[Ellie'sMom]

Joy: You're not a freak (well not based on this anyway

). I've had exacly that pain. It is definitely ligaments.

Ekblad: Thanks for starting the thread! Could you cut and paste the list of mamas and due dates, and add it to your first post? It is a helpful reference. Thanks!

 

[Ellie'sMom]

Lesley: I'd say CD 15 if you are pretty confident about your CM consistency and cervical position. In fact, I've rarely seen such a pretty chart! You had all the signs and GIO'd at the perfect times!

Periwinkle: Thanks for the crossed fingers. I am still so freaked out about posting here, so I really understand why you've been lurking. I have an u/s on Friday. I should be 7w4days (or 6 days or 2 days, I'm a little confused about my o date), so I should be able to see a hb. Good luck with your u/s. Sending you lots of healthy singleton baby vibes!!

Shannon: WOOHOO!!! Yay squirmy baby!

Ekblad: I'm glad you have great midwives! I am playing phone tag right now with a local CNM who does homebirths. I can't wait to meet her.

Lesley: What a relief that the herpes sounds manageable. I'm sorry about the rough day. The kids were nuts our last week of school as well, but for me that just meant treating lots of injuries from fights and playground injuries. OT, but I would love to hear more about the school you are in. This was my first year working in a school. It is such a unique culture!

Amy: My FIL is the king of unsolicited advice. I want to second what others have said about just keeping it as a non-issue if possible, especially at this point. I should tell you that I had some passionate discussions with the ILs about co-sleeping before dd was born. Ultimately, co-sleeping did not work for us. Ellie is a really light sleeper (like her mama) and she sleeps better in her own space. I hated the satisfied look on FIL's face when he heard that we bought a crib. Argh. On the other hand, I never discussed EBF with FIL (though I know he thought it was wierd), but I just kept nursing her. When we saw the ILs at Christmas, FIL commented on how independent and adventurous dd is. He also saw her nurse a ton. I am hoping just seeing my terrific kid made the argument. If you need to, maybe just say something like, "Well, we'll do what works for our family." That's my fallback now.

Mehndi: Hope your sluggitude ends soon!

Raven: Sending good beta vibes!

Things were much better today. My mom is here now, and dd is sooo happy to have her GM to play with. It takes lots of pressure off, but I really miss dh!

 

[Ellie'sMom]

OMG you chatty pattys! In the time it took me to write my post (I was talking to my mom too, so granted it was like 45 minutes.) there were 5 more posts!!

I'm going to curl up in bed and read my new Mothering mag. You all tire me out.

 

[Ellie'sMom]

Big

Denise. You know I know where you're coming from. You are NOT going to jinx anything with wishing you weren't sick.

Trying to catch up on work, so no time for a real post. Just had to pop over and give a hug and a dope slap to m&m.

 

[Ellie'sMom]

Ekblad. I hope you are getting plenty of rest. Did your mw mention taking extra Vitamin E? Is Susan Weed's Herbal for the Childbearing Year, she suggests taking up to 2000 IU per day for a threatened m/c. I did not take that much, but when I was spotting last week I took 800-1200 IU per day in addition to what is in my prenatal. I stopped spotting within a day of starting this. It could be a coincidence, but I don't think it could hurt. I am still taking 400 IU per day now. I also know what you mean about not wanting to get hopes up while not wanting to give up. For several days I managed to really let go of all expectations, and it was so liberating. I am now back to feeling hopeful, which scares the $hit out of me, because I don't want to be let down. It's a tough place to be. I hope you doc gets back to you soon.

I am totally wiped out. I am really tired. M/s is still mild, though it is more noticeable now which is reassuring. My u/s is tomorrow, and dh comes home from his trip tonight!

Kitty and Shannon: Hang in there! Can you get an injection of demerol for your hip? You need to sleep!

Lianne, Hev and Denise: Yay for the little beating hearts!!

Amy: That mw sounds awesome! It must feel great to have an ally in such a faceless monolithic system. It sounds like you will get the birth you want!

Raven: Excellent betas!

Periwinkle: Thanks for the mantra reminder. I can always use it!

So please send lots of positive vibes for the u/s tomorrow. I am terrified. It is the same place I went in Feb. and I keep having flashbacks to staring at that tiny, still image on the screen. At least I won't be alone this time (dh coming). I just reread that, and I'm sorry it's such a downer, but I just had to express this dark feeling to someone. With dh out of town I haven't been able to express my fears to anyone. Anyway, 24 hours from now I should know.

to you all!

 

[Ellie'sMom]

Ekblad: Feel no guilt about calling the OB. Do what you have to to feel reassured. Though I'm planning a homebirth I am going to my old mws at the birthcenter for now, simply because they can order betas, and u/s and such. No harm. No foul. (I actually have no idea what that means, but it seems appropriate

)

Sending you tons of

vibes!! Let us know.

 

[Ellie'sMom]

Yay Ekblad!!!!!! That is sooo good to hear. I was sending sticky vibes all day!

OK you all. After no spotting for over a week and a half I had some brownish cm tonight. More than anything it makes me feel

: . I just want to tell the fates, "Stop yankin' my chain already!" Thank goodness the u/s is tomorrow.

Before I go staighten up in anticipation of Dh's arrival (woohoo), I just need to say what a terrific group of women you are. I want to stay pregnant for lots of reasons of course, but part of it is wanting to share this journey with you 2/05 mamas.

 

[Ellie'sMom]

Hi all. Wish I had good news. There was no heartbeat. Looks like everything stopped sometime last week.

I am numb, angry and sad. I think I will be taking a little time away from MDC. Need to get my head together.

Thanks for all the support.