i> if he finds out ... not like I'm gonna tell him about it ... but it seems like it's time. Sigh. Have been kind of chicken about it ... but she's right, we can't keep living like this. Anyway, she also knows one of my neighbors who is a particularly high and special individual, and I've given her my blessings to tell the neighbor about it. She seems to think someone nearby should be aware of it all.<br><br>
I honestly don't think DH is going to hurt me physically (not his style to physically pick on someone so close to his own size) but maybe she's right. I need someone on my side. Or something like that. Not sure if that's how to say it but maybe that's what I mean ... or something like it.<br><br><br><br><br>
Enough rambling. On to the thread, mamas.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">s Amy
 

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Oh, Amy, <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/grouphug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="grouphug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: Please let us know if we can do anything for you. PM if you want the name of a psychologist in Israel -- very close family friend, stellar person. Not frum, but an amazing person.<br><br>
Yeah, I think I may go for it. I actually have almost the required number of clinical hours from being a leader (you can have 500 a year that count toward the 2500 requirement). I'm pretty sure my ped might let me intern by him as well if I wanted to. I know my former midwife would.<br><br>
Why not?! I am also hoping to do a CPS Tech class in the near future. I think some days it's a toss up about how disgusted I am in my community about how people misuse/don't use carseats properly, and how bad the info is about breastfeeding. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">:<br><br>
Okay I gotta get some work done now. More later.
 

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Amy <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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subbing.<br><br>
Amy please do whatever needs to be done for the entire family. Just because you think you are safe from physical violence does not mean that this situation does not take a significant toll on your emotional health.<br><br>
Abby
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> even if HE won't - YOU go to therapy. run, don't walk. I mean it.
 

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Nicole, go for it - sounds win-win<br><br>
I'm depressed about my lack of monetary contribution here - am also dealing with a graduate degree that is going nowhere right now<br><br>
hugs, Amy, BB, Liba and all<br><br>
Tikva, hope the allergy info solves the problem<br><br>
I hate mentioning names, cause I feel like I'm leaving someone out<br><br>
hi everyone!
 

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Just subbing in... I have been reading, just haven't had time for replies. But have been davening for those who need.<br><br>
Feeling really overwhelmed by it all.<br><br>
Everyone, chant with me:<br><br>
CALGON, TAKE ME AWAY!!<br><br>
Seems like we could all use a vacation! Better yet:<br><br>
WE WANT MOSHIACH NOW!!!
 

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Subbing.<br><br>
And I have <b><span style="font-size:xx-large;"><span>GOOD NEWS!</span></span></b><br><br>
The neurologist called us back! And he's going to set up a 72-hour monitoring. And it "sounds like generalized seizures" to him.<br><br>
Not that generalized seizures are good, but a response is good.<br><br>
And <span><span style="font-size:xx-small;">bad news</span></span>. My mother has been diagnosed with a skin disorder that is related to liver, kidney, all sorts of systems failure. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> They aren't sure what the underlying disorder is yet.
 

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Amy, I tried when I was little to watch Star Wars. Now that I am big I have tried again. And try as I might, I am also not into it. There just are some folks who aren't into it, I have come to realize.<br><br>
Hope you find the right help for your family.<br><br>
BB - refuah shaimah for your DH.<br><br>
Chodesh tov, mamas.
 

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B'H' the neurologist called you back MV! Sure took him long enough! Sorry to hear about your mom.<br><br>
Amy- if it's even crossed your mind that your DH might become physically violent, then things are a lot worse with you than I realized. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"> Looking back, I can see abuse in my relationship with DS' dad MONTHS before things actually got violent. And he still denied the abuse and the violence at that point, because he hadn't actually hit me (apparently knocking me over backwards in a chair while holding a baby isn't violent, and dragging me out of the bedroom by my arms isn't either.)
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>SaraFR</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7891050"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">MV-I'm glad you got a reponse. R"S to your mother.</div>
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<br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">:<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Discussion Starter #15
You know, last week when we were cleaning up from Pesakh and I was throwing out the many cardboard tubes from the paper rolls and foil rolls that the kids were playing with ... we were in the middle of fighting about (what else) the way he talks to DS#1 (it's the only thing we fight about, the way he behaves) and I just flipped and wapped him on the hand (DH, that is) with a cardboard roll and then threw the roll across the room.<br><br>
I think that was when it became clear that it was time to get this out. I'm not a violent person but he makes *me* feel that way.<br><br><br><br>
But it took this friend, who was with us for Shabbos and saw him lose his temper at DS, not let DS talk, always cutting him off ... to give me the kick in the pants. Honestly, DH is much better when we have guests. Obviously. The only people who really see this are people who are close to us/see us often.<br><br>
Though BB and her DH saw my DH go off on DS#1 also (remember, BB, when DS#1 knocked into your DS#3?) and while he didn't hurt him (and while DS#1 really should have been more careful), remember, BB, your DH said to me that "that was just not appropriate."<br><br>
It helps me when others see it. Sometimes I think that it's just my overreaction to DH's Low Frustration Tolerance issues, so it's necessary for me to have people point out that they see it, too.<br><br><br><br><br><br>
Sigh.<br><br><br><br><br><br>
Am just hoping the NbN social services person doesn't direct me to a child psychiatrist for DS#1 that came on the same NbN flight as us. He's local, and am personally not crazy about his kids. Is it not a good sign when you don't like the child therapist's children? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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Discussion Starter #16
m'v, ain't that the way it always happens? One good thing ... and then the other side. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br><br><br>
Ain't it frustrating that a doctor just calling you back is considered a good thing and progress? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/banghead.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="banghead"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>merpk</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7891487"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Is it not a good sign when you don't like the child therapist's children? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"></div>
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maybe, maybe not - I can not control my kids but I am an excellent teacher (if I do say so myself hahaha) - no seriously, I am.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 

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Amy <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"> I also think it is a good idea to get help for ds and dh - and for you to get support , you shouldn't go through this alone.<br>
The stress of aliya, language, culture etc; can all make a situation worse for anyone. please don't wait <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/grouphug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="grouphug"><br><br>
mv , am relieved and both sad for you. Wishing that you should here only good news! R"S to your mother.<br><br>
Nicole , personally, I think it is a great idea. You can always charge less / not charge someone from your community who really needs your help and doesn't have $, and you could offer "specials" etc;<br>
Iam also going through "what do I really wanna do " besides being a full time mother and also make some money while doing something.<br><br>
o.k .....<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">: it's official, "the gremlins have taken dd 14 and left an alien in her place"!!!!!!Besides "normal" teenage "stuff" she has just become so.......what can I say ...distant, non caring, angry,<br>
she just looks at me and rolls her eyes, she's cool and wer'e not and she has become so chutzpadik!!! She has even lied to us! all this and more from our "little angel" as dh used to call her, she was carried in a sling so much that almost all her baby pics are in a sling, we have always been so close and Iam just having a hard time not taking it personally. I don't want to talk lashon hara, but , well dd 19 was more challenging as a child , yet as a teen has remained very close to us, so iam feeling like I just got punched, since I wasn't expecting this from dd 14 ( Yeah I know nobody expects this<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> ) but ykwim....ap is not a guarantee that they don't become a little <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">: crazy<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: as teens
 

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But controlling your class and getting your kids to cooperate are two different things. Really.<br><br>
And Amy, you totally totally need to get help for your whole family. Please. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"><br><br><br>
And yeah, it is sad that it's progress...but evidently, this whole fiasco we had a couple of months ago with our appointments being canceled, not by us, is kind of why he didn't call us back. He thought we didn't want to come there anymore.<br><br>
Oh, and playing really stupid works.<br><br><br>
Oh, and having the MAN talk to him.<br><br>
Cuz if Abba/Daddy/T--- (as J calls him) is concerned, it must be real.<br><br><br>
ARRRRRRRRG.
 

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Gilla, doesn't Chava have a book she was reading about that. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
Ok, well, not <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> cuz it'll happen to me. But still. The book was <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 
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